Isla chewed on her bottom lip. “It’s more than that though, isn’t it? If he gets your powers, he would then be a threat to the entire realm—not just to you. So no, I don’t think that’s what makes you selfish.”
“Hmm,” was Jade’s only response. Isla wondered if Jade picked up on the intentional way she’d worded her answer. Truthfully, Isla didn’t know how she felt about the elementals and their actions. It was hard to disassociate her memories of laughing and drinking and eating chocolate around a campfire with them from the fact that they were eternal beings with a somewhat morally gray past. She knew they weren’t completely benevolent “gods” who only did things out of the goodness of their hearts, but they also weren’t self-serving and cruel, with no regard for the lives of others. They occupied an ambiguous space in between.
Maybe there was no absolute right or wrong, no black-and-white answer. Who was she to say that the world would’ve been better off with or without the elementals and their power? Whether or not it was for the best, the realm had still been forged from their works, molded by their actions.
“Why did you offer to do it, Isla? That’s not something we would have ever asked of you.”
Isla bristled. She couldn’t read Jade’s tone but, for some reason, the question put Isla on the defensive. “I don’t want your power, if that’s what you’re thinking. I’m nothim. I just want to help, and this is the best way.”
Nodding, Jade said, “No, I don’t think you are like the king at all. I think you are like us, in a way.” Isla’s eyes widened.
“Back in the beginning, mere centuries after we arrived on this plane and were tasked with nourishing the land and building kingdoms, I naively thought the worldowedme something because they needed me so desperately, and I helped them. They never had to ask. I chose to use my power over the earth for good—to save them, to bring life and abundance instead of destruction, to keep them fed and healthy and stable. And over time, I felt that I should be praised for this. I wasowedtheir gratitude, simply for being who I was.” She scoffed lightly. “That is a very dangerous way of thinking.
“And when the humans began taking us for granted, thinkingtheywere the ones responsible for how much they were thriving, thinking they didn’t need us…suffice it to say, I didn’t take that well. I did things I’m not proud of, Isla. Things I don’t speak of anymore. Then Celesine began to visit me; every few years she would appear, always when I was at my lowest. She heard my pain, let me feel my anger, then picked me back up. She taught me to have a better perspective toward humans. I actually wanted to see them grow and survive on their own, without using me as a crutch. Before that, I’d been so dependent on them needing me. On being their savior.
“Was that such a bad thing, to want to be their savior? I don’t know. I think when I let it consume me, let it lull me into a false sense of entitlement and turn a blind eye to what truly mattered, it was.”
Isla shifted away to face the hot springs. She didn’t know what the point of this story was, what Jade wanted her to see. She wasn’t anything like the elementals; she simply wanted to help her family.
Jade’s voice sounded further away. “Be careful, Isla. You cannot always be the savior, as much as you may think you need to be.”
Isla’s nostrils flared. She didn’t want to be the “savior.” What right did this elemental have to—
But when she turned to respond, Jade had vanished. Isla was alone in the clearing, with nothing to keep her company but shadowed thoughts in her head and whispers of the stars.
Chapter Forty-Two
Aidan
Hefoundherintheir cave. She sat on the cold ground in front of a small fire, the light dancing in her eyes as she stared into it, her head propped up on her knees.
The moment Bri had thrown out the idea that they could bemortal, he’d known. Kai had frozen beneath his touch, not even breathing, the canister of water slipping through her fingers. The look she’d given him right before she ran had speared through his gut. He wouldn’t have been able to decipher the emotions in that one glance if it had been anyone else, but he knew his wife.
She’d been shocked, obviously, but also fearful and a bit guilty. None of the others ever knew of her desire to join the human world, or what she’d done a thousand years ago in pursuit of this dream. Aidan was the only one she’d confided in, and he wasn’t sure how he felt about all of it. And beneath that, simmering and boiling within her eyes, washope. Hope that burned so bright, it knocked the breath from him.
He’d always thought he would do anything for Kai. She was the reason he lived, the very beat of his heart. Even if she’d never fully admitted her longing to be mortal, a part of him had always known something was missing. It was impossible to be so in love with someone for centuries and not notice they were passing through life unfulfilled, like they were staring through a window instead of walking through doors. He’d been more than happy to listen and comfort and dream with her over the past days as she’d expressed those feelings more and more to him.
Before, they’d only been a fantasy.
But now?
If she chose to give up her immortality, he didn’t know if he could follow.
“How’re you doing, sweetheart?”
Kai faced him, her eyes slightly glazed over. “It was real. This whole time, it was real,” was all she said.
She was talking about the artifact, the one King Medes had held over her head like a guillotine in exchange for her aid in the war. Aidan had almost forgotten about it with everything going on around them—but it had existed all along.
“Come here,” she sighed, patting the stone next to her. He sat, flicking his fingers at the fire to stoke the flames. “I’m insane, aren’t I.” It wasn’t a question. “This is just…I can’t believe it’sreal. After all my time searching for it. But it’s so much bigger than me now, isn’t it? We don’t know what would happen if any of us lost our powers. The world has never gone without us—even when we were sleeping, we stillexisted.” She shook her head and laughed bitterly. “Gods, that sounds so self-righteous.”
Aidan put a finger under her chin and turned her head toward him. He didn’t know what it would mean for him—forthem—but the desire and pain warring on her face made him want to give her the world. “Stop that. Don’t consider those consequences yet. We can figure all that out later. What is it thatyouwant, right now? If nothing else mattered?”
A tear made its way down her cheek, and he leaned in to kiss it away, the salt of it like the sea on his lips.
She took a minute to respond. They sat there with the fire snapping and heating their sides, so close he could feel her breath on his skin. Finally, she swallowed and said, “I can’t live without you, Aidan. I want forever with you, even if forever isn’t as long as it used to be. But…you know what this means to me.”
And there it was. The unspoken question she’d never once posed to him, but he could see swimming in her eyes.
