“I could kill you so easily,” my lover tells me in a low voice that somehow the wind doesn’t take. “I could shove you over the cliff anytime I want.”
“I know,” I gasp, my hands now on his wrist as his fingers slowly tighten to cut off my air.“I know?—”
“I could do it anytime. I could come in your greedy, messy cunt and then toss you over for the sharks to eat. No one would ever find you.” The threats make me whimper, and my eyes slide closed as black spots dance in front of them. I can’t speak anymore past the pressure of his hand, but I mouth the words again.
I know.
“You’re going to come right here, on the edge of this cliff where I found you the first time, Sierra.” The use of my real name sends a ripple down my spine, and my leg curls moretightly around his waist, my heel digging into his lower back to hold him to me.
“And you’re going to tell me you’reminewhile I make you come harder than anyone else ever could.” Even though he says so, his grip doesn’t loosen while he pounds into me. I gasp beneath his hand for air, my eyes opening to see almost nothing except the moon and clouds in the sky, blurred by my tears. Soft whimpers leave me as I desperately gasp for oxygen, and tears fall unbidden down my cheeks when I’m not given any.
But in spite of that, or maybe because of it, I’ve never felt more aroused in my life. Even without his fingers on my clit, I can feel my release rushing up through me with the same ferocity as the waves crashing against the cliffs under us.
The moment he releases my throat, I take a deep breath and air rushes into my lungs. “Yours!” I sob, not stopping the tears that slide down my face or brushing them away. My shoulders are shaking from how close I am to passing out, but as my vision clears, I find Larkin’s face. “I’m yours, I’m yours, I’malways yours,Larkin?—”
I come when he kisses me, with his hand still around my throat as a reminder, and scream into his mouth as he slams into me over and over again. The waves crash in my ears along with my heart, preventing me from hearing anything else.
After what might be seconds or minutes of me lost in the daze of my release and oxygen denial, I feel him snarl against my mouth. He moves to bite down on my throat and then sinks into me one more time, with one hand on my thigh keeping me pressed against him while he rolls his hips in slight movements against me, fucking me through his release.
But I’m only half aware of anything other than Larkin and the ocean. My hand comes up above me, and I let my arm dangle over the cliff so the wind can push and pull at my fingers. Dazeddoesn’t cover half of it, and when Larkin starts to speak again, it sounds like white noise in my ringing ears.
“Hmm?” I murmur when he turns me to face him with a hand on my chin. But Larkin doesn’t speak right away. He surveys my face for a moment before giving me a pleased grin and pulls me up into his lap, then stands with me again.
I’m boneless as he carries me back toward the trees, taking me to the softer grass before sitting down with my back pressed to his chest, his legs cradling mine.
“You’re perfect,” he murmurs as I sink back against him, relaxed and exhausted with my mind foggy in the absolute best way. “My perfect, sweet, silly girl. Mymonstrouslittle thing.” His hands caress my face and thighs; his touch is light and sweet.
“Thanks,” I breathe with my head tilted on his shoulder and my head spinning. Gazing up at the moon, I sigh, then close my eyes. “I was always a monster,” I croak, letting the words truly sink in for the very first time. “I was never okay, Larkin.”
He takes his time to answer, combing his fingers through my hair and kissing my cheek. “No,” he agrees. “You never were. But you never needed to be. You’re perfect, Sierra. And no mental hospital or different name will ever change you.”
Epilogue
The silence lasts, but I’m not really shocked. It’s what I expected, to be honest, now that I’ve come clean to Cass about the events of two months ago. My fingers tap on the kitchen island of Larkin’s cabin, and I keep part of my attention fixed on any noises I hear outside that would signal my boyfriend’s return.
“So.”That’s all I get from over the phone for a good minute.“It took longer than I thought.”
That’s…not what I expected. I blink a few times, trying to figure out what he means by that, and look over at the large saltwater tank on its stand between the kitchen and living room. “What?”
Cass sighs.“I expected you to crack a year ago, if I’m being honest. I never expected you to actually stay, uh…”I swear I can hear the dry smile in his voice. “Like Esme. How is she, by the way?”
“Oh, she’s good. She’s doing better. Even though she didn’t ask specifics about Flanagan, she’s not dumb. She knows what I did, and she still loves me for it, or so she says. Umm…” I glance up upon hearing the sound of a car crunching on the gravel ofthe cabin’s long driveway. “Maybe one day you can come visit me and meet Larkin.”
“Maybe.”Cass doesn’t sound particularly committed or enthusiastic, but he relents with a sigh.“Or you could bring him down here this summer.”
“What’s this summer?” My curiosity is piqued and distracts me from Larkin’s approaching footsteps. “Something with the guys’ club? Are you initiating some kind of annual board meeting?”
“No,”Cass assures me with a small chuckle.“Jed could never.”He pauses again, like he’s not exactly sure how to say what he’s trying to tell me.“Wren and Hazel got engaged on New Years’. They decided they want to get married this summer, on the anniversary of when he met her, chased her through the woods, and killed a camp counselor for her.”Cass sounds less than thrilled about this idea, but a smile twitches at my lips as the door opens, admitting Larkin with blood spattered across his face.
He leans in to kiss me, not saying a word when he sees I’m on the phone, and goes to the kitchen sink to turn the faucet on full blast.
“They’re getting married? That’s so sweet! I mean, it’s not unexpected. I just wasn’t sure Hazel did things that publicly.” Last I heard, her crippling anxiety kept her home a lot.
“Wren’s been working on it with her. They got a dog. Well, he got her a service dog with Sloane’s help. It’s trained for Hazel to help her in public, and fully certified to go on her trips with them. Once they’re back from Rome this summer, they’re going full throttle with the last of the wedding prep. You’re invited.”Cass’s explanation is clipped as always, though I can hear the undercurrent of approval there. From what I know, he’s always liked Hazel, even if he isn’t so vocal to anyone other thanWinnie. If anyone knows his secrets, it’s her, and I doubt she’d be willing to spill.
“Am Iactuallyinvited?”
“Yeah. You and a plus one.”
