I take a deep, shaky breath, trying not to lose my cool in front ofher.
“Thank you for everything—for Mia, for loving me, for giving me the best life I could have lived. I owe everything toyou.”
I can’t fight it anymore and I lean in, kissing her lips with everything I have. Needing to feel her next to me, I slip off my shoes and crawl into bed. I wrap my arms around her, holding her tightly, as I love on my wife for the lasttime.
There’s a soft knock on the door and I have to gather myself before I can respond. “Come in,” I finally getout.
“I’m so sorry but Mia fell asleep, and I thought Mackenzie would want to hold her one lasttime.”
A sob escapes me as Jean places Mia down between us, kisses her daughter’s forehead, andleaves.
Mackenzie leans down, placing her lips to mine while wrapping her hand around Mia, holding her closely as she drifts off tosleep.
Epilogue
Connor
Five yearslater
“Daddy, I’m ready,”Mia calls from down thehall.
It’s her bedtime, and our evening routine is the favorite part of myday.
I enter her room, which is covered in Disney princesses. In the middle of a tiny bed with a sheer canopy falling around it is my own littleprincess.
She pats the spot next to her, and my heart melts. I never would have thought I’d find so much happiness in being a dad, but I trulyhave.
Her eyes are exactly like Mackenzie’s and the way her brown hair falls softly past her shoulders does me in everytime.
Next to Mackenzie, she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. She’s brought me more joy than I could ever imagine, and my life is absolutely complete just with her init.
Of course I’d give anything to have Mackenzie back, but our life has been one that I could have never dreamedof.
My boss kept his word about holding my job, and even made it possible for me to work from home. I only have to travel to the city once or twice a week for meetings but otherwise I get to be here withMia.
Both Jean and my mom take turns watching Mia, and of course Tracy is here every chance shegets.
Today was her first day of kindergarten and with our entire family on both sides there to watch her walk into the classroom like a big girl, I had to choke back tears. She’s so lucky to have so many people in her life, cheering heron.
She’s not just a normal daughter or even a normal five-year-old. She’s our hope, our connection toMackenzie.
“Do you have the letter?” I ask, sitting next to her and pulling her into my arms. I love how tiny she is and how perfectly she fits curled up againstme.
“It’s right here.” She reaches under her pillow and pulls out a letter that’s been opened and folded so many times, the paper is worn andsoft.
I should transfer it to another piece of paper to protect this one, but every time I suggest it, she comes back with, “But that’s not the one Mommyheld.”
I can’t fight that logic. This is the letter I gave Mackenzie all those years ago on the day of her babyshower.
After Mackenzie passed, we found a box full of things she wanted Mia to have. In it was a diary that dated all the way back to the day we met, turned into letters specifically forMia.
I sat, night after night, reading it until I laughed or cried myself to sleep. Of course there were a few pages I removed that aren’t fit for Mia to read—ever, but I’ve kept them close to my heart for yearsnow.
The best part of the box was the videos she made for Mia. We get to enjoy them everynight.
I’m lost in staring at my beautiful daughter when she laughs, nudging my shoulder. “Daddy, why aren’t youreading?”
“You know, you’ll be reading this to me by the end of theyear.”
