Oh my God.
Just like that, I told myself to ignore the feeling in stomach and I did, mostly. I snorted, thought about hugging him for a second until I remembered he hadn’t showered in a few days, and instead poked at the spot right under his ribs where I knew he was ticklish. Once the tables were ready, I sat down between him and Eli, with Carter, Gordo and Freddy across from us.
I spotted Sacha three seats down on the same side I was on. I may or may not have noticed that he pulled out the chair next to him for the redhead before they took their seats. I ordered my food and tried to focus on the conversation around me—one was about Fruity Pebbles versus Frosted Flakes, and the other discussed woods used as guitar fingerboards. At one point, I noticed Sacha leaning forward over the table looking at me but luckily Eliza moved a split second later, blocking his view.
When I got up to the use the restroom after finishing my meal, I pulled my phone out of my pocket and started poking around at the screen like I was busy sending an important text message so I could focus on that and not the people I was walking by. Once in the bathroom, I used it as slowly as possible, willing away that crappy, unsettling sensation that seemed to jackhammer away at my nerves.
He had a girlfriend, or a girl he was interested in. Was that really so surprising? It shouldn’t be.
I wasn’t particularly stunning; I rarely put a whole bunch of effort into my appearance, and we constantly teased each other and talked about bodily functions. That wasn’t exactly screaming romance.
Fine. It was fine. Everything was okay; at least it would be.
I ducked out of the bathroom, heading back to the table with a headache. Unlike before, I trained my eyes on the wall ahead of me so that I wouldn’t look down when I passed Sacha’s seat. Was I being immature? Maybe a little, but I didn’t care. My heart was pounding, my head was throbbing, and I felt like a fucking moron.
The warm, firm grasp that landed on my forearm stopped me right when I saw the shaved hair on the side of Sacha’s head in my peripheral vision.
“Fight Club,” his low voice murmured, tightening his grip on my arm.
It took everything in me to swallow the bile that had mysteriously appeared in my stomach before I glanced at him, as blankly and indifferently as possible.Friends. We were friends, I reminded myself. “Hey.”
Those pale gray eyes flickered over my face, which I knew was smudged with eyeliner and slightly oily from how much I’d sweated throughout the day. My hair was a side-ponytail mess and there were also ketchup stains on my shirt. So, pretty much, I looked as attractive as possible…
To a blind man.
“Gaby, I want you to meet my friends.” Sacha said, watching me swallow hard. He started pointing at the four people surrounding him. “That’s Matt, Seb, Bianca and Liz.”
Liz. The redhead.
Reaching deep inside of myself for my inner adult, I pulled my arm loose of Sacha’s grasp to look at his “friends” and I waved. “Hi,” I greeted them, noticing just how fake the red color in his “friend’s” hair was. Who did she think she was?The Little Mermaid?
They all greeted me, but it was the final person who made my head hurt worse.
“Hi,” Ronald McDonald’s illegitimate daughter replied, blinking big, brown eyes in my direction. She had that kind of classic beauty that would give a photographer a boner. And perfect, clear, pale skin.
What a bitch.
“Your hair is so cute,” she added.
A big part of me wanted to say something really bitchy like “does it look like I care” or “go fuck yourself.” I didn’t though. But I really wanted to.
It was my period talking.Right.
I just smiled stiffly. “Thanks.”
“I wanted you to meet them earlier, but you disappeared on me,” Sacha explained with a smile on his face that made my stomach want to revolt.
I nodded at him, but it was so forced I’m sure my extreme level of discomfort had to be apparent.
Awkward.
I coughed and pointed down the table. “I’m going to finish eating. It was—” I nearly choked on my words because I was a terrible liar, “nice meeting you all.”
I didn’t even bother waiting for anyone to say anything before I was back in my seat, feeling like a complete fool. I knew how unrealistic it had been for me to say that I’d never have feelings for another man because I didn’t want the drama associated with a breakup ever again, but this was ridiculous. I felt betrayed and I had no reason to. I was just a girl Sacha had met and got along with because we were stuck on a bus on a trip together. That was all. My stupid fucking heart sucked; it strained in its cage while I sat there miserably.
I didn’t speak to Sacha for a week.
Chapter Eleven
