“We estimate it is unlikely with just one of us present.”
Estimate.I put the necklace around my neck. “Thank you, Frankie.”
“Did you get your cover story?” Timothy asks.
“Yes, and I have a house waiting in Denver.” I’m worried about how much of a guarantee that is, but I won’t know for sure until I get there.
We go to pick up supplies for my journey, but nothing that might be associated with Florence. Based on the note I got from Zac, I should pretend to be a messenger for hire, working for different gangs that want to pass messages without revealing their location.
Back at the mayor’s house, we have dinner that Buck cooks. Since I’m too stressed, I end up going to my room early. I’m to leave at first light if I wish to make it to Denver by evening.
I lie in bed with the bedside lamp on, trying to focus on my breathing so I can fall asleep, but it doesn’t work. I’m like a taut wire, ready to snap. A voice in my head urges me to reconsider my decision. There must be a safer way to help Caden without surrounding myself with the same people I vowed to stay away from. Old and painful memories resurface, of burned-down towns and so many unnecessary deaths.
I wish to be braver, but my fear is growing faster than my bravery until cold sweat breaks across my skin. I barely notice the knock on the door. “Yes?”
Josh enters. “Still up?”
“I can’t sleep.”
He climbs into my bed and lies down. I turn onto my side to face him, incapable of hiding my fear. Or is it panic? Yes, I think that I’m panicking.
“A few nights after Ruben died during Skyfall, I couldn’t sleep,” Josh says. “I went to Caden’s room so I could sleep in his bed. I used to do that when I was little. He let me lie next to him, and I asked him what we were supposed to do now, because Unity was like an open wound, with everyone grieving and expecting another attack.”
“What did he say?”
“That we first need to get our shit together, then we must fight harder and take the war to them. He was going to join the Defenders, he said, and every single day, he was going to kill those who killed his brother until none of them were leftbreathing. It scared me to hear how committed he was to war, like it was our only option. Our destiny.”
“Isn’t it?”
“No. War is nobody’s destiny. I can’t think of a more miserable existence.” He takes a breath. “But I understand now what he meant that night about killing everyone who killed his brother. If… if they kill Caden, I won’t stop until I kill every one of them. That is why I need you to save him, so I won’t have to kill for the rest of my life.”
I slide closer to him, feeling braver and even more committed. “I promise, Joshy.”
“Are we all sleeping with Finn tonight?” River asks from the doorway, Timothy in his arms.
“I don’t mind,” I say, since the bed is big enough.
I lie comfortably between River and Josh, with Timothy at the edge of the bed. We turn off the light, and at least for tonight, I feel safe.
Chapter 19
Finn
I ride fast throughout the following day, focusing on not getting lost since I hate the thought of sleeping outdoors alone at night. When I get close to Denver’s main gate, the sun is already setting. I’m surprised to see so many drones flying above. The guards also seem more organized and well-armed than I remembered, and even their green uniforms are clean. With Denver being so large, they never bothered putting up a massive wall around it, but they do have patrols around the clock and other defenses, some easier to spot than others. I remember hearing about a mile-long minefield to the west.
I climb down from my horse and walk toward the checkpoint. My clothes are plain and a bit dirty to make it look like I’ve been on the road for days. I nod at one of the guards. “Evening.”
“Where you heading, kid?”
“Westwood. Going home.”
“Where’ve you been?”
“Work.”
He gives me a once-over. “Which gang?”
“All gangs. I’m a messenger. You pay, I work.”
