“Yes,” Elise nodded. “I decided I didn’t want to be in London anymore, and I came here with my father’s blessing using the money intended to be my dowry. Dorsten pushed me to make my plans to withdraw a reality, though I never told anyone he was the inciting incident that convinced me it was time to remove myself from society.”
“I really am so sorry, Elise,” Priscilla said. “I never in a million years would have thought my actions could have such horrible consequences. I only thought of myself . . . not how I was hurting you.” She looked distraught, and as angry as Elise had been with her over the years, they needed to put the past to rest so both could move on.
“It’s really alright,” Elise told her. “I’m just fine now. I’ve created a good life for myself here, and in many ways, I’m much happier and freer away from the constraints of polite society. I had spent so much time worrying about what would happen if I was ruined that once I was . . . it felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders as I didn’t need to fret about expectations any longer. I truly believe I’m a better person now, able to live as myself.” She smiled at Priscilla, wanting to make sure she understood.
“I wish I knew what that felt like,” Priscilla said, tears in her eyes. “I don’t want to be bound by others’ expectations anymore. I’m a grown woman, and a widow at that. I shouldn’t let my mother dictate my actions any longer. I want to be strong and my own woman like you.” Priscilla’s smile as she made this realization lit up the room, and Elise let out a wet laugh before reaching up to tightly hug the woman who had once been her rival.
Elise heard Weston pacing in agitation again as they pulled apart. Leaning into Priscilla, she spoke quietly so only she could hear. “Why don’t you leave me to talk with Weston. I need to assure him that I really am fine. I was just shaken seeing Dorsten again yesterday.”
Priscilla looked up at Weston, practically twitching in his fury, then back at Elise. “He cares for you,” she said just as quietly. “I can see it in how protective he was of you yesterday. I’ve never seen him react so strongly to a woman before.”
“I don’t know about that,” Elise said, feeling her cheeks warm.
“Well I do,” Priscilla said haughtily in the tone Elise was used to hearing from her. “And based on the way you sought comfort from him yesterday, I think you might care for him as well.”
With that thought lingering, Pricilla rose and kissed the top of Elise’s head, then left her alone to deal with a very agitated earl.
CHAPTER15
Reid wasn’t sure he had ever felt so much rage in his life. He could feel adrenaline coursing through his limbs and continued pacing as his breath started coming out in a rapid pant.
“Why don’t we go for a walk on the beach?” Elise suggested, somehow remaining calm. He nodded, fresh air sounding like a good idea. After gathering his coat and her shawl, they stepped out into the early October chill, and he took in a deep breath trying to calm himself down.
Reid wasn’t sure why he was reacting so strongly. What had happened to Elise was appalling, but she was correct that it had unfortunately happened many times before. He’d heard similar stories countless times, and while they had always raised his ire at the way so many men disregarded women as mere objects, it had never felt personal like this before. With a grimace, he realized it should have.
They walked down the coastline for a bit, neither saying anything, soaking in the stillness of the morning. The tang of the salty air and the rhythmic sound of the waves began to have a calming effect. Slowing down, Reid turned toward Elise.
“I’m sorry for my behavior,” he said. “I’m just appalled by what happened to you and the callous way women are regarded in society. Are you sure you are alright? You were profoundly upset last night.” Reid was concerned by the way she had physically reacted to seeing Dorsten again, it spoke to a deep emotional wound that he was not sure she had fully realized the extent of.
“I’m fine now. I’ve had a long time to come to terms with what happened. I was just caught off guard at seeing him again. I’ve tried to put that evening behind me, but obviously I was not successful.” Elise gazed out at the ocean as she calmly spoke. When he and Lady Pricilla had first found her this morning, he had been concerned by how blank she had looked, but she was now animated and her color had returned.
“Thank you for your care last evening. I’m sure you were confused as to what was happening, but you supported me, and I’m very grateful for that. Not everyone would side with a woman in such circumstances or even believe she has been wronged.”
“I’m not sure how anyone could see your reaction to the man and not believe you. I was worried for you, and he did himself no favors with his dismissive attitude having seen you upset.” Reid was getting worked up again as he thought about it and forced himself to relax the hands he had unconsciously clutched into fists. His desire to protect her and make sure no one ever harmed her again was overwhelming. Only knowing her for just over a two-week timespan, he felt a deep admiration for Elise and wanted nothing more than to spend time with her and see her smile.
