He smiled down at her, and it was so dazzling Elise thought the sun must have broken through the cloud cover. “I should hope not,” Weston said, his voice low. “And I very much hope it might happen again.” She shivered at the thought, and he wrapped his arms around her even tighter, mistaking her quaking for being cold.
Back at the house, Elise had been stunned by Pricilla’s observation that she might have feelings for the earl based on how she had turned to him for comfort. While she had not sought him out last evening—he had followed her, she certainly had not shied away from him when he had reached out to soothe her distress. What she had told him was true, she was sure that if it had been any other man who had come after her last evening, she would have turned away from them. Yet with Weston, she didn’t hesitate. She hadn’t questioned for a moment that she was completely safe with him.
Elise had not given it any thought until it was brought to her attention, but reflecting on it now, she couldn’t ignore the truth of the situation. She trusted and respected the man, desiring to be around him. Even now, she enjoyed being in his arms and had very much thrilled at the kiss they had just shared. What any of this meant moving forward, she couldn’t say. They clearly had no future together—the man was an earl and she had been cast out of polite society. The aristocracy would never accept her as a match for him if he was even thinking such a thing. Elise realized her thoughts were running much further ahead than the present situation called for, and she knew she needed to reign herself back in.
“What are you thinking about so intently?” Weston asked, breaking her concentration.
“Nothing, my lord,” she responded. “I was just wondering how I ended up here.”
He chuckled and she felt it rumble in his chest where her hands were resting. “I think at this point you can lose the formality and call me Reid,” he said against her hairline, leaning in to kiss her forehead.Reid, she liked that. It was the first time she had heard his Christian name and it suited him.
“Then you should call me Elise,” she replied.
“I’m afraid I already started thinking of you that way,” Reid admitted sheepishly. The fact that he felt close enough to think of her in more intimate terms sent warmth through her.
More than anything she wanted him to think well of her. Even though they had not known each other long, the trepidation she had felt about the new earl seemed utterly foreign now. It was hard to reconcile the image of the intimidating man she had imagined with the kind one now embracing her. Through what she had observed, he cared deeply about the estate and all who relied upon it. While the strained relationship with his father had kept him from being involved previously, she knew he was working hard, learning all he could and making improvements. Elise had seen Reid’s compassion for his people when he had accompanied her to the village for her clinic. She heard he was making rounds on the estate and discussing solutions for the most pressing problems, listening rather than just assuming he knew what was best, a rare trait in a man. And she appreciated the speed and grace with which he had handled her rental contract.
There was also the way Reid had simply been there for her not just once, but twice now, when she had felt at her absolute lowest. He did not seem to care a whit for her standing as a tarnished member of theton andhad embraced her, showing a compassion that was unequal to anything she had experienced personally since moving away from her family. Such consideration made her realize just how isolated she had become.
In short, Reid was dangerous, and clearly her feelings were beginning to run away from her. Elise had long given up on the idea that she would ever be able to marry after her ruination. While many had still supported her, no one would go so far as to risk lowering their own standing by linking themselves with her. So, she had let go of the idea when moving to Dorset. Not allowing herself to dwell on what she had lost often, there were still times when she felt immensely lonely. No longer belonging among the gentry, while the villagers and farmers had accepted her, she was not really one of them either. Having lived a life of privilege, they could never fully understand one another’s lived experiences, making her an outsider no matter how close she became to some of the women in town. Nora and Jed had been like surrogate family, but in some ways she was still fundamentally alone and in a class all by herself.
Then along came Reid, and for the first time in years, Elise felt like she belonged. He accepted her for who she was now. She wanted to revel in the sense of rightness she felt standing here next to the sea in his arms. The desire to kiss him again and be as close to him as humanly possible was consuming, but she knew she needed to resist it. Elise had already lost Nora and Jed, and she did not think her heart could survive being torn apart again when she inevitably lost him as well. Even now, his mother was trying to find him a suitable match as he was responsible for furthering the Weston line. Elise knew with certainty that her name was not on the countess’ list, so she would be foolish to indulge herself with Reid any longer.
Reluctantly, Elise pulled back. Immediately feeling cold at the loss of his arms around her, she wanted to nestle back against his warmth and never leave. Instead, she tightened her shawl around her shoulders, turning to face the direction from which they had come.
“We should head back,” she said. “I’m sure you are missed at Cliff House.”
“I’d rather stay here with you,” he said sincerely.
“I’m not sure that’s the best idea, Reid,” she said, speaking his name for the first time. Looking down at the sand beneath her feet she began walking, trying to find the words to explain to him everything she had been thinking. “It seems clear there is an attraction between us—” Elise started hesitantly. Reid chuckled and nodded. “I’m grateful for everything you have done for me, and I would like to see if we could work together as friends moving forward. However, friendship must be the extent of it. While I do not regret what just passed between us, anything more would be unwise. There can be no future for us given the discrepancy in our social standing, so we should not tempt fate. I hope you will understand and agree.”
