I grab the back of her neck, rougher than I mean to. She gasps, and for a heartbeat, I think I’m going to stop, but instead, I pull her closer. Her mouth finds mine, hot and bitter with alcohol. I taste lipstick and fresh mint.
This isn’t what I want. It’s what Ideserve.
The kiss turns harsh, both of us taking what we can from the wreckage.
Her nails bite into my arms, and my grip on her hair tightens. It’s a fight disguised as comfort, punishment dressed as pleasure.
She makes quick work of the button, flicking my jeans open and wrapping her hand around my semi-hard erection. “I’ve missed this,” she pants, working my cock with her expert touch.
I let my head fall back, closing my eyes, but all I can picture is her.Remi.“Fuck,” I mutter, rubbing my eyes as if that’ll somehow help.
“Shall we go to my room?” she asks.
I sigh, my erection instantly deflating. “Forget it,” I mutter, shoving her away. She stares at me like a wounded puppy. “I can’t,” I add a little gentler.
“Because of her?” she demands, pushing to her feet. “Isn’t she a fucking thief?” she asks, scoffing.
I’m up quicker than she can blink and in her face, fastening my jeans. “Who the fuck told you that?”
She has the decency to look guilty. “Sorry, Shadow, I didn’t mean anything by it.”
“Stay out of my business,” I growl, pushing past her and heading up to my room.
Chapter Nineteen
Remi
I wake with a start, my heart hammering so hard, it hurts. I realise the blindfold is gone and I’m lying on the bed, but the room’s dim, with shadows stretching long across the walls. For a second, I think I’m dreaming, until I see him.
Shadow stands at the foot of the bed, his shoulders hunched and his fists balled tight at his sides. His eyes are dark, unreadable, and the sight of him like that makes every muscle in my body lock. The smell hits next. It’s not his usual scent. It’s whiskey. Thick. It clings to him, to the air between us.
My throat tightens, guilt crashing over me in waves.I did this.Whatever’s broken in him tonight, it’s my fault.
He doesn’t move. Doesn’t speak. Just stands there, breathing slow, like he’s holding something back. The silence stretches so long, it hums in my ears.
I slowly sit and press my spine against the headboard. My pulse skitters as memories flash through my mind. Colin’s glare, his slurred words, the sharp sting of his temper. Being here, tied up, takes me right back to then.
“Logan,” I whisper, barely able to get the word out. “I mean, Shadow.”
His jaw ticks. He blinks once, slow, then drags a hand down his face, tension rippling through every line of him. “Don’t,” he rasps. “Don’t look at me like that.” The words come rough and low, and I still can’t breathe right until he finally takes a step back.
“If you don’t believe me, I can call him,” I whisper, my throat dry and tight. “The man I owe money to.”
His eyes narrow, dangerous and calm all at once. “You should be screaming in pain right now,” he mutters. “Tied to that chair. Black and blue.”
I swallow the panic clawing at my chest. “If that’s what you have to do, Shadow, do it. I’ve been through worse.”
His jaw ticks harder, the muscles in his arms flexing as he glances towards the window. “Maybe I should just put you back out there,” he mutters, like he’s thinking out loud. “That’s what you do when strays bite the hand that feeds them.”
“Fine,” I whisper. “Let me go, and I’ll never darken your doorstep again.”
“That’d be too easy,” he growls.
I let out a sharp, broken laugh. “So, what do you want to do, Shadow?” My voice cracks, rising with the tremor in my chest. “Break me? I’m already there.” The words tear out of me, too fast, too raw. “Because whatever happens, I can never catch a fucking break. So, beat me, pull off my fingernails, cut me, rape me, do whatever the fuck you want. And when you’ve had your fun, toss me back on the street like a dog. It’s what I deserve.” Tears burn hot as I choke out the rest. “And when that guy finds me, he’ll finish the job. Then you can sleep easy knowing I paid the price for trying to cross you and your club.”
His breathing grows heavier. His fists clench tighter. One second, I’m on the edge of the bed, and the next, his hand ison my wrist and he hauls me up so fast, my breath stutters. His fingers dig into my upper arm hard enough to bruise, and the look on his face makes my stomach flip with fear.
“Don’t test me. And don’t try spinning this story to make you the victim.”
