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Day 1
March 27. 2020
I open my fridge for the fifth time today. I don’t even know why. I’m not hungry, just bored. If I don’t get my boredom eating under control, I’ll gain weight during all of this, and also my food storage is starting to dwindle.
I’m on day ten of a shelter-in-place mandate from the Governor of California. There are only a few cases in my small town of the dreaded coronavirus, but just a few miles up the road, a few hundred have been reported, so they’ve put us all on lockdown to stop the spread.
I knew it was coming. As a sixth-grade teacher, I knew shit was about to go down when they canceled school for two weeks before the shelter in place was even ordered. Canceling schools is a big deal, so when that surprising announcement came, I prepared for more.
I stopped by the supermarket before I went home, grabbed everything I needed for two weeks, and planned on enjoying the time off by relaxing and doing whatever I wanted.
Yeah, that lasted all of about three days before I was bored out of my mind. By Tuesday, I was starting to twiddle my thumbs. Now that it is Friday, I’m itching to go out, but I can’t. Everywhere is closed, and when you live alone, you really start to realize how much you rely on outside interaction to keep you going.
My parents who live a few hours away have been checking in with me, and for the first time, I’ve felt it’s a good thing they divorced after I graduated high school because, now, I get two phone calls instead of one to keep me entertained.
That’s how sad my days have become.
I’ve tried to stay in touch with my friends, but since all of their children are home now, they’re losing their minds, and they can’t talk on the phone without having to yell at their kids, or it’s so loud that they can barely hear me, which ends in them feeling frustrated and having to hang up the phone. I’ve gotten joking texts saying,Send wine, from more people than I can count.
I decide to put mind over matter and shut the refrigerator door.
I. Am. Not. Hungry. I repeat in my mind.
Picking up my phone, I sigh as I scroll through Facebook for the tenth time today, seeing if anything new has been posted, when my notification dings with a message from Tinder.
I reactivated Tinder over the weekend after taking a hiatus. I figured my messages would be going crazy right now with everyone at home bored but that’s not the case. It’s like guys know they can’t get laid right now, so they’re not even putting in the effort. When New York City sent out a message that went so viral even I saw it here in California saying,You are your safest sex partner, I knew things were getting real.
I open the app and see I have a message from a guy named Drew. It’s been a while since I swiped right, so I click on his profile to see if I remember ever seeing this guy.
He only has one picture available for me to view. He’s wearing a baseball cap and a smile. It’s cut close and I can’t see his entire body, but he’s pretty good-looking, so I snoop some more to read:
Drew, 27
Ten miles away
Just a guy following his dream.
The space allows for a paragraph, so him having only one sentence intrigues me, mainly because I like the sentiment. I like someone who has goals and isn’t afraid to put them out there for all to see.
Since I’m bored, I decide,Why not?I open the message to see what he said.
Drew: Hey there. Are you bored like me?
I laugh out loud because he truly has no idea just how bored I am. I decide to play with him.
Me: I was actually just about to find a cure for cancer, but boo, I got interrupted by your message, and now, the entire thought is gone. Oh well. On to the next.
Drew: Nice to know I’ll go down in history as the guy who got caught up by a pretty girl and ruined all of humanity because of it.
Me: Pretty, you say? Do tell…
I’m shocked when I hit Send. I must be totally losing my mind because that is not something I’d normally say to a guy.
Drew: From what I saw, I’d say yes. Please don’t tell me those are pictures you found online to pose as someone else…
I decide to just go for it, showing him what’s really going on over here. I hold up my phone and take a picture in all my quarantined glory. Before I think twice, I hit Send.
