It was something we promised we would put away and never talk about again. For me to throw it into Jesse’s face now was about the lowest I could go. The flames in his eyes quickly turned and as I opened my mouth to say something, to fix the damage I’d done yet again, he spun me around and flipped me over his lap, face down and ass up.
This position was easier to assume this time but even as he tore off the bottoms of my pajamas, I kicked and fought.
I was no match for him.
“I'm... Sorry. I didn't mean that. Jesse...”
The force of his grip on the back of my neck reminded me that he was a trained killer. With just a flick of his wrist, I could fall into the great abyss.
“Stop trying to make me hate you, Kat. It won’t work.” He spoke deliberately and clearly as he worked my ruffled underpants down and tore them off my ankles, leaving me bare-bottomed once again over his knee.
This time, I knew what was coming, and somewhere deep down, I knew I deserved it. I think I almost welcomed it. And when the first smack came, my entire body was enveloped, notonly in the pain of the blow, but in an explosion of heat and relief, like a breath held far too long and finally released.
Jesse’s hand came down harder than the first time, the impact driving the air from my lungs as I gripped his legs to keep from falling. The red searing whacks rang in my ears, sending bolts of ravenous pain down the backs of my legs. I could hear my own voice, screaming and crying, but it was detached somehow. It was like I was feeling the pain and witnessing the moment, but through the eyes of a different girl.
Four more smacks in calmly paced succession.
Each spank hurt more than the last, and at the same time, brought me more and more peace. I knew my ass had to be screaming red. I could imagine the swollen hand prints from the force of Jesse’s blows, but somewhere in the brutal discipline I began to welcome the next blow as he took complete dominion over me.
The smacks came in rapid but controlled succession.
Smack.
Smack.
Smack.
Like an exquisite new form of Chinese water torture.
Just enough time between them for you to breathe, and wait.I inhaled, and the tears came like the spring flood out of a long-frozen mountain peak, rushing to find the life-giving river below. Finally, I bellowed and raised my hips up to meet his hand, taking everything he could give me and demanding even more.
“Thank you,” there was a knot in my throat but I willed it to unravel so I could finish, “Daddy.”
And that is when it stopped.
Chapter Six
My heart was racing like a gazelle being chased by a lion, but the lion had suddenly stopped the chase and the next move was mine.
The weight of his hand on the back of my neck twitched and loosened ever so slightly, and I took it as a sign it was all over, at least for now.
But I was wrong.
Maybe the pain of the spanking was over, but something else had just begun.
“Baby…” Jesse’s deep voice soothed my ears as my whimpering sobs slowed, and I clung to his legs like a frightened child to her protective father. “I never meant to hurt you. Back then. You were barely more than a kid. It was my fault. I should have never let it happen.”
The fierce voice was smooth, but full of remorse. If he only knew how much that moment had stayed with me, how much I clung to the feelings he had ignited in me that night.
After Jesse, everyone else paled into insignificance. I hadn't had a boyfriend. I hadn't had a one-night stand. The truth was, I hadn't even looked at another man since that night and I knewI never would. I loved him and resented him in equal measure, because I could never get over him.
Our bodies vibrated with tension as I lay over his knees, desperately trying to figure out who I was now and what to do next. Maybe it was a minute, maybe only a few seconds, I'm not sure, but Jesse took over just as he always had.
The warmth of his hand covered the throbbing pain on my upturned ass, and he just held it there for a long moment. Then the hand that encircled my neck loosened and grazed down my back, taking its place on the other blazing hot cheek of my throbbing behind.
“You’re okay, baby. Remember, I promised to take care of you, and you promised to trust me. And, you should know, I waited for you. Like, waited for you in every way. There was no one else. It was always you.”
There was nothing to say as my belly clenched and the power of my own desire began to trickle down the insides of my legs. As if by my own sheer force of will, I felt one of his hands lift slightly, following the curve of my bottom down to the back of my thigh, igniting a trail of sensual agony as it went.
