“And other things,” he adds, giving me a meaningful look before he turns to the fridge behind the bar. “Can I get you anything?”
I look at the couple again, my eyes drawn as if by a magnetic force. “Sure. Just a soda, thank you.”
I try to focus on the bar and Asbjörn pouring soda into a glass, but my attention keeps drifting to the scene.
Reading my uncertainty, Asbjörn says, “It’s okay to watch. If they wanted privacy, they’d be in a room instead.”
For the next ten minutes, I watch discreetly and sip my soda while Asbjörn goes to talk to another couple in hushed voices a bit farther down the bar. But it’s not just the scene on the nearby couches or the one on the spanking bench across the room that I watch. I try to restrain myself, but my eyes keep flicking to the man in the back of the room. There’s something about him that makes my breath shorten. Something potent and worthy. A strength and a stillness that makes me think of the snow-covered mountains at the fringes of town and the harsh winds outside.
He doesn’t look my way again, and I’m as relieved as I’m disappointed.
Lea, a bubbly blonde who was also here last Friday, breaks me from the trance when she jumps onto the barstool beside me. “Are you nervous?”
“Nervous?” I parrot, a bit confused.
She nods to my hands that are fumbling with my lip balm, pulling the lid off, pushing it back on, and scratching at the label. “I know it’s overwhelming. I mean, I was nervous the first ten times I came here. Still am sometimes.” Smiling softly, she makes an excited lift of her shoulders.
“Yeah.” My shoulders drop with the admission. I guess I’m more nervous than I thought. But not just for the reasons I’d expect. I watch the mighty man with the icy stare. A few other couples are on the adjoining sofas, but not a single person has tried to sit on his couch or approach further, and the other members seem to steer clear of the area as if out of quiet respect.
“Don’t worry; it gets better. Even if the nervousness lingers, the excitement grows. Especially when you find someone to play with.”
“Do you have a Dom? Or a play partner?” I ask.
She shrugs. “Nah, I’m just playing a bit with whoever is free. Sometimes, I join a scene when a couple wants an extra sub. That kind of thing.”
She says it like it’s the most natural thing in the world; meanwhile, I’m trying not to gawk. “That sounds exciting.”
She makes a cute little bounce. “It is.”
“Have you ever been to other clubs?”
“Several. But this one is my favorite. I knew it the first time I came here.”
“Do all kinksters look like this? I mean, do all Dom’s look like Vikings?”
“Nah, it’s just here.” She giggles and fiddles with a bracelet that I only notice now. A silver bead with a rune symbol—?—sits on a simple band of braided black leather. Feeling like I have seen it before, I glance at Asbjörn and find the exact same one among his many armbands.
I point to the rune. “What does that mean?”
Her smile widens. “Dagaz. It’s the old rune symbol meaning dawn. New beginnings.”
I study the symbol, oddly mesmerized, feeling a strange sense of connection. That’s exactly where I am. At the dawn of a new beginning.
“What kind of new beginning?”
“Long story,” she simply says.
I almost reach out to touch the symbol but stop myself. That’s when I feel that prickling sensation again. Lifting my gaze, I find the man at the back watching me again. His eyes drift over my face, down to my hands, then slowly, languidly, looks away again.
My breath catches and chills spread over my skin. “Who is that?” I whisper to Lea.
“Who?” Lifting her gaze, she follows my line of sight, and her voice fills with a sort of careful hesitation. “That’s Ulf.”
“Ulf,” I whisper, wanting to taste his name on my lips. “Who is he?”
“Um. He’s the leader.” Uncertainty flickers in her expression, and she hurriedly adds, “I mean, he’s the one people go to for advice here. But don’t get your hopes up. He’s looking for something very specific.”
“I wasn’t,” I say a bit too quickly, probably giving myself away. I swallow, trying to crush my curiosity, but I can’t help myself. “What kind of specific?”
