“Going backwards in order to find a way to move forwards in her life, perhaps?” Angie turned the menu over. “Visitors stay at mine for all sorts of reasons. Holiday, family, work. They bring their life stories with them, and some like to share. Mattie seemed adrift when she talked about hers.”
That was food for thought. Talking of which, she should decide what to order for lunch before the kitchen closed. She studied the menu again.
“What have you decided about Oxford?” asked Angie.
Nell clenched her jaw. “I haven’t.”
“Do what’s right for you.” Angie reached for her backpack and pulled out a folded piece of paper. “Rosie left this for you. She doesn’t go to it, but said she knows Jac who runs it, and she’s fab.”
Nell took it from her. It was a leaflet for a local Sapphic book group. Books were her thing, but groups weren’t.
“I know it’s a big step, but at least think about it,” said Angie. “Get to know a few folks in the community.”
There was something a little bit thrilling about the idea. “I’ll think about it.”
“Good.” Angie jabbed her finger at the menu. “I think it’s a pie and mash sort of day. Comfort food to make up for the trauma of those damn brambles I had an argument with on our walk here,” she said, glaring at the scratches on her hand.
Comfort food sounded good. Nell needed more than comfort though. She needed a road map, a guide to supporting Mattie. But how would that work if Mattie continued to be in denial or refused to be helped? What would it mean for their fledgling relationship, other than Nell’s tender heart being broken?
Chapter 28
It’d been five days since the trip to Bath, and Mattie couldn’t wait to get home and video call with Nell. There was so much news to share. She pulled her scarf higher to ward off the frigid evening air, as she joined the stream of people on the bridge across the Thames. What sort of looks would she attract if she gave in to her inner child, and skipped and whooped instead of walking sedately? She grinned to herself as she imagined it.
Halfway across the bridge, Mattie stopped and gazed out at the unique view of St Paul’s Cathedral and the city. She did that every time now, imagining Nell was standing next to her, just as she’d donethatnight, when they’d admitted to wanting more than a no-strings fling. The same night as Jon’s book launch.No.The memories didn’t belong in the same basket. She needed to savour the night with Nell and delete the others. She shook her head, as though the physical movement could force a mental one. Then she took a photo on her mobile of the vista. It could be her screensaver, something to enjoy looking at when she was in Europe.
European correspondent. Her new posting. Walking across this bridge was no longer going to be a regular part of her commute to work. There’d be other bridges and other rivers, forsure. The Seine, the Danube, the Rhine, the Volga. The names tripped off her tongue, and the thought of seeing them all was giddying. Had Nell visited any of those places?
A sharp wind swept off the Thames. Mattie shivered and pulled her beanie down to cover her ears. If she hurried home, she could have a quick shower and throw a pre-made lasagne into the microwave before her video call with Nell. They’d only shared texts since Bath. Nell knew about the review meeting with her boss and had sent Mattie a fingers-crossed emoji alongside a red heart.
A little while later, Mattie tucked her legs underneath her as she got comfy on the sofa at the start of their call. “Hi, sweetheart. How are you?”
“Very well, thank you.” Nell laughed. “You’re bouncing around like Tigger. I presume the review with your boss went well?”
“It did. But we can talk about your day first.”
Nell shrugged. “There’s not much to say, unless you’re interested in a detailed analysis of the temporary traffic management plans required for the gas mains replacement works in town next month?”
She laughed. “Sounds...thrilling.”
“Told you so.” Nell leaned back on the breakfast stool. “So spill.”
Mattie saw her own manic grin on screen but couldn’t dial down her excitement. “My boss offered me a new posting. European correspondent.”
“Wow.” Nell’s eyes widened in obvious surprise. “Did you know that was on the cards?”
“Not at all.”
“I’m presuming you accepted?”
“Hell, yeah!” Was there even any debate? She was about to say so, when she logged Nell’s impassive expression.Shit. DidNell think they should’ve talked it through first? It hadn’t even occurred to her. “It’s a roving role, responding to events across Europe, but I’ll still be based primarily in London.” For the first six months, anyway. Better to keep that to herself for now, until she had a clearer idea how things might play out.
Nell smiled at last. “It sounds very exciting.”
“It won’t change anything between us.” Mattie sat forward earnestly. “We’ll just have more exciting places to visit. Strasbourg instead of Swindon. Rome instead of Reading.”
“Paris instead of Plymouth. Florence instead of...” Nell laughed, a British town beginning with F clearly eluding her.
“Folkestone. Felixstowe. Falkirk.”
