He sucks in a sharp breath, his eyes locking on mine.
“Every loss felt like a failure on my part. When Samuel died, I thought I was being punished—that I must have been evil in a former life to deserve this much pain. Yet looking back, I wouldn’t have changed getting pregnant. I wouldn’t have spared myself the heartache. Because for those blissful moments, no matter how small, they were the happiest moments of my life, even if they were followed by the worst.”
I take a steadying breath before I push on. “Now I know it was a test. A fucked-up test for sure. But it forced me to be strong, taught me how to hold on even when I was weak, and it took my love that was full of softness and yearning and turned it into something vicious.”
“I don’t understand. A test for what?”
“For you. There is no place for a soft Delphi in what’s to come. No place for me to hesitate or question myself.”
“Delphi, you’re scaring me.”
I reach across the table and take his hand in mine. “Your mom is in rehab. She checked herself in, and Greer has warned me that if she gets clean, given that she was never physical with you and wasn’t present when you were last attacked by Josh, they’ll likely place you back with her.”
His hand squeezes mine hard. “Fuck!”
I don’t chastise him for swearing, not when it comes to this. A man or a woman who he has never met, who has never lived aday in the horrors Theo has, will determine if he has to return to the hell he escaped from after finally tasting safety and freedom. It’s not fair and speaks volumes about the fucked-up system that so often fails the kids it’s supposed to be protecting.
“If a judge orders you to return to your mom, I can’t stop Greer from taking you. I won’t fight her. I’ll hug you tight and watch you go.” I tell him the harsh truth, trying to stop the helplessness from bleeding into my voice. He tries to pull his hand back but I won’t let go.
“Do not think that means I want you any less.”
“So fight for me,” he whispers.
I lean over and cup his cheek. “I’ll show Greer nothing but compliance, but me and you—we’re going to have a plan. Nobody else can know about it though, Theo. Not even Kruger. Do you understand?”
His eyes search mine before they fill with tears that he manages to wrestle under control. “I trust you, Delphi. Not one other person has cared for me the way you do.”
“I don’t know if that’s true or not because you’re easy to love. What I do know is I’ve lost child after child, and goddamn it, I refuse to lose anymore.”
His eyes slip closed. In that moment, a pact is made between us, written in love, steeped in promises unspoken, and signed with an oath. No matter what happens, I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.
“Let’s make a plan.”
He looks at me for a moment before a smile graces his lips. It’s small and shaky, but it’s there, and it gives me the strength to carry the burden of what’s to come.
Chapter Thirty
KRUGER
Something is goingon with my woman. Her store has been thriving since it opened five weeks ago, so at first I put it down to the stress. She had a seizure a week after opening. As much as I wanted to put my foot down and lock her up in our bedroom, I couldn’t. This was our new normal, and I had to find a way to muddle through, even though it went against my instincts.
I kept an eye on her as much as I could without suffocating her. If I pushed too hard, I’d be the one suffocating, likely with a pillow over my face. Today I was heading down to the Raven’s Raceway, Midas’s new venture. It had opened a week before Delphi’s place but catered to a much different crowd, bringing in a lot of outsiders for racing nights or weekends. So much so, the club was looking into buying up some properties to turn into short-term rentals. I had enough on my plate without dealing with any of that, so I wasn’t privy to the finer details. But that didn’t mean I wasn’t happy to support my brothers.
I park my bike and head inside, making my way up to the family box where Midas said he’d meet me. When I push thedoor open, I’m surprised to find Legs there and Hero fast asleep with a tiny pair of ear defenders on.
“Hey Legs, I wasn’t expecting to see you here.”
She turns at the sound of my voice and starts to get up. I wave her off, walking over and scooping up the sleeping kid and tucking him under my arm, so she can have five minutes to herself.
I rub my hand on his back as he settles and look down at Legs, who looks happy but tired. “You doing okay?”
“I’m good, promise. He’s just been a little colicky lately, so neither of us is getting much sleep.”
“You know, if you ever need a break, me and Delphi will be more than happy to take him.”
“I know. I do. I’m just not ready to be away from him yet. I know it’s stupid?—”
“It’s not stupid, Legs, and there is no pressure. It’s just an offer of support. You need us, we’re there. You don’t? Well, we’ll still be there. Okay?”
