“It’s just so damnably infuriating,” Henry spat. “I never asked for any of this. I wasn’t supposed to be the duke. I’m not prepared.” Clutching his hair in his hands, he felt the tension in his shoulders crank up a notch thinking about all that came with his title. “I have so many people who are now relying uponmefor their livelihood, and I have no idea the best way to manage land or an estate. I don’t want to let anyone down . . . and my aunt will kill me if I harm the reputation of the family.” Having finished his tirade, he sank into the armchair, imagining what it would feel like to disappear and leave all his responsibilities behind.
“Hey, come now. It’s not all that bad.” Fitz leaned forward and placed a comforting hand on Henry’s knee. “I’ve been the earl for five years now, and I can help you learn what you need to know to manage the estate. I know you hate to do anything you don’t think you’re perfect at, but you’re learning. And the good news is that unlike many of your peers, you are actually in the black and have the funds to do things properly. Reid and Sidney will get you up to date with what is happening in Parliament before the next session begins. As for marriage, it’s not the death knell you all seem to think it is.”
At Henry’s exasperated look, Fitz raised his hands in a placating manner. “Alright, I acknowledge that no one wants to be trapped into holy matrimony, it would definitely be better if the bride were of your own choosing. But truly, I cannot imagine my life without Moira in it,” Fitz said with a dreamy look on his face. “She and our dear little ones have made my life immeasurably sweeter, and I only want the same for all of you.” The last was said earnestly, and Henry couldn’t help but acknowledge that maybe it would be nice to have a lovely woman by his side.
Reid laughed heartly. Coming to stand behind Fitz, he clapped a hand down on his shoulder. “I’m happy for you, truly I am. You know how much we all love Moira, and if I could find someone as sweet as her, I might be tempted to walk down the aisle myself. But you, my friend, have snatched up the only truly good woman.” Reid’s face turned dark as he then said, “With my odious father, I’ll not be subjecting any woman, even if I despised her, to the firestorm that is my family. And I refuse to give my father the satisfaction of knowing his line is secure.”
“It’s true you are not in the best position at the moment,” Fitz conceded to Reid, speaking carefully so as not to feed the dark cloud that now hung above the man’s head. “But Henry,” he said, turning toward him, “as much as you are currently resistant to the idea based on some overly pushy mothers, a duchess may be just what you need. Having someone to help support you as you bring your house into order is not the worst idea. Wouldn’t it be nice to have someone by your side to help you, and arms to hold you at the end of a long day?”
Henry could concede that Fitz had a point. He had been waiting to pursue a wife until things with his estates were more settled and he felt comfortable in the role of duke, but maybe it would be easier to adjust to his new role if he had the support of a good woman by his side. He pondered the idea while his friends continued to natter on in the background, and the more he thought about it, the more he didn’t hate the idea. If he could find a wife quickly, he could avoid the worst of the mamas who wished to climb the social ladder and would be all over him once the next season began. The image of Lady Harcourt came to mind as he thought about possibilities, and he shook his head to clear it, returning to the conversation of his friends.
CHAPTER9
Grace awakened the next morning feeling much better, having rested thoroughly for the first time in days. While she still felt rather fragile, she could tell that the worst of the megrim was over. Snuggling back into her warm blankets, she did not yet wish to get up, preferring to stay cocooned for a bit longer. She was not ready to face reality, and judging from the lack of light peeping around the curtains, it was still rather early in the morning.
Yesterday was somewhat of a blur, but she was painfully aware that she had, for all intents and purposes, practically split open a vein as she spilled all her secrets to Carrington. What she remembered most was not so much her mortification, but his kindness toward her. He truly listened to her in a way that no one other than Moira had for the past seven years. He also seemed genuinely upset on her behalf, indignant at how both her blood relatives and in-laws had treated her.
She reflected on how drastically her life had changed once her father died. Losing her mother so young and not having siblings; he was everything to her. She had been so naïve leaving Lady Evelyn’s school. Eagerly awaiting her come-out, she was comforted by the fact that her father was not putting pressure on her to marry immediately in her first season if she did not find a good match. He told her happiness in marriage, as his own had been, was more important than standing, title, or wealth. She had been looking forward to making her debut and having an enjoyable time at the balls and other events of the season with Moira.
When her father passed suddenly from what the doctors calledapoplexy, two weeks prior to the opening of the season, her happiness and youthful ignorance were shattered. She had been thrust into mourning, and it was apparent that her coming-out to society would need to be postponed to the following season. Her cousin, Edwin, had quickly moved into the house, merely tolerating her as he took over the estate. She shouldn’t have been surprised when he quietly arranged for her to marry one of his friends, Lord Camden, but it still came as a shock. It was an easy match in his mind, as his friend had been in need of a wife and was not picky, just looking to go about getting an heir. Having plenty of money already, Camden was not overly concerned with a large dowry, and Edwin could pawn her off for a reasonable price without putting a strain on his new coffers.
Everything had been decided without Grace’s knowledge, until she had been called to Edwin’s study on the one-year anniversary of her father’s death. He had informed her that, as her mourning period was now officially over, she would marry the Earl of Camden the very next day.
Camden had not cared for her one whit and seemed to only see her as a means to an end. She may as well have been a broodmare. After the marriage ceremony, there was no celebratory breakfast—he simply put her in his carriage, and they made their way north to his country seat in Yorkshire.
The next six years proved to be a test of Grace’s strength. She had no friends around to keep her company, and the staff would not get to know her, as they were scared to lose their place should they be too informal with her. The worst part was her new mother-in-law, the dowager countess, who had taken an instant disliking to Grace and saw her as an interloper in her domain. The dowager ruled the household with a steely demeanor and refused to relinquish any control. Camden seemed content to allow his mother’s reign of terror, so Grace had no role, authority, or purpose in her new home.
