‘No way.’ Ben’s jaw dropped. ‘Is that a normal Sunday lunch for your family? If so, I’d better start stretching my stomach in preparation.’
Eleanor paused, her forkful of pasta halfway to her lips. Was she going to tell him? Was it too soon to explain? Her stomach jolted as though someone were tugging at her just behind her belly button.
‘Eleanor?’ Ben was leaning forward, his hand outstretched. ‘Are you all right?’
She put her fork down and took his hand. ‘Yeah, I’m fine.’ She took a deep breath in and forced out the words that were lurking at the back of her throat. ‘It was actually the anniversary of my dad’s death on Sunday. My mum has thisridiculous tradition of cooking all his favourite meals, hence all the food.’ She dropped her gaze to the space between them.
Immediately he was by her side. ‘Eleanor, I’m so sorry.’
She rested her head on his firm shoulder. ‘That’s OK. It’s been nearly fifteen years and I always think it will hurt a little less this time, but it never does.’
He lifted her chin so that her face met his. ‘He was your dad. Of course that’s going to hurt.’
She wanted to turn her head away – the intensity of the moment was threatening to break her defences completely – but Ben held her gaze firmly. He leant in and kissed her forehead.
‘Thank you,’ she whispered, a single tear escaping down her cheek.
‘Not at all.’ He stood up and sat back down on the other side of the table. ‘Thank you for telling me. It means a lot.’
A quiet settled over the pair of them, as light and fine as dust. Eleanor had spent the past few years fearing silence. It was painful and awkward, and if it ever reared its ugly head she would desperately fill it with any topic she could find, simply as a way to prove to Oliver that she was interesting. But this was different. For the first time in a long time, she actually found she was enjoying it, the sounds of each other breathing and eating and hearts beating.
‘Wait, did you say you had a wedding drama this weekend?’ Ben sat back and pushed his empty plate away from him.
Eleanor wiped a fleck of sauce from her mouth and smiled. ‘Yeah. I had a mad dash to find a last-minute plus one. But luckily Fin stepped up and saved the day.’
‘Really?’ Ben’s face dropped. ‘That’s good.’ He fiddledwith his empty wine glass and stood up suddenly. ‘Do you want any wine or are you OK with tea?’
Eleanor eyed him suspiciously. ‘I’m good for the moment. Are you OK?’
‘Yeah.’
‘Ben?’ she asked, sensing the change in atmosphere immediately. ‘What’s wrong?’
‘I don’t know.’ He drained the dregs of his wine and shrugged. ‘I guess I’m wondering why you didn’t ask me?’
Eleanor stood up and walked over to him. She removed the glass from his hand and put it on the table, taking his hands in hers. ‘BecauseI didn’t know if it was too soon to ask! You forget, I don’t know how this whole dating thing works.’
‘I don’t know if anyone really knows how it works, to be honest,’ he replied glumly. Eleanor could tell he was still feeling put out.
‘I’m sorry.’ She gave him a little squeeze. ‘Fin volunteered and my mum had already pretty much accepted on my behalf anyway. It’s all been a bit last-minute.’
‘OK,’ he mumbled.
‘Would you have even wanted to come? To a wedding where you don’t know anyone?’ she asked.
‘Well, I quite like weddings.’ He raised one of her hands to his mouth and kissed it softly. ‘And I definitely likeyou.’
A ripple of electricity shot through her centre. She felt the sparks tingle right to the ends of her fingers.
‘Look at you getting all red and embarrassed.’ He laughed, stroking her blazing cheeks. ‘But for future reference, if you ever need a plus one to a wedding, I’m your man.’
Eleanor took Ben’s arms and wrapped them around her, placing her face against his chest. ‘Sure thing, Mr Ryans.’
‘Good. Now let’s eat dessert.’ He kissed the top of her head. ‘I’ve only bought one, though. I hope that’s OK.’
‘That’s perfect!’ She smiled, watching as he disappeared back into the kitchen.
Fin
