My heart sank for the boy who’d had to hear that bile. And who’d believed it. “You lived with her?”
“She’s my mother’s twin. They were always together, never married, either of them, and no other kids but me. Ma even let Blair name me, hence the name that was a jab at my absent father. Ma raised me, when I was small, but pretty soon she couldnae walk, and her grip had gone by the time I was maybe ten. Blair took over, and to whatever degree she kept me alive. But she dedicated her life to caring for her sister.”
“While torturing her son.” I kissed his hand. “You are a blessing. Your life is precious. I need you to know that. I’m going to undo everything she taught you.”
Under my ear, his heartbeat stuttered. “There’s something new she told me outside the meeting. That I was the child of rape. Able forced himself on my mother. I knew they both hated the Marchants, but not exactly why. That cut deep.”
God.“I’m so sorry. It doesn’t change how special you are.”
“Doesn’t it? Even with the way I chased ye?”
I followed his logic, building a picture in my head of what he’d handled alone at the care home. Age-old trauma meeting a new and shocking revelation. “That’s where your mind went? They aren’t connected. You used that kind of sex to keep clear of pesky feelings. Isn’t that right?”
Rearranging myself with my chin on my folded arms, still on his chest, I linked my gaze to his.
Kane slowly nodded. “In part. I still want to hunt ye.”
A thrill ran over me. “But not to hurt me.”
“Never. And only if ye want it.”
I did. What felt like forever ago, I’d bemoaned the fact I’d never had great sex. With Kane chasing me, with the dirty phone call where he’d directed my use of his weapons, and with our perfectly intimate nights making love, he’d given me everything I’d wanted.
“You’ve spent the night with me in a bed, staring into my eyes and telling me you love me. There’s nothing wrong with you, or what we do together. I love the hunt. I won’t give it or you up for the world.”
He took a moment over speaking, a strand of my hair twisted around his fingers as if it gave him focus. “No one has ever treated me as more. I was a nuisance, a burden, then a machine. A functional part, like you said I’d treated you. Tyler showed me my worth as part of his team, and my sister tried to show me she cared, but I couldn’t see it, or accept it. Until you. When we were in the hotel, I had this alternate life planned out. One where someone cared about me and wanted me.”
Emotion rushed. “Me.”
He kissed my forehead, his lips lingering. “Only ever you. I wrote it on your hip because I didn’t trust that I could say it.”
I’d been right. Those patterns he’d drawn on my skin had been words. “What did you write?”
“That I loved ye. Over and over.”
My poor, unbroken heart hurt for us both. “Then Blair and the care home happened.”
“I’m sorry, flower girl. I thought letting ye go was the right thing to do. It was the opposite. I’ll do everything I can to make it up to you. I’ll earn your forgiveness.”
I squeezed my eyes tight shut, opening them to tears. “Just keep loving me, because I am in so deep with you.”
He shifted to hold me at arm’s length.
Deep emotion flickered in his eyes.
“It’s true. I’m in love with you. How could I not be?”
Kane’s mouth opened and closed, his gaze searching mine. “For so many reasons.”
“No. There’s nothing that could’ve stopped me falling. You’re wonderful. You have a beautiful soul. That grouchy stonewalling? If we ignore the last time, it’s just a turn-on. You are a force of nature I had no chance of withstanding.”
He shook his head, one big hand coming up to hold my face. “I’ll learn to be all those things. I’d say ye could boyfriend-train me some more, but it’s my job to work on that. I’ll find a way to be what ye need.”
His kiss interrupted my shaky laugh.
“I learned the lessons. How to compliment ye, bring flowers, take ye out.”
“To show up in the middle of the night when I needed you.”
