By the time I turn, he’s back in his chair again, watching me, waiting.
I place it gently on his lap. “Open it.”
A flicker of curiosity crosses his face. He opens the bag, peeks inside, and his jaw loosens. Then he lifts out the tiny baby clothes, something in him breaking all over again.
"Wow..." he breathes, stunned, and looks at me. He swallows hard.
"I went all over town, because I wanted you to give them toLisa as soon as possible. I don't know if it's a boy or a girl, but she likes white, and you prefer grey." I pull him closer, my gaze unyielding. "It won't be easy, I'm sure, but we'll make it work. I love you. Every part of you. Even the ones that grew through someone else. It's still a miracle, Ben, and I don't want you to think about it any other way."
He sets the bag on the floor and cups the back of my neck, his grip strong, as if I might slip away if he loosened it.
"You're the best thing that's ever happened in my life," he says, absolutely stunned. "You know that?"
I squeeze his hand once. "I do."
"I'll tell her again," he says without hesitation. "About the divorce. About custody—"
"First," I cut in gently, finger over his lips. "You need to sleep. Come home with me."
He smiles, eyes glassy and tired, but finally full of light. "I want nothing more than that."
40
I wake up to the weight of Ben draped over me, the warmth of him settling into a bed that technically doesn't belong to him, but after the way he claimed me here last night, I think he made it his.
Yes, we could have gone upstairs to our bed—the one we're used to—but I brought him here. And then, even though I also have a guest bedroom, I asked him if he wanted to take me in my marital bed.
Monstrous? Maybe. But in that moment, it felt like the only right thing to do.
Now it's morning, and the light comes through the shutters impossibly bright—matching my smile.
His face is buried in my shoulder as he breathes steadily. He's been in deep sleep for the past hour I've been watching him. I gently brush his hair from his eyes and he shifts, humming roughly.
"I'm exhausted," he mumbles from his sleep before opening his eyes.
He kisses me and pulls the blanket down, his eyes snagging on my naked body. Then he drags a hand over his crotch and lets out a raspy sound of complaint.
"Damn it. I'm actually dead from the waist down," he mutters. "You sucked the life out of me, baby."
"I'm marking this day in the calendar," I joke. "I was goingto ask for another round?"
His brows flick up. "Mmm. Give me a minute to look at your beautiful face and he'll be ready."
I smile, running my thumb on his cheek.
"I wouldn't want Richard to walk in on me when I can't fully perform, though," he adds.
For a second, the humor cuts out, and guilt starts creeping in. Not that it didn't cross my mind last night that he could have come, but now the thought makes me pause.
Ben studies my face. "Are you scared he'll come?"
I let out a small, broken laugh. "I think it's too late for that. This isn't the worst thing he could've walked in on." My eyes shoot toward the door instinctively. "But no... I wouldn't want him to walk in now."
Ben watches me for a long beat, the teasing slipping from his face. Then his voice comes out tight, controlled. "Do you still care for him?"
I breathe in, slow, thinking about it. The corner of my mouth tightens. "Yeah. A little. I think once you care for someone, you don't really ever stop. You just wish them well from far away. Even if you don't think you do."
We both study each other without a word—each for a different reason. When I speak my voice is careful. "Will you tell Lisa about your divorce today?"
