“I guess you’re just going to be a nigga with a dream.”
“Fuck is that supposed to mean?” I snapped.
His mouth was becoming a problem. Yeah, I wanted the studio time, and yes, I wanted to make shit shake, but just as I moved with Dio, I was going to move with him.
Beans turned to look at me. “If you think you're going to lose, then you will. If I didn’t think you had it in you, we wouldn’t be here. My words sound fucked up, but it’s the truth. Nobody wants to hear the truth, even a nigga like me. Now, come on.”
It felt good to hear him say he believed in me. I’ve never gotten that before, and the dim light that I felt before he said those words was now shining. A nigga was ready. Tonight wasn’t about proving something to Beans, but to myself. This shit was about conquering the naysayers. The ones that didn’t believe I was worthy of anything but three hots and a fucking cot.
My talent has been with me since birth, and if I didn’t believe in my abilities, who would?
BEANS
PRESS PLAY
I flicked my hoodie up as we entered the building. It had been a while since I’ve stepped into one of these sessions. After the last incident, I fell back. I thought shit was sweet, but unbeknownst to me, the person I brought was tied into some shit that got him locked up. Shit was cool, but when he got locked up again, it was my father who had given him his sentence, which made things worse.
I did my best to dissociate myself from the Laureaux name. The name held trauma and evil. The name shifted from being prestigious to when people heard it, they didn’t fuck with you with a ten-foot pole. I had gone from allowing muhfuckas who called me Braylen for years, only to address me as Beans. When I’m in Covana, I can’t avoid it, but when I’m in the city, I can.
Braylen didn’t exist to me. Braylen was the poster kid, the nerd, fighting to be loved, and the person who overlooked the obvious. Braylen died in his senior year of college, and Beans emerged. The wall I built was solid as hell. The feelings hiddenbehind it were stored in a deep part of my mind, refusing to be tapped into. The warm side of me turned cold, and sometimes it was both a gift and a curse. However, I preferred to keep my shit G than to let any muhfucka pull that emotional card.
I dapped up those I knew and snarled at the niggas I didn’t like. I walked over to one of my guys to let him know Scooter was up next. I wasn’t trying to wait all night. I needed to get back to campus, so we had to get in and get out. I turned to see Scooter nodding his head, trying to shake his nerves. There was something about the look in his eyes that told me he was going to crush it. He leaned toward me, “This shit is crazy!” he yelled.
I nodded. “Yeah, I’ve worked with most of these niggas. They’re lyrics are straight, but Six,” I paused as I pointed to a guy not too far from us. “That nigga’s lyrics are crazy. I don’t know much about him, though, but when he’s in here, he plays no games,” I told him.
Scooter ran his hand through his hair. “Bet.”
We stood there waiting for his turn when I felt a pair of hands on my shoulder. “Beans, long time no see,” her soft voice cascaded in my ear.
I turned to look at the face behind the voice. She was still pretty, still putting that shit on like always, but tonight my focus wasn’t on that kind of time. “Sup,” I mumbled.
She leaned all the way forward, pressing her breasts against me. “What? I can’t hear you.”
I leaned into her ear. “I said what’s up?”
She pulled back, looked me up and down, then leaned forward again, “You’re looking good.”
I sucked my teeth. “Nessa, what’s the word?”
“Nothing, it’s been a long time. You trying to catch up or what? No strings attached.”
I hadn’t hooked up with Nessa in a while. She was the only girl that I fucked with on multiple occasions. It was nice seeing her, and the offer could do me some good. It was always the ones who understood the terms and conditions of fucking with me who were the ones I liked. Nessa stood there waiting for me to respond, but before I could, Scooter’s name was being called. I tapped her shoulder and said, “I’ll get back to you,” and walked off.
Scooter stepped into the crowd as his opponent, Six, stood there laughing at him. My face frowned. I rushed over to the host, “Ayo, what the fuck is this? You can’t put Six against him. This is his first time.”
The way he eyed me let me know they were trying to backdoor me. Scooter glanced at me like I had set him up. “Fuck!” I shouted.
I tried to squeeze through the crowd to get him out of there when I felt a tug at my arm. When I turned, it was Nessa. “You come with me,” she said as the crowd became hype.
That’s when it clicked. These muhfuckas tried to get me off my square. “What type of shit is this, Nessa, you—”
That’s when I heard Six ripping the mic. The way he was clearing my nigga Scooter made me shake my head. The crowd went wild as Six said one of the infamous lines that they repeated along with him.
Scooter stood there with his jaws clenched. He nodded slowly as he took the mic into his hand. A quick grin eased on his face. I could see him focus on someone, but it wasn’t Six. “The fuck is he looking at?”
I noticed a girl standing a few people behind Six.You got this.She mouthed.
Scooter opened his mouth and let that shit go as he moved closer to Six.
