“I’m ecstatic you’ve decided to join us again next year,” Cordero called out as we exited his office.
Kulti said nothing. It sent off warning signs in my head that Ipushed away until we were in a place where I could ask him what in the hell he was thinking agreeing to sign another contract. Silence was our companion on the way out of the building. He didn’t touch me. Didn’t tell me how much he cared about me. He didn’t even explicitly say he liked me.
But I guess he’d done enough already. Right?
We made it all the way to my car and got inside before I broke.
Turning carefully in the seat to face him, the side of my right thigh up against the back support, I gathered my words and sorted them as he watched me the entire time. When I was ready, I gave myself a pep talk and met his eyes. “Look, you’re my best friend, and I am so thankful to have you in my life, but you don’t….” I couldn’t say it. I couldn’t.
“I don’t what?” he asked in a cool tone, those clear eyes locked.
“You know what.”
He blinked. “No. Tell me.”
Yeah, not happening. I couldn’t even put the word in the same sentence with his name. “I know you care about me, but you don’t have to do all this. I can figure something else out. It’s too much.”
The German crossed his arms over his chest, his expression unforgiving. “It isn’t too much, not for you.”
There we went again. Sweet Jesus. “Rey, please. Don’t say stuff like that.”
“Why?”
“Because it gives people the wrong impression.”
Those jewel-like eyes narrowed into slits. “What impression is that?”
“You know what impression it makes.”
“I don’t.”
“You do.” Dear God, if this friendship continued, I’d probably have premature hair loss in no time.
“It isn’t an impression. I couldn’t care less what anyone else thinks when it’s the truth.”
Oh hell. “Rey, stop it. Just… stop.”
“No.” The expression on his face was determined. “You are the most honest, good thing I’ve ever had. I won’t deny it to anyone.”
Dear God. Panic flooded my belly. “I’m your friend.” I sounded timid, borderline panicked.
His forehead was as smooth as ever. Kulti looked more calm and collected than I’d ever seen him. There was no trace of anger or frustration on him. He was somber and serious and terrifying. “No. You mean so much more to me, and you know it.”
I opened my mouth and closed it, and suddenly I couldn’t be in the tiny car with him any longer. I needed out. Out. Right then. That instant. I needed to get out. Fresh air, I needed fresh air.
So I did just that. I got the hell out of the car and slammed the door closed behind me. I crouched down on the ground with my head in my hands. I was on the verge of having either a panic attack or a shit attack; I couldn’t decide which. My heart was hammering a mile a freaking second, and I was just squatting, trying to convince myself not to die from a sudden heart attack at the age of twenty-seven.
This was like the best dream and the worst nightmare all wrapped into one beautiful package.
I hunched over more and pressed the heels of my hands into my eyes.
The sound of the passenger door opening and closing warned me that my temporary peace was about to come to an end. Seconds later I felt the one and only man—the cause of why I was losing my mind—drop down in front of me. His knees hit mine as his hands came to rest on my shoulders, giving them a light squeeze.
“Why are you telling me this now all of a sudden?” I croaked.
His hands stroked down the line of my upper arms to stop at my elbows. “I won’t be the reason your career is blemished,” he explained.
The reason my career was blemished?
