"Jury's still out."
He kissed the top of my head, and something in my chest squeezed. I wanted to hold onto this moment, bottle it up and keep it safe. Wanted to believe that maybe, just maybe, this could be real. That he meant what he said about staying.
But I'd believed him before.
"I understand why you left," I whispered as I nuzzled into him more. "Your brother died. You had responsibilities. I get it, Eric. I do."
"But?"
"But it doesn't mean it didn't destroy me." I closed my eyes. "My life was never a walk in the park, but I felt like I was getting a handle on things. Like everything was going to be okay. And then you vanished. One text and my world shattered. Maybe I'd put too much importance on you in my life, hoped too much for something good. Thought it was going to become more." I swallowed hard. "And then you were gone."
Eric's arms tightened around me. "Ivy?—"
"I'm not trying to make you feel guilty." I wasn't. Not really. "I just need you to understand that this—" I gestured vaguely between us "isn't easy for me. Being here with you, letting you back in even a little bit, it's terrifying."
"I know." His voice was tight. "If I could go back and do it differently?—"
"You can't." I looked up at him. "So what happens now?"
"Now..." He brushed his thumb across my cheekbone. "Now I'm here. For as long as you'll let me be."
I wanted to believe him. God, I wanted to believe him so badly it hurt.
Instead, I let myself sink into his warmth, let the steady rhythm of his breathing lull me. Tomorrow I could be smart. Tomorrow I could protect myself.
Tonight, I just wanted to feel safe. To enjoy the false comfort of his arms, the false hope that he wouldn't abandon me again.
My eyes drifted closed, and the last thing I felt was Eric's lips against my forehead.
I woke to an empty bed.
For a moment, I just stared at the ceiling, refusing to acknowledge the vacant spot beside me. Refusing to feel the hollow ache spreading through my chest.
Then I heard it. Low voices from the living room.
No. Not voices.
One voice.
Eric's.
I slipped out of bed, pulled on my robe, and padded silently to the doorway. He stood by my window, phone pressed to his ear, speaking in hushed tones I couldn't quite make out.
My stomach dropped.
Of course.Of course there was someone else. Of course last night had been a mistake. Four years was a long time. He'd probably moved on, probably had a whole life I knew nothing about, and I'd just?—
Eric turned and saw me. His expression shifted, something I couldn't read flickering across his face. He nodded once and ended the call.
"I have to go," he said into the phone. "We'll discuss this later."
He pocketed his phone and crossed to me, but I stepped back.
"Who was that?" There was no hiding the distrust in my voice.
"Work."
"At five in the morning?" I arched a brow.
