“It’s Xai,” I finally reveal.
“Xai? What the hell happened?”
“We broke up.”
“Why?” she asks incredulously.
“He was keeping something from me.”
At my words, her body stiffens then she sits up straight. “Is that man married?” she asks with hella attitude.
“No,” I reply with a little grin. Her attitude is on a thousand.
“Hidden kids? He likes only women, right? Please tell me that fine man is straight!” she fires off next.
“Yes, he’s very straight. He only likes women. And no, he’s not married and he doesn’t have kids. It’s nothing like that.”
“Then, hell, unless he’s a murderer, it can’t be that bad. And don’t be mad, but are you sure you’re not bringing your old shit with Rushmore’s stupid ass into this? We women do that. A man finally comes along who’s loving you right, treating you good, and taking care of business, but he catches hell because he’s being measured by a standard you’ve never had. He can’t catch a break because the no-good fuck boy has soured you on love. Xai isn’t Rushmore. Don’t shut him out after one mistake. That man loves you, you love him, and the girls are crazy about him. If he’s worth keeping, then work it out, set boundaries, and talk. If he truly isn’t, and you can see your life without him, let him go. Either way, I’ll support you,” she says, voicing the very thoughts that had kept me up all night.
There’s no doubt that he loves me and I love him. My girls are absolutely crazy about him and he adores them. Our trust has been broken and I’m unwilling to be in another relationshipwhere I can’t trust the man in my life. And I know Kandi’s right. Rush did a number on me but I was very purposeful to not bring that damage into my relationship with Xai. It’s possible I may have failed a little and maybe I am holding Xai to an impossible standard.
Hell, I don’t know. I don’t seem to know anything right now. I’m just all over the place.
“He came by last night and we talked. I don’t know,” I admit.
“Did he beg?” she asks, then purses her lips, awaiting my answer.
“He did.”
“That’s a good ass start. Make him beg,” she says and we both laugh.
Kandi’s drive-by is definitely unexpected but much appreciated. I needed to see her, cry in her non-judgmental arms, and just talk to her crazy ass. After I clean my face, we join the girls in the living room.
She visits for a few hours and I end up making hamburger sliders and potato wedges for a late lunch. Kandi and I catch up and the girls dote on Jazzmyn. She doesn’t leave until around seven and the girls and I walk them to her ride. As soon as we are back in the house, I send the girls to their room to pick out their pjs. I head to the kitchen to clean up but stop when I hear my doorbell.
“Did you forget something?” I ask as I rush back to the front door. When I open it, I immediately see it’s not Kandi. It’s Rush’s cousin, Kita. It’s been five years, and despite her weight gain and rounder face, I still recognize her. She wears the same scowl she had the day Rush was sentenced. “Why are you here, Kita?”
“Hmph. That how you talk to yo’ guests? What, no threat since you’re making those and shit,” she says, clearly referring to my last texts with Rush.
“No threats, just promises, and guests are invited.”
“Then invite a bitch in,” she has the nerve to say.
“Nah. I’m good and I’m busy so that won’t be happening. Besides, I’ve said all I have to say to you, Rush, and everyone else in your fucking family. I’d appreciate it if you leave and don’t come back.” I start to close my door and somehow she grabs my dress. “Wh…Did you just grab me!” I yell, totally in shock.
Her next move happens in a millisecond, and before I can fucking blink, she’s pulled me outside by my shirt. I stumble a little when she does, but my reflexes and quick movement keep me steady and ready. Obviously, she came to my house with an agenda and I’m about to check the items off her list. Our eyes meet briefly and I confirm her intent.
This bitch came here to fight.
Growing up in The Manor prepared me for moments just like this. Not everybody appreciated my chill and unbothered disposition. I didn’t hang around the girls in my neighborhood because I was always at Kandi’s and that somehow made me a target. I ignored their slick comments and rolling eyes because that shit didn’t bother me. However, my lack of reaction to them annoyed them, and one day, Netra Lake thought she could put her hands on me. Me and my chill and unbothered disposition wore her ass out. She learned that day and that same lesson is waiting on Kita.
When she aggressively thrusts forward toward me, I take all my strength and ram my open hand into her face, mushing the fuck out of her. She stumbles, and unlike me, her reflexes are slow as fuck and she falls back.
“Bitch,” she grumbles when her ass hits my walkway.
I pounce. In a flash I’m on her, tagging her face with my fists. All of the audacity and aggression she had when I opened the door has vacated and she’s flailing her arms and screaming.Nothing but pure adrenaline and anger fuel me and words spew as I walk the dog on her ass.
“Bitch, coming to my house talking shit. What you got to say now, huh? Where’s your fucking attitude now? Leave…me…the…fuck…”