She was so beautiful, both inside and out. The way she had started over and cared for the people here was inspiring. As a lady, Elise could have easily sequestered herself away in the dower house and no one would have found anything odd about it. But instead, she had taken the worst experience of her life and used it as an opportunity to create a new life for herself. She was self-assured most of the time and comfortable living in a way that most people from the class in which she had been raised would turn up their noses. Unafraid to do work for the betterment of her home and community, it was like she had blossomed with the purpose she now had in caring for these people and sharing what she could with them. Admiring her strength and persistence, he knew with certainty he wanted her in his life from now on.
Reid watched as she looked out at the sea, drawing her shawl closer around her. The cool breeze was tousling strands of hair around her face, and before he knew what he was doing, he reached out and brushed the strands from her cheek where they had been dancing across the smooth skin with the wind. As his fingers mimicked her hair in skimming over the slightly wind reddened skin, they both sucked in a breath at the contact. Tucking the errant strands firmly behind her ear, he let his fingers linger at the nape of her neck before pulling away.
Elise, who Reid realized with a start he had started to think about without the lady added to her name, turned towards him with a look of soft affection. Her eyes shining, a small smile was just starting to form as the corners of her mouth began a small uptick. He couldn’t keep himself from looking at her lips, and to prevent himself from kissing her, he pulled her into his arms. Just as she had the night before, Elise nestled her head into his chest below his chin. They stood there, neither moving or saying anything, and Reid never wanted to let her go. She felt so perfect in his arms he would have been happy to never move from his spot on the sand again, holding her forever. The feeling of rightness was almost overwhelming, and again the thought arose that he needed to keep her in his life.
Pulling back slightly, Elise lifted her deep brown eyes to his before looking down, her long lashes fanning across her cheekbones. “I feel like I’ve been a mess ever since you met me—all I’ve done is fall apart and cry for one reason or another. But you’ve been a constant source of support and strength, and I can’t thank you enough.”
Raising his hand, Reid cradled her cheek. “You’ve had a lot to deal with and seeing you in such despair last night broke my heart. It was one thing to see you distraught over Nora and Jed, but yesterday was born from something far more sinister, and I ached to see you in such pain.”
To his astonishment, Elise reached up and threaded her fingers through the hair at his temple where he was graying more with each passing year. “I’m not sure why,” she offered tentatively, “but ever since I met you, I’ve felt I could trust you. I know not all men think so little of or take advantage of women, but I think if anyone other than you had tried to comfort me last night, I would have shied away. My mental state regarding men was too fragile, but I felt completely safe with you, and I never questioned it.”
Catching his breath at her willingness to be so vulnerable and honest with him, Reid was swamped by a wave of emotion. “I can’t tell you what a gift you have given me with those words,” he said, voice rough. “I’m glad you feel like you can count on me. I want to be here for you. Always.”
“You are a good man, and I’m glad to know I have you in my corner,” Elise replied emotionally, seeming a bit stunned by his assertion.
Reid watched as she stood on her toes and ever so slowly angled her face up to kiss him. Elise’s lips touched his with only the gentlest pressure before retreating, but he felt as if she had branded him, marking him as hers. She looked at him from only an inch away with a question in her eye, and he answered, leaning back into her and claiming her lips once again. He moved slowly, wanting her to guide the kiss and show him how much she could handle. When she applied more pressure this time, he slid his hand from her cheek to the back of her head, pulling her more firmly against him. It was neither innocent nor passionate, falling somewhere in-between. Regardless, it was the sweetest and most true thing he had ever experienced. Reid knew without a doubt it was the best kiss of his life.
* * *
Elise pulled away, shocked by her own actions. She raised her fingers, touching her lips, needing to feel them and make sure what had just happened was not a dream. It was real, she could feel them, the ghost of how his lips had felt pressed against her own remained. Warmth suffused her body, and she had to restrain herself from leaning into him once again. Looking up at Weston, she felt the need to explain.
“I don’t know why I did that,” she said, dazed. “But I don’t think I regret it.”
