She quaked in her shoes, but the time for indecision was over. “I have a confession to make, Mr. Darcy,” she said, trying to sound playful, but failing miserably. “This is very difficult for me.”
Darcy fixed his attention on her in a most unsettling way. He seemed to be expecting something specific. Perhaps he already knew about Mama. Why must he be so intense?
“I am all ears,” he said, his voice sounding husky.
***
DARCY’S HEART WAS THUMPING. This was the moment. She meant to give him an indication that she would welcome his attention. Tradition dictated that the gentleman should introduce such a topic, but he liked the idea of Elizabeth initiating it. She was uninhibited, and he treasured that quality in her.
He could scarcely wait to hear what she was about to say. He longed for it with all his heart. His hands trembled with anticipation. Already he was searching around him for somewhere more hidden where he could show her the extent of his—appreciation.
“You cannot imagine how I have struggled,” she said. “You must allow me to tell you the truth.”
It was the prelude to her revelation. There could be no doubt of it. His pulse galloped, his mouth grew dry, his heart felt like it would burst.
“The fact is, Mr. Darcy, Mama does not suffer from apoplexy. It was an excuse she used to stop Mr. Collins from proposing to me. It got out of hand when Mr. Collins enlisted your help.”
Darcy’s mind fumbled to make sense of her words. They were so different from what he had expected, he simply could not comprehend them. He could not believe his ears. Standing in the middle of the pathway, he tried to gather his senses into something coherent.
“I beg your pardon, Miss Elizabeth, but I am afraid I did not hear what you just said.”
Her face scarlet, she looked down at a clump of grass in the middle of the footpath. He examined it as well, seeking illumination. Her words finally started to penetrate through the fog in his skull.
She had not intended to tell him she cared for him. That was his first comprehensible thought. She didnotcare for him.
The next realization followed quickly after. She hadlied.
It hit him with the force of a hammer. Rocking under the impact, he did something uncivil. He left her on the path without taking his leave and marched quickly away, not knowing nor caring where he was going.
Darcy stared out over a landscape he had come to love because ofher. It was grim and desolate with winter frost. There was no joy in it anymore.
How ridiculous he had been, to have expected so much of her. What on earth had possessed him to think that she was going to make such an intimate revelation?
She did not love him.The words were like ash, bleak and dead. And he was a fool. He had completely misunderstood her.
Finally, the meaning of what she had said sank in, and fury flared up like a flame inside him. Darcy had been deliberately and consciouslyfooled.
Elizabeth had not only lied. She had beenlyingto him. Bared-faced lies that had gone on for the last six days. His heart clenched and squeezed. It was the worst thing she could have done because he had never seen it coming.
He had never once in his long catalog of objections to their marriage listed duplicity as one of her faults. If anything, it was the opposite. He had always considered that, with her outspoken and direct manner, she would find it hard to survive the convoluted world of upper-class Society.
When he first arrived in Meryton, he had been jaded and cynical. He believed that all young ladies were like Caroline Bingley: plotting, scheming, and flattering their way into a gentleman’s affections. Young ladies, he thought, were all the same, decked up in demure white muslin and sparkling jewels, but with only one purpose in their lives – how to weasel their way into his heart.
Elizabeth Bennet was a breath of fresh air in a world of stale, overcrowded ballrooms where young ladies never revealed who they were. With her candid gaze, her unpretentious manners, and refusal to ingratiate herself with him, Elizabeth was a dream come true, a true partner of the mind and soul. She was sharp, alive with an intelligence that teased and sparkled. She had enchanted him by refusing to play the role society thrust on her.
He had trusted her unequivocally, and she had played him like a fool. She was as bad as all the others, only she was more devious, because he had been taken off-guard. The impish smile, the flirtatious way she challenged and confronted him – it was all nothing but a façade.
He could never let her know that he had allowed her into his heart. And to think that yesterday in the maze, he had almost declared his love! He had even been reckless enough to kiss her.
Thank goodness he had discovered the truth before it was too late. Darcy could now leave Netherfield without a moment’s hesitation. Eventually, he would remember this time with her only because it brought him the misery of knowing that there was no such thing as truth and honesty in this world.
But before he left, he would give her a piece of his mind. He would not keep silent over her treachery.
He strode back to where he had left Elizabeth. She was still standing on the path, looking distraught. Her face was drained of color, he noticed with a sense of satisfaction. He hoped she was suffering as much as he was. But there was little chance of that.
“I am truly sorry, sir,” she said. “I would have told you sooner, but I could not betray Mama.”
“So you chose to betrayme,” he said, teeth gritted, his jaw aching with the effort not to rant and shout.
