“Then say it!” he shouted, eviscerating the remaining distance between us, his finger pressing into my chest like a steel barb. “Say what we are. Saywhat this is.Say it out loud so I know I’m not fucking insane.”
I opened my mouth. The words wereright there. “My father arranged my engagement. He’s holding everything over my head. I don’t want her. I’ve never wanted her. I want you.I’ve only ever wanted you… I love you.”
But my lips wouldn’t move. Because if I said it, I couldn’t take it back. Once it was out, there’d be no safety left. If my father found out what Sin really meant to me, he’d use him against me. He’d break him and I refused to let that happen.
So I stood there. Silent. Watched as the light died in his eyes. Sin blinked slowly, like he could still find hope, that maybe I’d speak, that maybe I’d still choose him. But I didn’t.
“Right,” he whispered, so softly it made my chest cave in. “That’s all I needed to know.”
“Sin—” My voice shattered on his name.
“No.” He backed away, hands trembling. “Don’t. Just… don’t fucking follow me with your silence. I’ve bled myself dry for the chance to be yours. Iwaited.I kept waiting, like an idiot, thinking you’d finally fight for me.”
“I wanted to. Iwantto—” I reached for him.
But he stepped back, just out of reach. Just enough to let the cold fill the space between us.
“You always want to,” he said, eyes glassy. “But you never do.”
A gust of wind caught the edge of his jacket. The streetlights flickered, casting shadows over his face.
“I can’t be your halfway thing anymore.” His voice barely held together. “Not when it’s breaking me. I need to bechosen,Theo. I won’t beg for your attention. If you can’t see my worth, you have no place in my life.”
I stood there, paralyzed, every word inside me dead on my tongue.
“Goodbye, Theo.” His voice cracked like dry glass. “I hope whatever you’re protecting… is worth it.”
Then he turned and walked into the dark. The embers of the cigarette he crushed under his boot extinguished like dying stars.
And I didn’t stop him. I stood there, frozen, under buzzing lights and fading echoes, surrounded by everything I was destined to inherit, everything I’d been raised to protect… and nothing that fucking mattered.
CHAPTER 20
SIN
“Why does no one want me?” I cried into Thalia’s shoulder with a whimpering exhale.
There was no dignity in it. Just tears and snot and my whole body shaking like something inside had been irreparably broken. Hours had passed since I left Theo. Since I told him it was over—whateveritwas. Since I walked away from the only person I had let close in years.
Thalia hadn’t asked questions when she found me. She didn’t try to fix it. She just sat beside me on the floor of my bedroom and pulled me in like she had always known this moment would come. And maybe she had.
“Why won’t anyone love me?” I choked out, my voice raw, my face buried against the curve of her neck.
My chest felt too small to hold all of it—the grief, the anger, the echoing ache that never really went away. I wasn’t just crying about Theo.
I was crying about every night I’d lay awake, waiting for a message that didn’t come. I was crying about the part of me that still thought maybe—just maybe—if I’d been better, if I’d been enough, my parents wouldn’t have given up on me so easily.Thatsomeonewould have stayed. Would have wanted to keep me.
Thalia held me tighter, her fingers in my hair. “He’s a fucking idiot for letting you walk away, Sin.”
A sound tore out of me. Rough and guttural. Something between a laugh and a scream. It didn’t feel human.
Thalia let out a small, sad chuckle. “Well. That was unexpected.”
I peeled myself off her slowly, dragging the back of my hand across my tear-streaked face. My nose was blocked, my lips trembling, and I couldn’t seem to stop shaking. I climbed up the bed and sat back against the headboard, knees pulled tight to my chest, arms locked around them like a shield.
“I didn’t even cry when my parents kicked me out,” I said hoarsely, staring at the dark window like it might give me an answer. “Didn’t cry when the money stopped. When they cut me off without a second thought. Or the nights I had to sleep in my car because I had nowhere else to go.”
Thalia climbed on the bed beside me, and quietly sat cross-legged. She didn’t say anything. Didn’t need to. Knowing she was there for me was enough.
