“It was hell,” he said flatly. “A nightmare that I need to work through. When I have a bit more distance from what happened, I’ll share more with you. That’s a promise.”
“Okay. I won’t push. But what about your career? Do you think you’ll find work in Phoenix?”
“The force there would love to have me back.”
“It won’t be as exciting as LA.”
“True, which means we’ll need to have more sex.”
“I don’t follow your logic, but I’m sure it makes sense to you.” I held up the photo of a house with a white porch and tall windows. “I like this one.”
“Well, shoot, that’s the most expensive one.”
“I don’t come cheap, mister.” I put the photo down and ran my fingers over it, trying to picture myself living in that house. I couldn’t quite make it work, but I was willing to keep trying. “You’ll need to be with me when I tell Jenny.”
“You play a dirty game, Jonah. Is that a yes, then?”
I watched the setting sun, just as I had done countless times from my fortress of solitude. I was scared of risking what little I had, but I couldn’t think of a risk more worth taking.
“It’s a yes,” I said, and the world felt bigger.
EPILOGUE
2007
“When is it going to start?”
“Any minute now.”
“It’s been a minute since the last time you said that. And where are the other kids?”
“Princess, I warned you it wouldn’t be your kind of thing.” I look around, and sure enough, Maya’s the only child in the small theater.
“I want to see Jonah act!”
“And you will, in a minute.”
She grunts and crosses her arms.
DespiteDeath of a Salesmannot being appropriate for her age, having her here helps keep my nerves under control. I was the one to suggest that Jonah should try out for a local theater group. He firmly refused, but a few weeks later, he announced that he’d gone to audition and was offered a role inDeath of a Salesman. It was the role of the son, Biff, Jonah’s favorite character in the play.
“There he is!” Maya squeals next to me.
I follow the direction of her finger, and sure enough, Jonah’s curly head pokes between the curtains, his eyes darting around the room. He’s nervous; I can tell with a single glance.
“Wait here,” I tell Maya, hoping she’ll listen. I only need to make four people stand before reaching the narrow path leading to the stage. I climb onto it and make my way backstage.
“You can’t be here,” Jonah says as he walks toward me, slightly limping from that damn bullet. Behind him, actors and crew members are finishing getting ready. I smile at Jonah’s costume—a farmer’s clothes, down to the dirty work boots.
“You look great.” With his baby face and curly hair, he makes for the most adorable farmer.
“Thanks, but you still shouldn’t be here.”
“Why are you nervous?” I ask instead.
“Why am I nervous? You know why.”
His face is pale, his brow damp beneath a thin layer of makeup.
