“But this is your solo,” I say, making sure she knows it doesn’t have to include me.
She gives me a coy smile. “I know, but it’s all about you bringing me back. I want you to have your spotlight in it too.”
I lean in to kiss her as my phone dings. It’s a text message from our publicist, saying they’re setting up a photo shoot for tomorrow. I show Sarah, and her face goes pale.
“What kind of photo shoot?” she asks.
“One of us that they’ll use as our promo shots.”
She glances down at her outfit. “What am I supposed to wear?”
I scroll through my phone to the picture Jack showed me of her last band and hold it out to her. “Don’t worry about it. They’ll have stylists there, but just in case, please tell me you still have these shorts and these boots?” I raise my eyebrows to her, making her giggle.
“Yes, I still have them.”
“Good. Then, it’s done. Wear those and hopefully they don’t have anything else that fits.”
I wink, and she takes the phone from me to examine the picture closer as she sits up, crossing her legs underneath her. When she runs her finger over the two guys in the photo, I sit next to her, placing my hand on her knee.
“You know they’re smiling down on you right now,” I say, kissing her head.
She sighs and gives me a small grin. “Just doesn’t seem fair.”
“Life’s not fair. I’ll be the first one to admit that. But things come together. You have to move forward.”
“You have to have faith …” she says, barely above a whisper.
“Nah, faith has nothing to do with it. You make your own destiny.” I stand up, heading to the kitchen to grab a water.
She follows me. “You really don’t believe in God or a higher power, do you?”
I take a swig of water, trying to think of how to answer this. I don’t want to offend her, but I don’t want to lie either. If I want to spend my life with her, I need to be forthcoming about my feelings on the matter.
I step closer and grab her hand. “Just like me being straight edge, I don’t care if my friends drink around me. That’s their business. I feel the same way about religion. But no, I don’t believe. If there truly were a God, then why the hell would he have put me through the way I was raised? Believe me, no God I’ve heard of would have treated a child that way.”
I feel her tense, so I step closer, putting my other hand on her cheek. “But just because I don’t believe doesn’t mean I think you’re crazy that you do. If that’s how you feel, I’d never fault you for that, just like I hope you wouldn’t fault me for my feelings.”
She takes a deep inhale and stares into my eyes. “It breaks my heart to hear you say this. Not for my beliefs though, but for you. You’re right. No kid should have gone through that, and I hope, one day, you can forgive and open your heart.”
“I don’t need to forgive. My mom’s dead. My life changed the day Cailin was born. She’s my true angel, and now that I have you, my heart is full.”
She grips my hand tighter, making sure I don’t walk away. “If you believe a god punished you with an imperfect childhood, do you think you can also credit him with a perfect daughter? He gives life. He doesn’t tell us how to love that life. That we do on our own. All you need is faith.”
I take in what she said, thinking about her words and beliefs, but decide this is not a conversation we should have all at once. I’ve told her my feelings. Instead of stating them again, I kiss her forehead and turn to grab my water once more, hoping I didn’t just upset her with my truth.
* * *
Linda agrees to watch Cailin after school, so we can head to the photo shoot. My eyes keep roaming to Sarah’s legs in the seat next to me.
Those short shorts and high gray boots are officially my kryptonite, and I have to remind myself to keep my eyes on the road.
I run my fingers up her thigh, and she laughs, pushing me off her, knowing exactly what my intentions are.
When we arrive at the spot, I put the car in park and lean over, needing at least one taste of her before I exit.
Fuck, is that a mistake. Now, my cock is rock hard and pushing uncomfortably against my jeans.
I lean back only slightly to inhale a deep breath and about come in my pants when Sarah grabs my dick, rubbing softly up and down.
