I might just cry if I have to toss anymore of that hard won nutrition down the sink today.
Hiking Bea’s car seat up my forearm so that it rests in the crook of my elbow, I sling the diaper bag over my other shoulder. Dalton slides the bottle into the side pocket and I smiledown at him as I huff out, “Thanks, Bud. Can you take Penny’s hand?”
“I don’ need to hold Dalfon’s hand,” Penny grumbles. Crossing her arms over her chest, she stuffs her hands under her armpits and glares at her big brother. “I a big girl, Mommy.”
I sigh, rubbing the spot between my eyes with my middle and index fingers. I have a headache from hell. But Momming never stops.
Especially single Momming to three kids under nine.
“Do you promise not to run off toward the creek?” I ask, staring down into the wide, chocolate brown eyes of my daughter, giving her the bestMom-glareI can muster. I shift Bea’s car seat up my arm again. Good grief she’s heavy.
“I pwomise.”
I sigh again and turn back toward the paved walkway that leads to our side of the duplex townhouse. I glower at the too long grass in our front yard, then sigh. I really need to mow. And weed-whip. Ugh.
I’m just stepping up onto the small paved patio to our front door when Penny squeals shrilly on a high-pitched giggle, and bolts.
“Penny!” I shout, dropping the diaper bag from my shoulder in a heap. I set the car seat down on the patio and start running after my toddler. “Dalton, stay with Bea!”
Fuck I’m out of shape, I groan as I hustle around the side of the townhouse. Her little legs are pumping as fast as they can toward the creek and a tiny shed that stands near it, her new favorite spot the last few weeks. The creek is shallow enough most of the time, but one side of it gets deeper when the rain hits—not that we’ve had any of that in weeks—but it still makes my mom heart nervous as hell for her to get too close.
“Penelope Louise!” I shout again, putting on a burst of speed. Just as she’s about to hit the water, a form steps out from behindthe shed and snatches her around the waist, hauling her away from the water and into the air.
I come to an embarrassingly awkward stop, panting. Bending over, I rest my hands on my knees as I huff for breath. Cheesus above, this is so humiliating.
“Well, this isn’t what I was fishing for, but I guess it’ll do.”
My hair has started falling out of the messy topknot it was fashioned into on the top of my head, and I blow a loose tendril away from my face as I straighten, raising my eyes to the man standing ten feet away.God, why did he have to be here today of all days?Looking likethat?
Xander holds Penny aloft with one ridiculously muscled arm like a sack of potatoes. She giggles shrilly when he reaches up and tickles the exposed flesh of her belly. Her head is dangling in front of his chest, her feet kicking wildly above his head. I shake mine. Dammit, Penny.
“You know, I just might let you cook her,” I grumble, stepping forward the last several feet. I’m achingly aware that my plum purple biking shorts have hiked their way up my thick thighs, and the loose-fitting Lainey Wilson band tee is clinging to my chest and the residual soft roundness of my stomach, my least favorite souvenir from birthing my babies. I push my glasses back up the bridge of my nose and shake my head.
“No! I don’ wanna be cook’ded!” Penny wails, flailing wildly again.
The chuckle that rumbles out of Xander’s chest is deep and light. His dark beard is scruffy today, slightly longer than normal. He’s wearing a pair of jeans that fit way too well, and an old, worn looking Sky Ridge Hotshot t-shirt that has the arms cut off. His dark hair is thick and just a tad too long, like he’s overdue for a haircut. He’s stupidly handsome.
Not that I’ve noticed. Nuh-uh. Nope.
He’s one thousand percent off limits. The caution taped, neonsigns blazing, foghorns blaring kind of off limits. Especially when he looks at me likethat.
I swing my attention back to Penny, who is still frantically kicking her feet above Xander’s head. “Well, then I guess you shouldn’t have run off after youpromisednot to. We’ve had this talk, miss ma’am.”
Reaching up, I snag my wriggling toddler around the waist and he lowers her into my arms. His hand gets caught between Penny’s stomach and my chest and I flush eight shades of red.Oh god, am I sweaty? Of course I’m sweaty, it’s like ninety degrees out. Can he feel it? Ugh, I hope not.
It’s obscenely hot out today, the late summer heat brutal, and my little sprint around the house didn’t help, I’m sure.
He pulls his hand from between my still wiggling child and my body, and I force back a sigh of relief when he steps back slightly. He nods toward the back side of the duplex. “You’ve really got your hands full with this one.”
I groan as I lug Penny up against my chest, still hanging upside down. She laughs again and I can’t help the grin that tugs at my lips or the roll of my eyes. We start our way back toward the townhouse.
“Full hands, full heart,” I laugh cheekily, my go-to response. Because that’s what everyone says when they see me with my kids. We round the corner and I spot Dalton sitting on the patio steps, rocking Bea’s car seat back and forth. He’s playing a game of peek-a-boo, making her coo, which she’s just started doing. My heart melts. He’s the best big brother.
Xander clears his throat and says quietly, “If you ever need anything, please don’t hesitate to ask.”
That weight settles on my shoulders again, like it always does. I itch to fidget with the band of my wedding ring on my left hand, but I don’t. I swallow around the lump in my throat. “Xander, we’re okay, just like the last time you asked. Cal, Scottie, and the Hansen’s come around to check on us.”
Those incredible eyes of his do that thing where he stares into mine for what feels like a small eternity, as if he’s trying to see clear into my soul, and I can’t help the flush that erupts over my chest and cheeks. He’s just so ungodly good looking I can’t help but stare back. Even if my heart has shriveled up inside my chest, and I have this self-imposed no-dating-ever-again rule, my eyeballs can still appreciate a gorgeous hunk of man.