Grace had nothing to occupy her time, but her husband frowned upon many of her interests when she attempted to fill her time. He did not want her in the library, as he thought women should not be too educated, believing it led to discontentment. He did not like when she went to visit the tenants because, as a countess, she should not mingle with those below her own station. He also believed tenants should not become used to seeing their landlords too often, or they would start to take advantage of their generosity. And she was not permitted to work in the garden, though she loved plants and flowers, because he saw it as common and lowering.
For six years—until her husband met his untimely and violent end—she simply sat in the cold estate and withered away out of sheer boredom and loneliness. No one had ever been outright cruel to her; they simply ignored her, leaving her to molder away. It was as if the time spent there had made her forget who she was.
But now, back here in the South of England with her old friend, she could start to breathe again. Even with all the stresses she still had while working to secure her future, she felt a little more hopeful knowing that she had Moira on her side. It had been such an unexpected blessing to run into her at Hatchard’s. She had only been in London for two days when she ventured out of the house to find a bookshop, planning to indulge her love of reading for the first time in years. Seeing Moira there, the two women had embraced with tears after instantly recognizing one another, even with the changes the intervening years had wrought upon them. It felt wonderful to have a loved one beside her once again.
And now, possibly, the Duke of Carrington could be counted as a friend as well. It was still much too early in their acquaintance to say if he could be a friend with any kind of certainty, but he had been so supportive of her yesterday and had not hesitated to defend her against Thomas. She believed his offer to help had been genuine, not simply a hollow, polite gesture expected of a gentleman. Then, when she had been foolish enough to press her body to its breaking point with her megrim, he had been right there to assist her.
Grace had been in too much pain to truly appreciate his attentiveness, but she could not forget how wonderful it had felt when he picked her up and carried her in his arms. Blushing, she burrowed further into the covers as she remembered how instantly safe and protected she had felt with her face nestled into the crook of his neck, his skin soft and warm. While she had been desperately trying to keep the harsh sunlight out of her eyes, she had not been above exploiting the situation either. He smelled delicious, like fresh laundry folded with lavender and citrus, and his chest was firm and strong. She shivered at the memory of it.
It had been a relief when they entered the house and exited the bright sunlight, but Grace had known she only had a moment longer in his arms. Servants had rushed forward to assist almost immediately, but she was glad when the duke sent them away and carried her upstairs himself, giving her another moment in his arms before he gently placed her on the bed. The cool, dark room and soft pillows under her aching head had been a relief to be sure, but she would have rather stayed cozied up with the duke if given a choice.
Allowing herself one last minute to revel in the memory, she thought about how handsome Carrington was. She had a weakness for darker coloring, and his eyes were such an expressive and stormy dark gray. Sighing, Grace shook the image out of her mind and forced herself to sit up and start the day.
Not wishing to call a maid for assistance so early, Grace went about washing and dressing herself. She put on a simple day dress in deep navy before sweeping her hair up into a twist. Even though she was breaking mourning by attending the party and abandoning black attire, her dark dress should help her avoid suspicion. And while she did not love her late husband, she still wanted to be respectful, finally having a better understanding of him in his death. This did not prove to be difficult, as much of her wardrobe was made up of serviceable gowns of strong fabric in deep colors that would not show stains or wear. The dowager had controlled the purse strings tightly and made sure Grace only had clothing that was practical in every sense. Sighing at her rather dowdy reflection, Grace made her way downstairs.
CHAPTER10
Henry had woken early, having spent the night tossing and turning from the unceasing thoughts of marriage and Lady Harcourt. And rather than stay in bed, he went for a morning ride to clear his mind. The air was bracing and refreshing this early in the day, before any summer heat intruded. As his mount cantered along the trail, and reinvigorated by the breeze, Henry decided that he would use the next few days to learn more about Grace.
From what Grace had shared, Henry believed she possessed a strength unbeknownst to her to endure so much change and neglect since losing the protection of her father. Having been raised among polite society, she would have an understanding of the world he was now thrust into as an elite member of the peerage. The more he dwelled on it, the more he thought she could be an excellent prospect for his duchess. Returning to the stable, he took one last deep breath of the crisp morning air before dismounting the horse and handing her over to the groom for a good brushing down.
“She was good to me this morning, willing to ride even as I made her work hard so early. Be sure to give her an extra treat for her efforts,” he told the groom as he affectionately petted the mare’s nose. Smiling, the groom assured him he would take good care of her and treat her like a queen.
Taking off his riding gloves, Henry strode across the lawn toward the house. He hoped breakfast was ready, as he was hungry after his ride. While he enjoyed starting his day with some exercise, it usually left him famished. He was brought short on his mission, however, when he saw a gentleman stumbling toward the side door of the house, obviously returning to the estate after a night of drinking and carousing. As he strode closer, he recognized Moira’s brother, Thomas, the very troublemaker he needed to talk to.
“I need a word with you,” Henry growled while clenching Thomas’s collar, preventing him from moving into the kitchen.
“What do you want?” Thomas sneered, once again not realizing he was addressing a duke. Disgusted by the gin fumes wafting off him, Henry let him go abruptly. Stumbling around at the unexpected release, Thomas recognized him. Immediately attempting a bow, he tripped over his own feet in his inebriated state. “Forgive me, Your Grace, I did not know it was you. What can I do for you?” His attempt at saving face was cloying and further irritated Henry.
“You need to clean up your act or you will only land yourself in more trouble,” he sternly admonished the younger man. “I sincerely hope you were not preying upon any other unsuspecting and unwilling young women last night.” At this, Thomas’s appeasing manner faltered.
