Long streaks of purples and bruised peaches fading into ash, like a painting. I haven't seen a sunset this hauntingly beautiful in years.
I huff a broken laugh. It feels as though the universe is watching me fall apart and testing how deep I'll go.
I can go deeper; I'm a master at it.
I stare at it for I don't know how long, tempted to fall in the sand and become a statue. And just as I'm about to lose myself in it completely—
"Emma!" Ben's voice pulls me back to the present.
He's walking toward me in long strides, wind tugging at the back of his shirt like it's trying to bring him closer and he's carrying my shoes.
I glance down.Oh. I've been barefoot this whole time.
When I face him again, I brace.
For what? A speech? A confession? A thousand things I cannot handle right now because I'm a mess and I can't take another wound, and I might collapse if he reaches for me?
Instead, he drops to one knee silently, and his palm slides under my ankle to slip my shoe on. Then the other one.
I watch the way he moves, unrushed, careful, his big palm under my foot, and my throat catches because no one, not even my mother, ever touched me this gently.
I wipe my face into my sleeve, so he doesn't see me ruined, even though it's too late, and croak, "You didn't have to."
"I know, but I wanted to," he says, standing up, almost toe-to-toe with me. His eyes skim my tear-streaked face, and then—his pinky hooks mine.
I blink down at it, then up at him, my voice breaking. "I'm not in the mood for a pinky swear. Our pinky swears suck ass, anyway."
He snorts a laugh and nods. "Agreed. This isn't a pinky swear, though. This one is for the sunset."
I pause, squinting at him, and my heart does a weird, lurching calm when it beats faster while somehow slowing down.
"You... you remember?" It's a story I told him years ago, and only once, that shaped everything after.
His jaw tightens and he pulls me closer by our joined pinkies. "I'll never forget it. I saw it across the sky and knew it was going to hurt you. I hate that I can't stop it, but at least I can be here for you. You're not alone."
Oh god. I almost fall forward and tuck myself under his ribs and fade into him.
Then I notice the sun sinking behind him, oranges softening him into a burned outline.
"Wow. This might be the most beautiful sunset I've ever seen," I say, smitten.
He gently covers my eyes with his hand. "Then stop looking, jump on my back and I'll take you wherever you want to go."
I brush it away softly and sniffle again. "No, I love this sunset. I want to see it."
He frowns, confused. "You love this sunset?"
"Yeah. Half your pinky and all those years of misery go on pause. I think you're better than any therapist. Thank you, Ben."
I give him a broken smile, both of us frozen, too close and too far from each other, and then, like the universe can't handle silence when it starts meaning something, two guys zoom past on bikes, and the moment's gone.
"Yo! Everyone's at the tree!" one guy yells. "Wanna hop on?"
Ben waves, trying to smile, but I can tell he's slightly annoyed. "No. We'll walk there. Thanks!"
"Let's go." I nudge him forward with my pinky before letting go of him. "Mara's been hyping it up all day."
We both inhale at the same time, holding on to a myriad of unspoken things, and start walking side by side. The air between us is charged but quiet until I break it.
