I gasped, scandalized. And unfortunately caught. My cheeks immediately betrayed me with a flush, and my heart beat out a strange, nervous flutter.
Ihadenjoyed it a bit too much. The image of him and Nisien, glistening with sweat, muscles straining with exertion, flashed vividly in my mind.
Flustered, my tongue ran away with itself. “Must be exhausting to be so admired.”
Emrys’s grin was pure trouble. “It’s a burden.”
From the face he made, I would’ve bet he had a new lady waiting in his rooms every night. I wasn’t jealous—at all.
His hand moved, warm and calloused, covering mine. The contact was light, barely a touch, yet it sent a shock through me and my magic so sharp that my breath stilled.
“I like your idea,” he said, his voice hushed. “Most wouldn’t consider the people first, as you just did.” As soon as he finished speaking, he froze. His eyes widened, and he jerked his hand back like I’d burned him.
“Lord Prince Emrys,” I said softly, wanting to seize this moment, “I was sent because my magic can soothe. But I can’t help if you don’t let me in. Every time you get near me, you raise your walls. Please let me help.”
I wanted to reach across the widening distance between us, to mirror what he’d done not a moment before, but stopped myself.
“We discussed this during your little midnight foray.” His expression darkened, and his voice grew impossibly deeper. “It’s not safe. You nearly collapsed just from reading my aura. You’refartoo sensitive.”
I narrowed my eyes, unsure if that was an insult or a backhanded compliment. “Let me decide that.”
He stared at me for a long moment, his gaze darting between my eyes and lips. Except this time, I didn’t get the feeling I was being watched by something lurking behind it.
“You’re not afraid of me,” he eventually said, as though it were the most shocking thing in the world.
“No.” It was a half-truth. I was more nervous around him than anything else. My voice dropped to barely more than a breath. “Butyouare.”
A shocking truth I hadn’t truly realized until that moment. The most powerful man in the world ran away from me at every opportunity.
His jaw became rigid, and his eyes flashed with fear, or desire, or both. He scoffed. “You don’t understand—”
Were our conversations always destined to become arguments? I took a step toward him without realizing it. My hands ached to reach out and grab him before he ran away again. But a single touch from me that night had been enough to send a visible shock through him. I didn’t want him to flee again.
“No, you don’t understand.” My voice rose. “I’ve been bombarded by everyone’s emotions for most of my life. Anger, grief, exhilaration, lust—all of it. Do you know what it’s like to feel someone else’s heartbreak in the middle of walking down a street? To feel a stranger’s fear so strongly that you drop your things and run?” I shook my head. “Well,Ido.”
“This is different,” he snapped. “It’s not just me you’re reading. I’m cursed.”
“Is it a curse?” I challenged, “or a self-fulfilling prophecy? Because from where I’m standing, you seem more melodramatic about it than anyone else. Help me understand, Prince Emrys!” I regretted the words the moment they were out of my mouth.
His eyes flashed. Something dark flickered behind them, and our moment of human connection snapped closed. “Fine!” He crossed his arms and dropped all his barriers at once.
I was instantly caught up in his flood.
Gasping, I stumbled into the nearest chair, clutching my temples. The pain wasn’t physical—it was him, and he it. Grief, guilt, fury, fear, and a strange, exhausted longing were all bundled up together in the core of his being.
It was too much. He’d been so normal for the past few minutes that I’d forgotten what lay beneath his skin.
Through the haze of his overwhelming agony, I heard the shifting of fabric and the creaking of parchment being rolled. When I creaked one eye open, he stood, smoothing out his robes as he straightened, architecture plans in hand.
“I told you.” His voice was hollow. His walls were already back up, and the emptiness I’d seen in his expression in the training yard was back on his face. Emrys stood, smoothing his tunic. Then he turned, taking the map with him.
“You have to allow me to get used to it!” I shouted after him, my voice ringing through the empty corridor. I felt the guard in the hall’s shock of surprise.
That was definitely not a very ladylike thing to do. Every moment I spent in these fine dresses, eating sumptuous meals, surrounded by the pleasant people of this kingdom, seemed to be turning me into someone else. I’d just shouted down the hallway at aprince.
I remained in the chair, slumped over, shaken and disoriented, contemplating the consequences of what I’d just done. I knew he’d begin to avoid me even more when all I wanted was to be close enough to help.
We both felt too much in terrible, opposite ways. Why couldn’t he see that?
