He gives a little laugh as he speaks his first words to me. “Well, that’s fucking embarrassing.”
I sniff back the tears and choke out a laugh. “Sorry. I didn’t expect that, either. It’s great to see you, man.” When our eyes meet again, neither of us can hold back our grins.
“Thanks for coming home in one piece, dude. I missed you.”
I throw my arm around his shoulder and haul him back into me as I drag him away from the chaos of loved ones crying and fawning over their own soldiers. He has to hunch down a bit for me to do it, but he allows it and laughs as we stride away. “I missed you too, bud.”
We walk to where all my stuff is—well, my one large, canvas pack—and I go to lift it to my shoulder, but Jay beats me to it and snatches it. He hefts it over his back as I drop my jaw.
“You’re gonna carry my pack?”
“Yeah. One of the many ways I’m thanking you for your service.”
“You know that’s kind of emasculating, right?”
“Then so be it.” He lunges away from me as I try to grab it from him. “Let me emasculate you!” he mocks seriously but still smiles.
I shake my head in defeat and roll my eyes as I follow him to his SUV, opening my own door before he can. He places my bag in the trunk and comes around to the driver’s seat, where he puts the keys in the ignition but pauses before turning it on. He looks over at me for a long moment, and a bright white smile slowly spreads. I finish clicking my seatbelt into place as I watch him. All of a sudden, my hands are sweaty and I’m not sure what to do with them. A twinge of something uncertain and electrifying zips through me as I watch him watch me.
As fast as lightning, he throws his arm at me and smacks me against the chest several times in rapid succession and hollers, “I fucking missed you, dude!” The whole vehicle shakes as we both start playfully hitting each other. We sound like a couple of kids giggling as we smack each other around.
This is already the best day I’ve had in the last year—since the last time I saw him, come to think of it. Don’t get me wrong, all those messages back and forth kept me going in the last twelve months. But actually being in Jay’s presence once again?Thatis wholly different.
“Okay, that’s enough!” he exclaims, leaning away from my attack. “I’m supposed to make you rest and feel comfortable, not rile you up.”
Leaning back into my leather seat, I lay my head back, catching my breath as I watch him turn the ignition. “What do you mean?”
“I read up on how to make sure you’re reintegrated comfortably after deployment. I’m supposed to make you rest, not beat you up.”
I guffaw. “Isthatwhat you call what just happened?”
He turns our seat warmers on full blast as the car warms up and he gives me a side-eye. “Yeah. You wouldn’t stand achanceif I was in full fight mode.”
“Is that right?”
“I don’t know if you know this, Marco, but I’msomuch stronger than you—and scrappier.” Jay’s face says he’s serious, but his tone tells me he knows he’s being ridiculous.
I’m laughing so hard my stomach and cheeks hurt. “I’d love to see you try and take me.”
He stifles a smile and I watch heat color his face and neck. He throws the SUV in gear and pulls out. “Careful what you wish for, dude.”
“You have the next three months to prove it to me.”
Again, he stifles a smile, poorly. “I never back down from a challenge.”
We set out on our drive back to Philly, and Jay’s loaded up the car with convenience store snacks—seriously, it looks like he ransacked a Wawa—and I could not be happier. It’s amazing how taste can transport you back to familiarity and a sense of home.
“You didn’t want to bring Willow with you?” I ask Jay as he tosses back the crumbs at the bottom of a Cheetos bag.
He finishes chewing as he gives me an uncomfortable look. “We actually broke up yesterday.”
“What? I’m sorry. What happened?”
“It kinda started going downhill before Christmas. I wanted her to come to meet my family for the holiday, but she had plans with her other partners that whole week all the way through the new year. And I don’t know, I guess it made me realize I was pretty fucking jealous. I realized I don’t think I’m cut out for that kind of relationship. I want to be with my partner all the time. I don’t like the idea of them having relationships outside of ours.”
“So it was like, she was with you, but she was also with other people in separate couplings?”
“Yeah. It wasn’t fair to her or me that I felt jealous. And like, I’ve met her other partners, and they’re all nice enough, but… I need more.”
