“You pulled it off,” I congratulate, clapping Finn on the back and rocking his big body gently back and forth. “She didn’t have a fucking clue.” I watch as a little stress leaves his shoulders, but then quickly returns when Blake’s face turns angry.
“Nope.”
Finn and I, both trying to suss out the problem, follow Blake’s sight line to Lexi, who stands beside some dude at the other end of the room. Honestly, Blake looks positively fit to be tied, and I should know because I’ve had the same constipated look every time Julia and whatshisname are cuddle-y and shit in front of me. It’s theI wanna fucking killsomeone face.
It would be a little more confusing if I hadn’t seen him sneaking out of the lake house with Lex on the Fourth of July. I know some shit is going down between them, but I haven’t asked him about it and currently see it as my job to cast enough doubt to maintain his secret.
Lexi, for as sweet as she can be, would absolutely murder me if I were the one to out her secret dalliance with the star quarterback of our school.
And it wouldn’t be quick—it’d be gruesome. She’s too fucking smart not to know all of the very worst ways to torture someone without getting her hands messy.
“Who’s that guy?” Blake asks Finn, his voice all growly.
“What guy?”
“Seriously?” he questions, frustrated. I laugh. I can’t help it.It’s like looking in a mirror, he’s so damn pathetic. “The one talking to Lexi.”
I shake my head. The three of us. It’s incredible. We’re all fucking pitiful these days, and we all used to be so strong. It’s amazing what the power of a once-in-a-lifetime girl can do. Truly.
“You’re fucking intense right now, Boden,” I suggest gently, trying to encourage him to rein it in before the whole party explodes.
“I don’t care.” He meets Finn’s eyes again, desperate. “I need to know who he is.”
“He works at the Hodge Clinic, dude,” Finn explains. “He just came because he’s been working a lot with Scottie.”
Blake nods.
Finn laughs. “You know you sound a lot like a jealous boyfriend right now, right? For a girl who won’t give you the time of day.”
Blake smiles, and I know the edges of the secrets it carries. For all intents and purposes, I’m guessing heisthe jealous but secret boyfriend. Or at the very least, secret hookup. Fucking hard to imagine with Lexi, but I’d say by the caliber of his glare, the lake house wasn’t a one-time thing. “We must not allow other people’s limited perceptions to define us, Finnley,” Blake says. “There are things known and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors of perception.”
“The fuck did you just say?” I ask, trying to follow his philosophical bullshit and getting lost somewhere in the middle.
Blake shakes his head. “Never mind. I’m going in.”
“You’re going in? What does that mean?” I ask, scared for him. Lexi is going to eat his fucking shit for breakfast if he fucks up whatever little secret agreement they have by outing their relationship in the middle of Scottie’s party. “What is he doing?”
“I think he’s asking her out.”
“Oh fuck,” I manage with a laugh, trying to play up Blake’s innocence with Finn. “Why do I feel like he’s going to crash and burn?”
“Because he is,” Finn says with a laugh.
We both stand there, watching from a distance as Blakeinterrupts Lexi and Hodge Clinic Dude’s conversation. It feels a little like watching a car wreck as his hands gesticulate and his face gives 99 of his 100 secrets away.
Lexi’s face doesn’t give anything back, which isn’t a shock, but in the grand scheme, I’m guessing neutrality is the best of all scenarios. It lacks blood. And gore. And Blake’s carcass sprayed all over the place. We’re too far away to hear what either of them says, but when Blake turns back around and heads in our direction, he has a big-ass smile on his face.
Mentally, I pat him on the back. I guess, this time, his bravado actually got him somewhere. I’m impressed.
I glance at Julia, wondering again if I’d do better to take the same approach—if I should just finally tell her that I’ve realized I’m in love with her. Whatshisface is still away, and I’d have time to prove my seriousness without interruption if I hid her phone…
It’s a path a lot of people would’ve already taken, I know. And yeah, it has merit, but it’s also such a shake-up from the status quo,andmy worst fears are tangled up in that route. What if she cuts me off completely? I mean, fuck, we’ve been steady best friends for nineteen fucking years, and then I’m justin love with her?If she doesn’t feel the same, she might not even want to hang out with me anymore.
“Holy shit, did she…?” I question, looking at Finn and wondering if we’re about to hear the news of a lifetime from the man himself. Blake Boden and Lexi Winslow, an official couple?
Finn just shakes his head. “I don’t know, man, but he looks thrilled.”
Blake comes to a stop in front of us, his whole body a picture of relief.
