West let out a moan of pleasure and dropped his chin to his chest, allowing her freer access. The sound that escaped him bordered on erotic, and with his warm skin beneath her hand, Priscilla began to blush.
“Your fingers feel like magic,” he said. “Where did you learn to do this?”
“After Stern had his apoplexy, he couldn’t move the right side of his body,” she replied. “Occasionally, his muscles would seize and had to be manipulated back into softness. One of his attendants taught me how to do so.” Priscilla thought back to the nearly eighteen months that Stern had lived in discomfort until his eventual passing. It had not been a comfortable life, he had trouble speaking and eating due to the semi-paralysis. But being by his bedside taught her about compassion and the dignity of others.
“I sometimes forget that you’ve lived through difficult times,” West said quietly. “You’re so bright and alive now that it’s hard to imagine you confined to home as your husband’s caretaker.”
Working her thumb into a particularly large knot where his neck and shoulder met, Priscilla thought about that time. “It wasn’t terrible, though certainly not how I’d anticipated spending my years as a young bride. Even though Stern and I had not been married long before he became ill, I came to respect him. And our partnership meant ensuring he received the best care and was as comfortable as possible. That necessitated me learning what kind of care he needed.”
“You were a good wife to him,” West said quietly, head still bowed. “I can see that the situation forced you to mature.”
“As odd as it may sound, I’m grateful for the experience,” Priscilla said as she shifted her hands, tilting his head up to rub his temples. “Of course, I would never wish for Stern to have suffered. But as you say, the experience forced me to grow up and see what is most important in life, and achieving rank and status is certainly not.”
Mesmerized by the feel of his cheeks in her palms as she soothed the tension in his brow, she continued to speak wistfully. “Stern was a good man and partner, but that does notequate to true happiness. I vowed that if I were to marry again, it would be someone I chose for myself because I cared for them. That way the marriage would not feel so empty, bound by more than duty.”
Priscilla found herself gazing at his beautiful face as she spoke of her desire for love. His eyes were still closed, but as she stopped speaking and began running her fingers through his hair, holding them rigid to massage his scalp, he opened them and looked up at her.
From where she was standing over him, she had only to bend her neck slightly to reach down and kiss him. Their lips were practically aligned in their current postures, it would be so easy to simply drift forward and allow gravity to gently pull them together until they met naturally. She longed to kiss him again but knew it would be dreadfully unwise.
West must have read some of the desire in her expression, for a moment later, he blinked and pulled away from her hands.
“Thank you,” he said after clearing his throat. “That was wonderful, I feel much better. But if you’ll excuse me, I have much to prepare before leaving.” He wouldn’t look at her as he shuffled papers into a stack on his desk. Priscilla knew she had ruined the tender moment by allowing her feelings, which she still did not wish to acknowledge, get away from her. Taking a step back, she was determined to leave on a good note.
“Have a wonderful time with your family on the estate, I’ll see you when you return.” That said, Priscilla made a quick exit before he could see just how much she wanted to stay.
CHAPTER 18
West dropped his head into his hands after Priscilla shut the door behind her. How many times in the last few weeks had he needed to remind himself that what was between them wasn’t real? It would be nothing but foolishness to lose his mind, lean into his desire for her, and kiss her senseless. If Priscilla had leaned in any further, he wouldn’t have been able to restrain himself.
Every time they had danced while out together in last weeks, West had to fight his own instincts—compelling his arms to stay braced and in form, keeping her at a respectable distance rather than pulling her body close to his.
Though not the purpose of the trip, he was eager to leave town for a while. Some distance from Priscilla would help him clear his mind. The fake relationship was still serving its purpose, but he couldn’t allow himself to be too distracted by the woman who was supposed to be keeping him from other distractions.
Twisting his head around, West stretched out his neck. Priscilla’s fingers were like magic and had worked wonders at easing the tension that seemed to keep his shoulders permanently hiked towards his ears these days. Now looser, heshould take advantage of his momentary physical reprieve and work off some of his agitation in the ring.
While not a serious boxer, or sportsman in general for that matter, he did enjoy working his body with another while in town. At home in the country, he could take long, invigorating rides on his loyal horse, Shakespeare. He loved how alive he felt with the wind whipping past him when he let his mount lose to run as fast as he pleased. But here in the city, such riding was not possible, and he found boxing to be the best alternative when he needed a way to quiet his mind.
Gathering together his papers and placing all the work into neat, even piles—West called out for Morton. The butler quickly arranged a carriage and Roberts brought down his coat and a clean shirt to change into once he was through at Gentleman Jackson’s.
West was tying up his hands by the ring a half hour later when he heard his name. Lifting his head up, he saw Viscount Hastings smiling and walking his direction.
“Hastings,” he said in greeting with a quick nod.
“None of that,” the viscount said with a laugh as he clapped a hand firmly on West’s shoulder, causing it to drop slightly at the impact from the taller man. “You must call me Sidney. My wife couldn’t stop singing your praises after dinner at the Weston’s a few weeks ago, and I know Reid is happy to have you added to our ranks. Whigs are few and far between in Lords, so we must consider one another friends based on the evidence before us.”
West couldn’t help but return the man’s contagious grin as he shook his proffered hand. “I’m happy for any new friend. Are you up for a spar? I could use an outlet right about now.”
Sidney squinted at him and shook his head. “You’re all knotted up about a woman, aren’t you? I can always tell these things.”
Stiffening, West replied, “Actually, it’s about business.” When Sidney crinkled his freckled brow upon his response, he relented. “Fine, it’s also somewhat about a woman,” he grumbled.
Throwing his head back in a booming laugh, Sidney cuffed him on the shoulder again. “No better way to get it out of your system than throwing a few punches. Come on, I’m waiting for my friend Henry—you know him, Duke of Carrington, but I’ll go a few rounds with you until His Grace deigns to show up.”
Both men shed their waistcoats and checked their hands were appropriately wrapped before raising the rope and stepping onto the raised platform. It was a friendly bout, with neither of them being too aggressive. Still, West worked up a sweat and felt the strain in his arms, which in turn soothed his mind as his focus shifted entirely to his body.
West tried to center his weight and used his feet to turn and quickly pivot from the cutting angle of Sidney’s fists as they came at his body. Angling to his right as the viscount came at him with a left hook, his focus was momentarily diverted to a small group of men near the entrance who were chatting while watching the match. West noticed that Cumberland was among them. The earl raised a glass of something most likely alcoholic in salute while looking him straight in the eye and giving one of his signature smirks. Distracted, West didn’t move quickly enough to see Sidney’s fist coming as it landed squarely on his left cheek.
His face smarting, West landed on the floor with an audible thud, and he was almost certain he could hear his cousin laughing at his expense.
