LUKAS
The thingabout being around Sawyer was that it was effortless. We talked all through dinner. Through the band’s first set. I’d been out with guys before, it wasn’t that I’d never dated, but I guess I hadn’t in the traditional sense. In the way Sawyer was probably used to doing things. The whole meet someone, get to know them, date them, and then maybe get intimate with them.
There was something to be said about anticipation. The reason I wanted to take it slow was because I wanted a more solid foundation. One that could bear the weight of my past. And maybe I was a bit scared that Sawyer would end up just like the other guys, and once he got what he wanted, he wouldn’t be interested in me anymore.
It turned out that the band did in fact know Sawyer’s favorite song, and when the opening notes played, he stopped mid-sentence and looked at the stage. He watched with rapt attention for a few seconds before turning to me.
“I think that’s the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me.” Sawyer reached over and took my hand. I laced our fingers together, tethering him to me. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that his bar should be a lot higher. The fact that he hadn’t been doted on by past boyfriends only served to work in my favor. The bar really was on the floor.
“Don’t go telling people that I’m sweet, though. You’ll ruin my reputation.”
With his other hand, Sawyer pretended to zip his lips shut. “Your secret is safe with me.”
We listened to Sawyer's favorite song with him watching the band and me watching him. When they were done, Sawyer leaned over and kissed me. It was sweet and soft, and it made me ache for him. I wanted to know if everything he did was that soft, that gentle. The idea of taking Sawyer to bed wasn’t a new one, and the more time that passed, the more I yearned to do it.
The band took a break and Perry hopped off the stage, grabbed a bottle of water, and made a beeline for our table. He glanced at Sawyer and our joined hands, and his smile brightened. It wasn’t that I was a hermit or anything, but after I retired from performing, my social life took a substantial hit. The guys all wanted me to find someone to settle down with. A few of the guys wanted me to get back into filming, but I’m sure their motives weren’t exactly selfless.
And then there was Perry. He had to be one of the nicest guys out there. We’d never performed together, which was something I reminded myself to tell Sawyer.
“Hey, Lukas. It’s good to see you out and about.” Perry cracked the lid of his water bottle open and then looked at Sawyer. “I hope we didn’t butcher your favorite song.”
“No, it was really good. I promise.”
Sawyer and Perry exchanged a couple more pleasantries before he made his excuse to get back to the band.
“He seems nice,” Sawyer said to me once he was gone.
“He’s a good guy.” I hated to admit it, even to myself, but it was nice to be out with a guy who hadn’t fucked all my friends. Did that make me a hypocrite because I’d fucked most of my friends at one point or another? Probably. But I couldn’t stop liking the fact that Sawyer didn’t have any kind of past with any of the people I knew. I liked that it felt as if he belonged to me. Like he was something just for me.
“So, your upbringing ruined live music for you, and now I’ve hopefully given you a new appreciation for it. What else did your parents ruin that I can help you revisit?”
Sawyer laughed but shook his head. “You already took me on the swings, which I hadn’t done since I was small. And now this. How about we work on one of your childhood experiences and make a better memory?”
“God, where to start? I mean, there’s so much that I didn’t experience like a normal kid.”
“Like what?” Sawyer asked gently.
“You name it. Birthday parties. Summer camp. Sleepovers.”
“Well, I’m not much help with any of those.” Sawyer furrowed his brow. “Actually, I do have an idea.”
He pulled his phone out and after a minute, his face lit up. He gave me a beaming smile. “Do you trust me?”
“Yeah, of course.” I absolutely trusted Sawyer. Maybe more than I trusted anyone.
“If you’re ready for our next adventure, I’ll settle the bill and then we can head out.” Sawyer waited for my nod then got to his feet. He paused to bend down and steal a kiss. He didn’t say anything, he merely smiled at me and then zipped away to pay for dinner. Which, I’ll admit, was a nice treat. Usually, I was the one to foot the bill, but Sawyer just jumped up and took over before I could argue. I didn’t hate feeling looked after. And eventhough I had no idea what Sawyer was planning, I found myself suddenly beside myself with excitement.
I waved to Perry on my way out and walked with Sawyer to the car. “Are you going to tell me what we’re doing?”
His answering smile was bright. “You’ll see when we get there.”
The drive to get there was about twenty minutes, which wasn’t bad, and it took us outside the city limits.
“I don’t think I’ve left town in months. Maybe longer.”
“I know what you mean.” Sawyer answered from the passenger seat. “I tend to live within five blocks of my apartment. Sometimes Thurston and Eugene drag me out to their house, but my social circle is pretty limited.”
“How did you come to know Thurston?”
