“I’m sorry,” I say. “That sounds really hard.”
“It was.” She finally looks up at me, and there’s a look in her eyes that makes my stomach clench with real fear. “And I keep thinking about Chloe and what she must want, even if she doesn’t say it out loud. She’s been so happy having her mom around more.”
“Emma,” I say gently, “what’s really going on here? Talk to me.”
“Have you ever thought about trying again with Victoria?” she asks.
The question catches me completely off guard. Of all the things I expected her to say, this wasn’t even on the list. I stare at her for a long moment, trying to process, trying to understand how we got here.
“No,” I say, and my voice is quiet but absolutely certain. “I haven’t. Not once.”
“But—“
“Wait.” I hold up my hand gently. “Can I explain why? Before you go wherever you’re going with this?”
She nods, her eyes bright with unshed tears.
“Victoria and I wereneverright for each other,” I tell her, choosing my words carefully because I need her to understand this, really understand it. “We were young. We thought we were in love, but looking back, I think we were just doing what we thought we were supposed to do. We never really connected on a deeper level.” I pause, gathering my thoughts. “And she left. She chose someone else over Chloe and me.” I squeeze Emma’s hand, willing her to feel the truth of what I’m saying. “What I have with you is nothing like what I had with her. Not even close. I’m in love with you, Emma. Only you. That’s not something that’s going to change.”
Emma nods slowly, but I can see she’s still working through something. Still building toward whatever is really on her mind. The tears haven’t fallen yet, but they’re close.
“I believe you,” she says carefully. “I do. But I can’t shake this worry.” She pulls her hand back, wrapping both around her mug. “I love Chloe so much and knowing how much she misses her mom...” She trails off, swallows hard. “Then last night, hearing about Victoria being back, apologizing for everything, saying she regrets what happened. I think she wants you back, Theo.”
“Emma—“
“What if I’m the obstacle?” she presses on, like she needs to get it all out before she loses her nerve. “What if you two could work things out, could give Chloe her family back, andI’mthe reason it’s not happening?”
I stare at her, struggling to find words for everything I’m feeling. Frustration that she can’t see what’s so obvious to me. Heartbreak that she’s carrying this weight of misplaced guilt. Love so fierce it almost hurts, because she’s wrong about all of this, but she’s wrong for the most loving reasons.
How can I make her understand? How can I show her what I already know in my bones, that she’s not an obstacle, she’s not a complication, she’s not keeping me from anything except loneliness and the half-lived life I’d been leading for years before meeting her?
“Hey,” I say softly, reaching across the table to take her hand again. “Look at me.”
She does, and her eyes are swimming now, tears threatening to spill over.
“You’renotan obstacle,” I tell her firmly. “And I have absolutely no interest in getting back together with Victoria. None. That’s not something I’m questioning. Even if Victoria becomes the world’s best mother, that doesn’t mean I should be with her. “
“But Chloe?—“
“Emma,” I say, keeping my voice gentle but firm. My heart breaks for her because she’s so wrong, but she’s wrong because she loves my daughter. She’s wrong because she’s putting Chloe’s needs above her own, above us, above everything. How do you argue with that kind of selflessness? “Chloe doesn’t need her parents together to be happy and healthy. She needs parents who love her and show up for her, whether they’re together or apart. She needs stability and consistency and people in her life who make her feel safe and valued.” I bring her hand to my lips, kiss her knuckles softly. “You dothat. You do that for her every single day. You’re not taking anything away from Chloe by being with me. You’readdingto her life.”
Emma’s tears are falling freely now, and she wipes at them, her breath hitching.
“I just… I think we should take some space,” she says quietly, and the words land in my chest like stones. “I hear you, I really do. But we should take time to think about what’s best for Chloe. Without me here clouding things.”
“Emma.” I keep my voice as steady as I can. “You’re notcloudinganything. You’re making everything clearer.”
“I need to be sure,” she says, and her voice cracks on the last word. “I need to know I’m not being selfish. That I’m not keeping you from something—fromsomeone—who might be better for Chloe in the long run. I need to know that staying with you is the right thing, not just the thing I want.” She takes a shaky breath. “I love you, Theo. And I love Chloe like she’s my own.”
“Then don’t do this,” I say, my voice rougher than I intended. “Don’t walk away from something real because you’re scared of a hypothetical.”
“That’s exactly why I need to think about it,” she says. “Really think about it. Because right now I’m not thinking straight. I’m too close to it. I’m too in love with you to be objective.” She meets my eyes, and the pain in her expression nearly undoes me. “Don’t you see, Theo? I’m irrationally, insanely, fairy-tale-movie in love with you. And that’s not the right place from which to decide what’s best for Chloe.” The tears cover her whole face now. “I think you should take some time too. Not a breakup. Just a break. Just to be sure. To really examine what you want.”
“Emma,” I say, and my voice is firm. “Iknowwhat I want. I’ve never been more sure of anything.”
She gives me a sad smile. “Then time apart won’t change that. And I’ll have the peace of mind of knowing we didn’t rushyou into something. That I didn’t take something away from Chloe because I was too selfish to step back and let you think.”
I want to argue and list every reason why this is unnecessary, but I can see in her eyes that she’s made up her mind, at least about needing the space. Pushing her right now won’t help. It’ll just make her feel like I’m not listening.
