“What happened?” he demanded with a growl, his eyes roving over her tear-streaked face, the tangled mess of her hair.She knew one spot on her cheek had to be red, where she’d had it pressed to the hard desk.
She hiccupped and shook her head. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean for it to happen—” She shook her head again, damning the tears that wouldn’t stop. God, he was going to hate her. And Grant was right; coming home, coming here, she had only made things worse. So much worse. This whole thing should have stayed in Chicago. Her chest threatened to cleave in two. “I made a mistake c-coming here. Coming h-home. I made a mess of everything—”
“Don’t you dare talk like that,” he gritted out, searching her eyes with his. “Don’t you dare talk like that, Hope. You’re ours. You belong here, with us.”
“He h-hates me,” she sobbed and shook her head, gripping his fingers where they were clasped at her cheeks. His thumbs stroked over her skin, swiping the tears away. “And now you will, too. I can’t—I can’t do this, Van.”
“Why on earth would I hate you?” Van murmured, his words soft but intense, his green eyes boring into hers. The emotion in them… it was breaking her. What was left of her, anyway. “I’m not losing you again. I will not let you walk away from me again, Hope. I can’t. He’ll come around—”
But Hope shook her head, her lip wobbling. “He won’t, Van.”
“No,” Van bit out, his fingers tightening around her face, and she swallowed another sob. “No, Hope. You’re not running again.I need you.”
“I need you, too,” she whispered sadly. “But I won’t come between you and Grant. I won’t choose… and I won’t let you, either.”
“No,” he ground out through clenched teeth. “No. Do you hear me? You’re not running from us, Hope. You belong toboth of us.”
“I wish that were the truth,” she whispered, leaning her cheek into one of his hands. “I think we need to accept that what happened in Chicago was just a crazy, amazing, wild weekend… and that maybe that’s how it should stay.”
“No, Hope,” he argued, pressing his forehead to hers. “Please. Don’t do this. Don’t leave me.”
She laughed softly, sadly. Squeezing his fingers that still cupped her cheeks, she whispered, “I couldn’t choose between you in Chicago… What makes you think I could do it now, knowing I’m falling in love with both of you?”
“Hope,” he groaned, squeezing his eyes shut, and she couldn’t stop the sob that escaped her. He was breaking her heart. Well, what part of it wasn’t already broken by Grant. “Please don’t do this.I love you.”
Another sob broke free of her throat and she shook her head, fighting every fiber of her being from saying those words back to him. Not now. She needed him to let her go. “He’s never going to forgive me, and you won’t either… and I can’t do… whatever that was. Not again.”
“What happened?” he demanded again, staring at her. His gaze traveled over her then, as if assessing for any injuries. “What happened, Hope? What did he do? Did he hurt you?”
“We—he… he was so mad— and he…” She hiccupped, shaking her head miserably. “I’m sorry.”
“Wait… did he…” Rage crossed his features and she felt him trembling. “Did he force you?”
She shook her head again miserably, her lower lip wobbling uncontrollably. “No. No, Van. He just wasn’t listening when I tried to tell him—”
“That you wanted to wait,” he finished on a whisper, squeezing his eyes shut. He pressed his forehead to hers, his hands clasped tightly around her face. “Fuck, Hope. I’m sorry.”
“I can’t do this, Van,” she sobbed, clutching his hands where they bracketed her face. “I already love you both so much, and I hate that this is how it has to be. But I can’t do that again.”
“No, god dammit!” Van ground out through clenched teeth. Tears tracked down her cheeks and he swiped at them gently. “No. I’m not letting you walk away.I can’t.”
She smiled sadly, her lower lip wobbling. “You have to. Please.”
“I can’t,” he ground out. “I won’t, Hope.”
“Please don’t make this harder than it already is,” she begged, trying to pull away from him. He released her face, but encircled her with his arms, drawing her so close to his body there was no way to tell them apart. He rocked her in his arms as she clutched at him, never wanting to let go but knowing it was inevitable. This was never meant to work. And she had just made it worse. They would have been fine if she’d never come back home, never walked into their restaurant. One of his hands pressed her face into the crook of his neck, curving his body around hers as she cried. “Please, Van.”
“I will give you time, Hope, but I will not let you run away from me again,” he whispered into her hair, and her heart broke when she heard the raw emotion in his voice making his words rough. “Do you hear me? You are ours, even if that stupid bastard is too cowardly to see it right now. You don’t get to run away. Never again.”
She nodded, wanting to believe his words more than anything in the world. But he hadn’t seen the fury in Grant, hadn’t heard the pain in his words. And she couldn’t stand to be witness to what would happen between the two friends if she stayed.
Chapter Seventeen
The punch that landed on his cheekbone, just below his left eye, was well deserved. As was the second one.
When Van swung at him a third time, though, he caught his friend’s hand and stopped him, shoving him away. Van growled and dropped his head, ramming into his chest hard enough to seize his breath. Grant wrapped his arms around Van’s middle, picking him up off the ground and tossing him away.
“You bastard,” Van shouted as he regained his footing, and Grant just nodded. “What did you do?She’s fuckingleaving, Grant! She said she’s falling in love with us, and she’s leaving! She said if she can’t have both of us, she doesn’t want either of us. So, she’s fucking leaving me, too.We just fucking found her!”
