So why does she take another step toward me? “It’s just pregnancy hormones, right?”
I’m starting to sense she needs me to be the voice of rational thought. That if I give in right now, she’ll just hate me later. As much as I’d love to kiss Hazel senseless here on aisle six, I can’t bear the thought of her despising me. Not when we’re trying so hard to be good, platonic co-parents.
“Sure, blame the pregnancy hormones,” I murmur. “Whatever you need to tell yourself, babe.”
Hazel blinks like she’s just snapped out of a trance. It’s like watching the sanity sink through her skull and soak into her brain.
I hate fucking sanity.
“Right,” Hazel says, and takes a step back. “We should ask where the crib bedding is.”
“We should.” I can think of ten million things I’d rather do, all of them starting with kissing Hazel Spencer.
But instead, I move back. “Lead the way.”
Chapter 7
Hazel
“Can I help you find something?”
I spin around fast, dropping the book I’ve been holding. My friend and librarian, Zoe Cornish, swoops down and grabs it.
Shit. I knew this would happen.
“Since when do you work Sundays?” I blurt.
“Shanice asked me to switch this week.” Zoe blinks slowly as she studies the cover. Like a perfect professional, she hands it back without saying a word.
But dammit, I need to.
I also need a good explanation for browsing a book called Embracing Your Sexual Needs Through Motherhood and Beyond.
It’s been nearly a week since I threw myself at Luke in the aisles of Baby Emporium. I’ve been keeping my distance since then, but it hasn’t diminished how badly I want him.
Surely there’s a solution here somewhere. I glance at the cover of Embracing Your Sexual Needs Through Motherhood, hoping the answer lies inside somewhere.
Zoe’s still watching with curious eyes, so I stammer my best explanation. “I was just looking for books on the female sexual experience.” And yes, I know I could buy one online. But I wanted to browse before choosing, and no one I know works at the library on Sundays.
Except, apparently, Zoe.
“Oh, hey.” She nods at the cover. “It looks like this one got shelved in the wrong spot. It’s supposed to be with our maternity books, not human sexuality.” There’s a quick little pause as she watches me shuffling my feet. “Or is this what you wanted?”
“No—no, of course not.” I try not to blush as she takes it and tucks the book on the bottom shelf. That’s exactly where I got it.
But I glance to my right and see there’s an empty space right in the middle of a long row of books with more sexual themes. There’s Come as You Are by Emily Nagoski, PhD, alongside the seventies classic, The Joy of Sex. There’s even a book called, Becoming Cliterate: Why Orgasm Equality Matters—And How to Get It.
I’m staring at that title when Zoe pops up again. “That one was a Consumer Book of the Year award winner. Really excellent. The Emily Nagoski one is amazing, too. Have you listened to her podcast?”
“I, um—no.” God, I’m embarrassed.
“Hazel, it’s okay.” Zoe places a hand on my arm. “The library’s a safe space, okay? And look, it’s no secret I took a sexual journey of my own. You were there when I set out to ditch my V-card with Cal.”
“I remember.” I envied Zoe’s take-charge mission to shed her virginity with the town’s most kindhearted playboy. “I always wished I could be more like you.”
She laughs so hard she starts coughing. “Oh, God,” she wheezes. “The most glamorous woman in Cherry Blossom Lake envies the scrawny sick girl covered in scars—no, it’s all good. Stop making that face, Hazel. You know I’m in remission, so I can joke about it, okay? And I’m gonna help you find all the best sex books.”
“Okay.” I’m in this for real now, aren’t I?
