"I assume it's the same as a human.Go for the face and the nuts."This wouldn't be the first time I'd been forced to defend myself.In the past I'd found a quick crack to the nose was the quickest way to put a guy, or girl, on the defensive.Of course, I'd been facing humans not giant, horned aliens.But still, no one liked a broken nose.
"Nuts?"
I gestured at his groin.
"You know, a man's most prized possessions."
He chuckled."That would give any male with external genitals pause."
External genitals?Did I want to ask?
The answer was yes, I desperately wanted to ask, but I wasn't here to learn which aliens had dangly bits and which didn't.
"But I don't recommend aiming for a turoch's head.And not just because you're far too short to reach."
I reached up with my stick and tapped his forehead.
"I can reach with a weapon.And hitting you with that car battery worked pretty well."
Dargo grabbed my stick and held it hostage.
"You had the high ground and I was already suffering from a head injury when you ambushed me.On even terrain, going for the face is a bad strategy against a turoch."He rapped his knuckles between his horns."We battle each other head to head as soon as we get our horns, our skulls are heavily reinforced.Otherwise most young males would be walking around with their brains rattled."
"What if I broke your nose?"
He let go of my stick and leaned down until we were eye to eye.
"Hit me as hard as you can."
"I'm not giving you brain damage so you can prove how tough you are."
Dargo smirked and braced his hands on his knees.
"I want you to understand why it won't work.If you panic and go for the head on instinct, you're going to waste precious seconds and piss off your attacker."
I frowned at him, tightening my hold on the branch.It was sturdy and heavy enough to do some real damage, but if he was this confident I wanted to know what I was up against.
"Okay, but if I hurt you, it's your fault."Already feeling a little guilty, I lifted the stick over my head and brought it down between his horns.
It hit with an echoing crack, and the reverberations of the blow made my hand ache.Dargo's smile didn't waver.I don't think he even blinked.I shook out my hand and glared at him.
"Give me one more try."
"Go ahead," he said cheerfully.
I wound up again and put my whole body into the next blow, bringing it down with every ounce of strength I possesed.The stick smacked into his mohawk and broke in half over his head.
"Shit!"I dropped the branch and held my stinging hand.
"Are you hurt?"He straightened up and grabbed my hand, inspecting it as I gaped at him.
"You're not?"
He shrugged and dropped my hand once he was satisfied I was okay.
"I told you, thick skull."
"That would have put a human in the hospital," I insisted, staring at my ruined stick."That's insane."
