They ate in silence, and Alice re-wrapped the bandages around Ethan’s ankle before they tidied the cottage and headed out.
Their progress was slow, and even with the walking stick, Ethan still needed Alice’s support. It was a bit awkward when he first wrapped his arm across her shoulders, bringing them close together once again, but it couldn’t be helped. Alice was determined to think rationally about the situation and forget all about how she had completely abandoned any sense of propriety within the last day.
Thankfully, they hadn’t traveled far before they heard their names being called, with Matthias soon pulling up on horseback.
“They’re over here!” he yelled to the others in his search party, waving his hat. “It’s good to see you, sir,” he said to Ethan as he dismounted. “Everyone has been terribly concerned for the pair of you.”
A moment later, West came thundering up on his own horse. “Oh, thank god,” he exclaimed, leaping off and tossing his hat to embrace Alice. “Priscilla has been out of her mind. I assuredher that you must have been caught in the storm and were smart enough to take shelter somewhere. Thankfully, I was right!” Releasing Alice, he grabbed Ethan as well and heartily thumped him on the back. “What happened to you—are you alright?” he asked, assessing them both.
“Just a minor mishap and an unfortunate twisted ankle,” Ethan replied. “Nothing a day or two of rest won’t handle.” West looked at him intently, sensing there was likely more to the situation, but he let it go for the moment.
“Well, I do hope that is true, my friend. Come now, let’s get you both home.”
CHAPTER 19
Alice didn’t see Ethan for a few days after returning to Hampton House, as both had been confined mainly to their rooms. He’d needed to stay off his feet as much as possible and allow his ankle to heal, and she’d fallen ill with head congestion after their prolonged exposure to the elements.
Now, three days later, Alice was restless. Thank god for little Knightly. The sweet kitten was her constant companion, snoozing on her chest whenever she napped or attempted to read. But much to her chagrin, the ginger gentleman also reminded her of Ethan’s kindness and gentle nature when she was determinedlynotthinking about the estate manager.
Pacing her room, she was able to observe work in the gardens below, longing to be out there. Priscilla had expressly forbidden it, though, until her nose stopped running and coughing ceased.
She watched anxiously as the local mason began work on a low stone wall that would wind around much of the central garden. It was not a small undertaking, and while she trusted Matthias, she wanted to be there with them to provide direction. But more than anything, she needed a task to keep her occupied, to keep her mind away from what had transpired with Ethan in the cottage.
A knock sounded and it wasn’t a moment before Priscilla peeked her head around the edge of the door.
“How are you feeling? Would you like some company?”
“Please,” Alice groaned. “I’m going crazy being quarantined up here.” Unfortunately, she let out a large sneeze at this precise moment. Blowing her nose while Priscilla made herself comfortable on the settee by the fire, Alice resumed her pacing, sending Knightly scampering under the settee for protection from her swirling dressing gown.
“How is the mason getting along? Have you received any updates? Has Ethan resumed working?” She whirled around to look at Priscilla, hoping her tone remained normal at her inquiry.
Priscilla just laughed. “Sit down. All your spinning about is making me even more nauseous.”
“Morenauseous?” Alice sat abruptly on the other end of the settee, concerned for her cousin. “Have you caught my illness?”
“No, it’s not anything from you that is causing my symptoms.” A smile bloomed on Priscilla’s face. “I have been feeling unwell, but it’s not because I’m ill. I’m expecting a child.”
“Oh, Priscilla!” Alice exclaimed, eyes filling with tears. “I’m so pleased for you and West.” To her horror, the tears didn’t stop at a simple, effusive welling. Before she knew why, Alice was crying into her hands, trying to conceal the evidence of her overflowing emotions.
“Oh, Alice! Darling—whatever is wrong?” Priscilla scooted across the cushions, disrupting Knightly, and wrapped her arms around her.
Alice calmed herself after a moment and pulled back from Priscilla, taking the handkerchief she proffered. “I’m so sorry, I really don’t know what’s wrong with me,” she said, dabbing her eyes. “I truly am so happy for you, I just . . . just . . .” Her traitorous eyes began to well again.
“Are you simply overwhelmed from the last few days, or should I be concerned?” Priscilla’s eyes were narrowed in concern as she looked at Alice critically. Her hand formed rhythmic circles on Alice’s back, already acting like an attentive mother.
“I promise I’m fine. You and West are going to be incredible parents. It seems ridiculous to cry at such a happy announcement. It’s just that I . . .” She trailed off again, unable to admit the terrible, selfish things she was feeling alongside her genuine joy.
“You can tell me, Alice. What is it that’s bothering you?”
Taking in a deep breath, looking at the floor, Alice braced herself. “It’s just that sometimes I find myself envious of you and all you have,” she admitted. “The happiness that you’ve found with West. I’m so pleased for you, truly I am, but I’m also selfishly feeling sad, as I doubt I’ll ever have what you do.”
There, it was spoken. Exhaling shakily, she chanced a glance at Priscilla.
“Oh, sweet Alice. I understand feeling a mix of emotions all at once, but why do you think you’ll never be happy?” Priscilla asked, still caressing her back.
Alice relaxed into the settee. “Because I don’t expect I’ll be able to make a love match like yours. What I care for in a man is not of the foremost concern when it comes to whom I’ll likely marry. I’ve always known my duty to the family.”
Priscilla closed her eyes and pressed her lips together. “I’d hoped you were beginning to see that there is more of importance in the world than making a match to please Uncle, but perhaps I’ve not been direct enough.” Her eyes sprang open, and she stared directly at Alice.
