He eyed the stairs, considering going up to speak with her. “Don’t know.” He handed his hat over to Ghost and went to his office to pour himself a drink.
Cora stood by the window looking out until he entered the room, and then she turned on him. Her hair was like flames, ready to burn him alive. “What gives you the right to reject me one moment then announce you own me the next?”
“I didn’t—”
“Didn’t want me. Yes, I know. You’ve made that clear. I’m Irish and a disgrace. I represent everything you hate about your past. My hair should remain covered. My dress isn’t good enough.I’mnot good enough.” Her eyes shone even more green if that were possible. “You need me as much as I need you, so you can stop acting superior.”
He poured a drink but abandoned it to face her. Ghost was right.Shewas right. He needed her more than ever if he wanted a chance at saving everything he’d worked so hard for. “I didn’t ask you to keep your bonnet on because I’m embarrassed of you or because you remind me of all my past failings.” If he were being honest with himself, that was the real reason in the beginning, but not now. Now he wanted to cover her and hide her away from all those hungry men outside.
She marched over, picked up the glass, and downed the whiskey. Her eyes watered, and she coughed and choked. “I know you don’t want anyone to know you’re Irish, that you want to forget where you came from. And my hair is as Irish as it gets.”
Grace appeared in the doorway, but when he shot her a get-out-of-here glower, she retreated. He took in a deep breath, catching Cora’s floral scent, but refused to let it distract him. “Yes, I asked you to wear the bonnet because of your hair.”
“Ordered,” she snipped.
“Ordered you to because your hair draws attention to you. To the fact that you’re a one-of-a-kind, gorgeous woman who every man in this city would sell their souls to have in their bed.”
She flushed at his words, but he needed her to hear him. Ghost had a point. It was time to be honest. “I ordered you to be escorted because I’d never forgive myself if you ended up in a house of ill repute or married to a poor man with no future…or worse.”
“Why do you care so much? I didn’t come here to marry you. You didn’t betray me. William betrayed us both. You owe me nothing.”
“I owe you everything because William didn’t send for you. I did.”
She wavered on her feet, so he grabbed her waist to steady her, but she shoved him away and stumbled to the fireplace, holding her chest as if she couldn’t breathe.
He wanted to beg her forgiveness, to tell her she deserved the world, but he wasn’t the man to give it to her. She deserved better than him.
“What are you talking about? You sent for Mary Folsom. For her fortune. Not for an Irish girl with no dowry, or family name, or business contacts.”
Commotion stirred in the hallway, and he knew the servants were gathering to listen, but if he didn’t say the truth now, he’d never say it. She would hate him almost as much as he hated himself. “I thought a southern Irish woman would help tame William. He’d become wild and unpredictable. I thought if he reconnected with his heritage and had one woman every night in his bed that he’d calm and be the man I wanted him to be. The only man I could claim as my brother left alive in this world.”
The fire crackled, but she didn’t look at him or say anything. He dared to move closer to make her hear him. “When you stepped off that boat, I hated myself.”
“Why?” she asked in a choked whisper. He wasn’t sure if it was from the whiskey or emotions since she wouldn’t look at him.
He steadied his resolve. “The truth?”
That drew her to turn around as if to face him to make sure he really was being honest. “Yes. Whatever it is, I can handle it.”
But could he? “Because when I saw you, I saw my past life as an Irish man and my future as a poor man caring for a wife he couldn’t afford. Because you were the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen. Because you stole my breath and my will to succeed with one smile.”
Tears pooled in her eyes, but she didn’t shed them. Cora McKinnie stood with more strength than a hundred men.
“You said you were strong and I see now you are, so I’ll be frank. No matter how beautiful you are, I won’t marry you at the end of this. You will pretend to be my betrothed until after the party, and then we will find you a husband worthy of you.”
“We already agreed.”
He knew he risked everything by informing her of all the dangers with their arrangement, but he wouldn’t lie to her anymore. If she left, he’d figure something out and his desire would be sated. He’d be able to focus better when Cora was gone and out of his life. “You need to understand that Mr. Grous is challenging our engagement and wants to show that I’m a liar. If he succeeds, I’ll lose everything because investors hate scandals. However, to break off our engagement after the party could cause your reputation damage. I don’t believe a broken engagement will turn all men away, but there are some of high standing who would not want to marry you. That means your prospects could be limited. If we recover my funds and you’re unable to secure a husband, I’ll pay for your passage back east and for your housing and expenses until you’re able to secure a suitable match.”
“You would do all of that to avoid marriage to me, yet you say I’m beautiful and desirable.” She reached for him, but he rounded the desk to keep space between them because he feared one touch and he’d be lost forever.
“I won’t marry you because I’ll never give you what you want. A family.”
Her eyes shot wide, and she shook her head slowly. “Why? If you want me, then why wouldn’t you want a family?” Cora leaned over the other side of the desk, tempting him with the promise of her soft skin and full lips.
“I can’t.” He gripped the edge of the wood top to keep his hands from reaching for her and willed her to accept his explanation. “I can’t have children.” He couldn’t bring children into this world. Not when tomorrow he could be broke and they would starve. He’d never been able to protect anyone. He could barely protect a grown woman like Cora in his own house.
She abandoned him and sauntered to the window once more. “I’ll pretend to be your betrothed until the party. Once the funds are secure, then I’ll find a husband. I won’t be your responsibility. Not if you don’t want me to be.” Her skirts swished past him.
