The planner opens the door again. “I need my bride. Mrs. Sanchez, an usher is waiting to take you to your seat, and Mr. Sanchez is waiting to walk Luisa down the aisle.”
Mama squeezes me tight. “Be happy, my love.”
When she’s gone, I follow the planner out and find my father standing by the vestibule doors.
He kisses me, tears in his eyes. “You look beautiful, my baby girl. I hope you know that I want only your happiness. This is what’s best for you. I found you a good man who will be a good husband and a good father.”
I nod, my throat closing, and blink away the tears.
“None of that, now; you’ll ruin your makeup,” the planner says just before she opens the doors. “Are we ready?”
“Yes,” my father answers for me.
And then I’m walking down the aisle.
Carmen, Consuela, Ramona, and Marcella are all standing up for me as they wait at the altar in their pretty pink dresses. We didn’t have time for bridesmaid dresses, but they did a pretty good job of finding matching dresses at the department store.
Mateo stands with his brothers and three cousins, all in black suits.
He looks handsome, and he gives me a smile.
Soon, my father is giving me away, and then I’m standing next to the man who will be my husband.
I’m shaking; everything inside me is screaming to run.
I don’t want to do this.
The priest is talking, but there’s a buzzing in my ears, and I barely hear him.
I stand where I’m told; I kneel when I’m told; I rise when I’m told, through all the prayers and then all too soon Mateo and I are face to face about to exchange our vows.
But I don’t see Mateo’s face. All I can think about is the man who holds my heart.
Blue.
He came roaring into my life, disrupting my whole world, testing my boundaries and drawing out a side of me I didn’t know was there. He will always have a piece of my heart that Mateo will never have.
The buzzing in my ears returns, but this time I recognize it as the rumble of a horde of motorcycles, its sound vibrating the stained glass.
There’s a murmur in the small crowd gathered with us.
The rumble stops, and I notice Mateo’s sudden change in demeanor. He’s studying me closely, almost as if he expects me to stop the ceremony.
And then I do.
In my head, all I can imagine is that Blue has come for me and is waiting just outside the doors—that he’s here to save me.
But I know I must be the one to save myself. Whether Blue is waiting for me outside or not, I can’t marry Mateo. I can’t go through with this, even if it means I’ll raise this child alone.
“I can’t do this, Mateo,” I whisper, then squeeze his hands and slip off his ring, pressing it into his hand.
He looks down at it. “I had a feeling. Even before I heard the motorcycles. You can’t help who you love.” His eyes move past me to my line of bridesmaids, and in that split second, I remember the intimate moment I saw between him and Marcella last night at my rehearsal, and it dawns on me. He has feelings for her. He would be as miserable as I would be if we went through with this.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper.
“Go. He’s the one.”
I pick up my skirts and move down the steps from the altar.
