Like me, Ed had been like a father to Bastian.
Yet, Bastian had still killed him.
My stomach curdled. I set the takeout container down and drank some water. I rested my head against the wall and closed my eyes.
I had to kill Bastian.
My stomach did a sickening lurch.Damn. A part of me…didn’t want to do it.
I thought of the way he’d held me.
I miss him, too.
He was the only father I ever knew.
My hands clenched into fists.
I uncovered a streak of pure darkness, Lark.
No. I wanted his voice to stop echoing in my head. I shot to my feet. I was no longer hungry. I started to pace, trying to find some calm.
It was bullshit. Bastian was just trying to justify what he’d done.
It changed nothing.
He had so many shades of gray.
“No.” I reached the window and stared out the old blinds. The apartment complex had a dowdy, internal courtyard. Someone had added a jaunty yellow sunshade umbrella over a faded wooden table, but it didn’t do much to make the space better.
I didn’t want to contemplate Ed’s shades of gray. I knew he’d snuck off sometimes. It was for secret CIA work. To protect his country. That’s why he never talked about it.
My hands flexed.
God, energy jangled inside me, wanting out.
Striding across the room, I dug around in my duffel bag and fished out my iPad. I slid back down the wall. Most nights, I sat right here. Hell, I slept in this position more than on the air mattress. Napping was another skill Ed had drummed into me as a kid.
The ability to sleep anywhere can save a good assassin’s life.
But right now, I couldn’t sleep.
I turned the iPad on and found my drawing app. I picked up the stylus and opened the web comic I was creating.
I started shading.
This was something that had come from my life before. I’d always loved to draw. I had vague recollections of my dad—a big, gruff outdoorsman—helping me. He’d taught me to draw and shade. He’d been a scientist, but had always loved art. He’d said he liked using both sides of his brain.
I worked though my current panel. I was doing a retelling of the Persephone and Hades story. My Persephone was beautiful, dangerous, and filled with attitude. She’d been dragged to theunderworld and trapped there by the darkly handsome and deadly Hades.
My Hades was tall, muscled, handsome. He wore expensive suits and owned a casino called Underworld.
I felt my muscles slowly relax, my tension ease. I sketched out their latest clash. No matter what happened, Persephone always stood up to him.
And Hades loved it.
I sketched until my fingers cramped.
My brain was getting mushy and warning me that I needed some sleep. I had to stay sharp.
