The pack cleared away after dinner in near silence before going their separate ways, Christian making the time to glare at Jesse on his way out. Whatever Dave thought about it, Christian evidently hadn’t forgiven him for hurting his mate.
“Karl,” Matt said quietly, when Karl was heading for the door.
Jesse got the feeling this was private, so he busied himself washing the big roasting pan that wouldn’t fit in the dishwasher.
“Get some sleep,” Matt said. “You look like crap.”
“Seen a mirror lately, boss?”
Karl had a damn good point. Matt had dark circles under his eyes, and his face was gaunt with strain.
Jesse didn’t know what Matt’s expression was, given that he couldn’t turn around without betraying that he was listening, but a moment later, Karl gave a little sigh and said, “Yeah, okay.”
“If you need to do a circuit or two, that’s fine, but sleep. I need you well-rested for what’s coming.”
Jesse’s heart dropped into his boots at the ominous words. Up till now, it had been a vague sort of threat, something directed toward him. But now… He’d put Matt’s entire pack in danger. And the worst of it was, he didn’t knowhow.He had no idea what he’d done to bring this down on them.
He bit his lip and kept scrubbing while the door closed quietly behind Karl.
“You’re quiet.” Matt’s voice, behind him, but not too close.
“Just can’t win. Either I’m always complaining or I’m too damn quiet.” Jesse set the pan on the draining board and turned to look at Matt, wiping his hands dry on his jeans. “Karl’s not wrong—you need to get some sleep.”
“I’m sure you could find a way to persuade me into bed,” Matt said, but the effect of his teasing words was ruined by the yawn that split his face.
Jesse smirked, but it faded as he watched Matt try—and fail—to blink the exhaustion from his eyes.
“Hot milk and a bedtime story, I reckon,” Jesse said. He took Matt’s hand, and tugged him toward the bedroom.
There, Matt stood in the center of the room, swaying slightly as his eyes drooped. For a moment, Jesse was lost—this wasn’t what he did, taking care of people. But he couldn’t leave Matt like that, so he started undressing him, then pulled back the covers andMatt flopped into bed. More like a pancake than a strong, sexy alpha.
Something in Jesse tugged sharply at his defenselessness, and he pressed a kiss to Matt’s forehead.
Matt’s hand wrapped around his wrist, then he instantly dropped it. “Sorry,” he said, eyes alert suddenly. “I didn’t—”
“Touching that way’s fine,” Jesse said. Because it was, and if he’d made Matt scared to touch him, he was never going to get laid again. Speaking of which…
“Move over.” He swiftly undressed and climbed into bed beside Matt. He was pretty sure sex was off the menu tonight, but there was always tomorrow morning.
The sheets were cool on his bare skin, but Matt was warm when he rolled over and lay half on top of Jesse, pressing a kiss to his lips. And then came back for more, until sleep was the furthest thing from Jesse’s mind. They moved against one another, no energy for anything more, but this was all he needed—Matt’s strength and warmth above him, his weight anchoring Jesse, and his breathing growing harsher against Jesse’s neck as he got close. A low groan shuddered out of Matt as warm wetness spilled on Jesse’s skin, and then Matt was saying his name, over and over. As if his exhaustion had torn down the last of his walls.
Jesse held him, and wondered why his eyes were stinging. He wanted this, Matt’s warmth, the safety of his arms, the way he said Jesse’s name like it meant something. Jesse closed his eyes, trying to let himself have this moment. Just this once, something good, just for him. But the second they were no longer moving, no longer kissing, his mind caught up to him.
He couldn’t pay the cost of this. He just couldn’t.
Later, when Matt was fast asleep, his breaths gusting against Jesse’s shoulder, another thought struck him. He hadn’t justbrought this down on Matt’s pack. Every person who’d been hurt in the town today was because of him, too. That little girl…
Jesse’s chest ached as he tried to hold in the guilt and the shame of it.
Chapter Twenty-four
MATT
Waking up next to a naked Jesse Turner was one hell of a way to start the day. Especially when Jesse was just as eager to be fucked as Matt was to fuck him. The only slight problem was that Matt didn’t want to let go of Jesse afterwards. He should be getting up, but he wanted to continue lying there, with Jesse in his arms.
It felt like he was holding back the darkness to come. As if, whatever happened, he could always have this—Jesse, making little unexpected sounds of pleasure, graduating to a full-body shiver when Matt mouthed his neck, until they were once again entangled in one another.
He thought about bringing up the conversation they hadn’t finished. About the pack, about staying. But Jesse hadn’t run. He was still here, warm and pliant in Matt’s arms. That counted for something. And right now, Matt figured the best thing he could do was give Jesse space while still being there for him.
