Later, I conceded that being rich wasn’t all bad. We’d had a long, lingering shower together and were propped up against mountains of pillows, wearing soft towelling bathrobes and tucking into full English breakfasts as autumnal sunlight flooded through the windows. I could get used to this sort of lifestyle.
He put his empty plate on the bedside table, and the reflection from his watch face danced over the wallpaper.
“I’ve been meaning to ask why you wear a watch,” I said. “Family heirloom? Or are your clients all traditional types who expect you to be wearing one?”
“Neither.” He paused for a moment. “It’s a way I can keep some of my treasure with me.”
Intrigued, I put my plate down and took hold of his wrist so I could get a closer look. Each of the hour markers on the watch face was a… “Diamond?Are thosediamonds?”
“Yes.”
I turned his wrist, watching the way the stones caught the light even through the face. I’d never seen a diamond in real life. Other jewels shone. Thesesparkled.
“They’re really something,” I said eventually, letting go of his wrist. “How many have you got?”
“Not quite enough,” he said, the usual answer from dragons about their treasure. He glanced away from me, then back again. “I’ve never told anyone what my treasure is before.”
My heart swelled. “I can’t tell you what mine is,” I started, wanting to give him something meaningful in return.
His happiness disappeared like a switch being flipped, and I replayed what I’d said.
“No, I mean, I would, it’s just—” I paused. It never got easier to say. Especially not to Nate, who had become so important to me. “You know I’m not a full dragon.”
He put his finger across my lips, silencing me. “I know you’re both human and dragon.”
I stared at him, wondering why he’d rephrased it when it meant the same damn thing.
“Don’t define yourself by what you’re not,” he continued, and then closed his eyes briefly. Embarrassment? “Sorry. Talk about overstepping.”
“No, it’s okay,” I said, and it was like something deep inside me shifted. I was still processing what he’d said when I realised I’d never finished my sentence. “The point is, I haven’t got a treasure. Just a general desire to guard the family one.”
“Oh,” he said. There was no disdain in his voice, surprisingly. “I’d ask what that feels like, but I imagine it feels normal, like having a treasure does to me.”
“I sort of know what it means to have one—like, right now, I want to drag you off to my lair and hoard you and guard you, so I get it.”
“You want to hoard me?” His eyes fixed on my face with a painful intensity.
“Nate, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m kind of crazy about you,” I informed him. Might as well go for broke, and it was true. I wanted—so badly—to kiss him. I couldn’t. I had to wait, to see if I’d moved too fast, yet again. “I know it’s absolutely the worst time, what with you and—”
That was the last thing I said for a very long time. Hard to speak when someone was kissing you as if their life depended on it.
When he finally drew away and looked at me, his eyes grew sad. He lay back against the pillows and stared at the ceiling. “You don’t really know me.”
“Not yet, but I know some of the important things. Like, you’re generous and thoughtful, clever, and you’ve got a great sense of humour—you laugh at my jokes, so you must have.” Shit. Way to make it all about me. “You’re kind, and you’re protective as hell when it comes to your brother. And yeah, I don’t know you all that well, and I want to find out all the other things you are—Ibet you’re annoying, leaving dirty socks on the floor or eating with your mouth open or something—but the things that are the core of you, I knowthose.”
He rolled over, reaching out blindly to me, and I held him as he pressed his face against my shoulder. I didn’t have a clue what he was thinking. All I knew was that he wanted to be held, and I wanted to hold him.
NATE
I’d had to hide my face from Alex. He mustn’t know how his words affected me. For so many years, I’d known I wasn’t enough. People only wanted me around because I’d learned how to make myself useful.
Alex had seen things in me that no one else had, thatIhadn’t known were there. The qualities he’d just reeled off had nothing to do with how many clients I brought in or how good a blowjob I gave. Being thoughtful or kind wasn’tuseful.
Everything I knew about myself was upended and called into question. I was lost, all my familiar signposts torn down by Alex’s words.
When I finally had control over my expression, I sat up. His eyes were watchful. No wonder—he’d put himself out there and I’d given him nothing in response. But I didn’t know what to say. I couldn’t do this again. The split with Charlie had crushed me. When Alex walked away, I knew it would kill me.
But what if he didn’t walk away? Perhaps I could have this.
