“Lost your room?” I ask.
“Shut the door, Finn.”
“Why?”
“I don’t want others to catch me staring at your pretty nipples.”
With my face getting warm, I turn around to shut the door, but it needs some wiggling before I finally get it to fully close. As I begin to turn around, I feel Caden behind me. I tense when he touches my back, tracing my large tattoo with his warm fingers. Getting that tattoo was one of the most painful experiences of my life, but every Raider must get one. A dark skull covers half of my back while guns are under each of my shoulder blades. I don’t mind him touching me there because I never chose to get that tattoo, so I’m not ashamed of it.
“Otto has a thing for you,” Caden says.
“He doesn’t.”
“I can tell.”
“Then maybe I should spend the night with him.”
“Would you like to spend the night with him instead of me?”
“Who said I want to spend the night with you?”
He leans his chin on my shoulder, his stubble brushing against my cheek. “You wanted me here for a reason.”
“For protection.”
“Bullshit.” He places his palms on my waist, above the towel that rests loosely on my hip bones. He kisses the side of my neck, raising goosebumps across my arms. “There’s something on you that’s getting in my way.”
It doesn’t take a genius to see where this is going, but I can’t pretend our problems can be fixed by sex, nor do I want it to become the only thing between us.
“I’m tired,” I say and turn around.
He narrows his eyes. “Why do I get the feeling you didn’t expect me to be all over you during this mission?”
“We’ve barely spoken in months. I don’t want to pretend like everything’s fine.”
“I’m not trying to pretend, but fine. I would still like to spend the night.”
I nod. “I’d like that too. Right after you take a shower. You smell like your horse.”
“Ouch.”
I get dressed while he’s gone, my heart beating faster knowing we’re about to share a bed again. We used to share a sleeping bag during our journey back from Kansas. It was awkward having our limbs all tangled, yet I slept better than ever, safely wrapped in his arms.
Caden returns and puts his things on the floor, his hair almost black when damp. He turns off the light, leaving stripes of moonlight shining through the blinds. We both lie down, and before I can decide how to position myself, he pulls me gently to rest my head on his chest.
I don’t know where Timothy is, but I appreciate him giving me this space.
“I didn’t mean to send mixed signals,” I say.
“You didn’t, but try to be less of a Finn about this.”
“Less of a Finn?”
“Don’t overthink things. We have this opportunity to figure things out.”
“I'd like that.”
“Good. Are you warm enough?”