After saying her piece, Elise stopped and looked at him. A pained expression on his face, he stared at her intently, the corner of his mouth twitching as if he was holding back something he wanted to say. But instead of arguing with her, he gave a nod in acceptance. Reaching the dower house, he kissed the back of her hand and left without saying another word.
CHAPTER16
Two weeks had passed since Elise’s return to the dower house, they were a bit of a blur for Reid. He felt unmoored and was still reeling from the extreme emotions from one end of the spectrum to the other and back, all within the span of two days.
First, the uncontrolled rage and anger he had felt when learning what Dorsten had done to Elise. Then there was the compassion and care Reid felt towards her, the desire to protect instinctual. Next came elation and hope when she had kissed him on the beach, only to quickly crash into despair when she had told him in no uncertain terms that they could not be more than friends. Reid understood where she was coming from, she couldn’t imagine a world where they could ever be together.
He had stepped away from her that day in an effort to respect her wishes, but every part of him wanted to rush right back to her side. He’d never felt this strongly about anyone before and needed to regroup before approaching her again. Finding the right words to tell her with no uncertainty that he could care less about the differences in their social standing was important. He would happily tear down anyone or anything that told her they could not be together.
Reid hoped she understood him enough to know that he was not a normal member of the gentry, forced to build a life for himself apart from the role of landed peer when his father had stoutly denied his place. Finding his purpose outside the world of the aristocracy, much as Elise had been forced to do, happened when he joined the army and lived and breathed nothing but the life of a soldier and officer for fifteen years. When his injuries at Waterloo had all but ended that for him, he found a way to keep pursuing the purpose of bettering the lives of all Englishmen, regardless of class, when he was elected an MP to represent his county.
What all that amounted to was that Reid could give a damn about what the peerage or those consumed by it thought, even though he now lived as one of them. The only thing that mattered was that for the first time in his life, he wanted to share it with someone.
Reid had seen Elise a few times in the intervening weeks but had not pressed his case with her. She was still adjusting to life in the dower house without Nora and Jed and he did not want to add to her burden. The first time he saw her was when she had come to Cliff House to reclaim the items from her stay, and to ask for the loan of Jenny a little longer. She looked well, but did not stay long as the house party was still underway.
That had been another not so enjoyable situation Reid had to deal with. Returning to Cliff House after his morning on the beach with Elise, the last thing he wanted to do was interact with his houseguests. Attempting to escape unnoticed up the stairs, he was thwarted when he ran straight into his irate mother.
“Where have you been?” the countess demanded. “Lady Priscilla is upset and told her mother she wished to go home, and no one seems to know where Lord Dorsten has gone. I need your help!” Exasperated, she had continued to berate him for not being serious about finding a wife. Reid found it ironic really, as he had just left the woman he would be more than happy to make his wife.
“Mother, please calm down,” Reid implored. “I sent Dorsten home last night after he was inconceivably rude and inappropriate with a young woman. He will never be allowed in this house again.” At that information, thankfully, the countess had stopped protesting the man’s absence and let the matter drop. “As for Lady Pricilla, if she would like to go home, then we should let her. She is not bound here no matter how much you may wish it.” When his mother started to protest once again, he cut her off. “No, mother, I understand you had hopes for her becoming my wife, but she and I are better as friends. We would not suit one another in a life together.”
“I only want you to be happy Reid, but you need to live up to your duty as earl, and you must be realistic,” his mother said. “I don’t pretend to know the realities of the estate, but if your father felt the need to rent my dower house from beneath me and was trying to sell land, you’d be best served looking for a wife who can help boost your coffers. Lady Pricilla is an attractive option. As the widow of a duke, she is well set with the settlement she would have received upon his death. If she does not suit, fine, but look for someone with a large dowry.”
Reid cringed, understanding where his mother was coming from. An injection of funds for the estate would definitely be helpful, but it was certainly not his only criteria for finding a wife. “I assure you I will find someone, but there is no rush. Our period of mourning necessitates I will not be able to wed for at least ten more months. Let me wrap my head around managing the estate first, one thing at a time.” The countess offered him a stiff smile, but finally relented. The remainder of the gathering was much more pleasant after that, though dragged on much too long for Reid’s preference.
The second time Reid had seen Elise was a more pleasant occasion, but hardly one that allowed for discussion about a possible relationship. Jonathan and Evie arrived in Dorset and made an outstanding impression on Elise. After only a morning of conversation, she offered them positions almost immediately. While showing the two of them around the property, Reid had accompanied Elise and the siblings and was once again amazed at how many improvements she had made in such a short time with Jed and Nora’s help. He left the group reluctantly after dinner, but hoped he would be able to use his friendship with Jonathan as an excuse to visit the dower house more frequently moving forward.
