I continue.“I kind of screwed it up at the en—”
“No.”The force of the word makes me start, but it also makes my heart beat fast and furiously beneath my ribs, especially when he follows up the outburst with a soft “You didn’t screw anything up, Jamie.I just… I’m—”
“Wes?”
Billie is waiting a few steps behind him, one fist propped on her hip, the other grasping the handle of the first aid kit.John must have given it to her, and I try not to think of what she and Wes are about to walk into.She grants me one more narrow-eyed look before tilting her head in the direction of the stairs.
“Yeah… Yeah, I’m coming.”Wes nods.We share one more second of eye contact before he clears his throat and pushes off the counter.
I can’t tear my eyes away from him.I don’t know if this is the last image I’m going to have of him, and that’s why I say, “Wait.”
He does.Instantly.Again.And now I need to scramble for a reason why I stopped him.Fortunately, I find it right in front of me.
“You guys should take this.”I pick up the map on the counter and fold it into thirds.“Since Laurie and I are staying with the others.”
When I hold it out it looks like he’s going to fight me on it.The map is one of the very few advantages we have at the moment, but then he takes it, and I don’t miss the way his fingers linger when they brush against mine as he pulls the paper out of my hands.
My fingertips are still tingling from the contact when he lifts his gaze back to mine and points his baton at me.“I’m not going to say that thing you told me not to say.”
I try not to smile and fail.“I appreciate that.”
He slides the map into his back pocket as he joins Billie and—making sure not to disturb the corpse at my feet—I exit out of the coat check to watch them walk toward the stairs.Wes moves slowly, purposefully, each step taken with care until they pause at the top of the stairs.I stop breathing when I realize he waits for three beats—I know what that means—but then he descends the staircase with those same slow, purposeful steps, Billie one step behind him.It’s only when I can’t see them anymore, when their departure isn’t immediately followed by a horrifying sound of metal puncturing flesh or a pained yell, that I let out the breath I’m holding.
“Jamie?”
I turn back to John, fashioning a smile on my face.“Yeah?”
Over his shoulder, I glimpse Laurie pointing above her head, tracing invisible paths on the ceiling, as Jennifer nods.
“Look, before we go upstairs, I just wanted to say…” John rolls his bottle between his palms—a nervous tick I’m starting to recognize—before he meets my eye.“I know I should’ve insisted that our group not split up.Maybe if I fought more, Dani and Colette would’ve agreed.”He swallows, regret etched into the furrow of his brow, and I’m shocked that he thinks this ishisfault.“I’m not like Wes or Stu.I’m not really the kind of guy who—”
“I like the kind of guy I’ve seen so far,” I say, and the way his blue eyes lock on mine, the way his spine straightens after my words, I’m glad I did.I don’t need my complex to be catching.I don’t want John thinking it’s a character flaw that he’s not like Stu, of all people.
“What I mean is,” he starts again, “I don’t think I’m a particularly fearless person.I don’t take a lot of risks.I’ve never needed to, you know?I plan things out.I stay in my lane.”
I had the feeling he was more reserved in comparison to some of the more extroverted suitors of the night, but it was his quiet composure that made me like him in the first place.
“But… Ipromise,” he says.“I’m gonna try to be a little morefearless.I’m gonna do whatever I can so we make it out of this.”
I nod, but still, I can’t help but look over my shoulder at the empty staircase.
The silky, ebony sheen of Laurie’s jumpsuit shimmers in my periphery as she and Jennifer move closer to the counter, a nonverbal indication that they’re as ready as they’ll ever be for us to move up to the next level of the club.The one that’s even more mazelike than the last two we’ve been on.
“We’re going to be okay, Jamie.”
The certainty of John’s words draws my eyes back to him, and the warmth of his stare dissolves some of the uneasiness.I said the same thing to Laurie, but John makes me believe it.I want to believe there’s another side to this, one where we get to have that drink and talk about this night in the past tense.
I just don’t know if this is that kind of movie.
CHAPTER 14
“I wish I knew how to slit you.”
—NotBrokeback Mountain
The mezzanine level of Serendipity affords us a bird’s-eye view of the dance floor.When I came here when the club was still Cravin’, the railings circling the open space allowed you a great vantage point to spot your prey.Back then, the predators were fuckboys and older men ready to feed on inexperience and female politeness.Now we’re dealing with a whole other breed of predator.
When we get up to the top level, we move to the booths that trail the wall along the front of the club.It has the best view.There’s a bar to our left where the men were served during cocktail hour, more booths sit against a partition wall on our right, and on the other side of the open space—allowing us a full view of the lower level and the staircases leading down into the basement—is a wall punctuated by five corridors leading into the back of the building.
