“I’ve been doing the same thing.” Paul hesitated, then decided she deserved the truth. “After Sophie died and Michelle left, I built walls around myself so high I convinced myself I was content behind them. Then you walked into my restaurant, and those walls started crumbling whether or not I wanted them to.”
Susan’s eyes filled. “I’m scared, Paul.”
“So am I.” He lifted her hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to her knuckles. “But I’m more scared of wasting whatever time we have by being too afraid to try.”
They sat in silence for a while, continuing to hold each other’s hands. Around them, the hospital hummed with its perpetual activity. There were distant voices moving from room to room, the soft squeak of nurses’ shoes on the linoleum, and machines beeping their rhythmic reassurances that lives were being monitored and maintained.
At around one o’clock in the morning, Isabel was reluctant to leave, but she had to open the bookstore in the morning.
Kathleen looked at Isabel and Susan’s tired faces. “Why don’t you both go home and get some sleep? Patrick and I can stay here with Lynda. When Stephanie and Matt’s family arrives, we’ll see if Lynda wants to come home with us to have a break.”
“I’ll drive Susan and Isabel home,” Paul offered. “That way, you’ve still got your truck here, Kathleen.”
Susan frowned at her friend. “Are you sure you and Patrick will be okay? I’m happy to stay if you’d like the company.”
Kathleen hugged Susan tightly. “Go home. If anything happens, I’ll call you.”
Paul helped Susan into her coat, noticing how stiffly she moved. The adrenaline that had carried her through the evening was wearing off, leaving nothing but bone-deep weariness in its wake.
Isabel hugged Kathleen, then pulled on her jacket. “Thank you for giving me a lift home, Paul. I really appreciate it.”
“You’re welcome,” he told her.
As they walked toward the parking lot, Susan stumbled on a patch of ice. Paul caught her elbow, steadying her. “Careful.”
“I’m okay,” Susan said. “I’m just tired.”
They reached his truck, and Paul held open the passenger doors. Susan and Isabel climbed in with grateful sighs, buckling their seatbelts as he started the engine.
The highway stretched before them, dark and quiet under a sky clearing to reveal hard winter stars. While Isabel dozed in the back seat, Susan sat silently in the front seat, her forehead resting against the cold window.
When they were halfway home, Paul reached across the console and held Susan’s hand, lacing their fingers together.
“Paul?” she said softly.
“Yeah?”
“Thank you for coming tonight. It means everything that you’re here.”
He squeezed her hand gently, keeping his eyes on the snowy road ahead. “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”
She was quiet for a moment, then added, “I meant what I said about not wasting the time we have.”
“Me too.”
“I don’t want to wait anymore,” Susan whispered. “Life’s too short and too fragile to keep holding back.”
Paul lifted her hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to her knuckles without taking his eyes off the road. “Then we won’t.”
Chapter 28
Paul’s eyes were gritty as he trimmed fat from a beef tenderloin, each cut requiring more concentration than it should. He’d arrived home from the hospital at a little after two in the morning. He’d had a few hours of restless sleep, then forced himself out of bed to be at the restaurant by six.
Food prep waited for no one, especially with a busy day ahead of his team. They were providing food for the open house at the Welcome Center, as well as their usual pre-Christmas bookings.
Even with all his staff helping, he was worried he’d over-committed what they could do.
Picking up his knife, he sliced through a beef tenderloin. The meat beneath his blade was perfect. It had just enough marbling for flavor, and enough grain to give the meat a perfect texture. This was simple work. Good work. And it should have kept his mind occupied. Except he kept thinking about the hospital, Lynda’s pale face, and the worry etched in her friends’ expressions.
