I lay down beside her, careful not to draw her fully into my arms, even though that was where I wanted her. Instead, I watched the rise and fall of her breath. She deserved more than a man full of fire and regret.
Gods, I wanted her. I wanted everything.
ButIwasn’t right for her yet. So I made a vow.
Every sunrise will bring me closer to being the man you need, more of the leader my people do. I won’t stop trying.
I stared at the ceiling of our tent, teeth clenched so tightly it hurt. I’d nearly destroyed a boulder to keep this fire from reaching her. But it might never be enough. I wasn’t just fighting the curse anymore.
I was sharing her with it.
Chapter 49
Isca
Everything had shifted. No more uncertain glances across the firelit camp. No more pretending that what had happened beneath the earth—when the cave nearly collapsed—or in our tent, when our walls did, was anything but real.
We’d turned an invisible corner.
And I knew without a doubt that I’d been moving toward it all along. Every time I’d met Emrys’s eyes. Every time I’d caught him looking at me for two heartbeats too long.
I wanted this. I’d always wanted this. And so had he.
Emrys had left for the parley two hours before, taking a vial of my calming tincture with him. Catrin had Adyn in her tent again. And the battalion of guards Emrys had left behind—so predictably overzealous—were arguing amongst themselves about a game of dice.
Emrys had gone so far as to present me with an extra helmet. But he didn’t want me to wear it,oh no. With a grin that looked too much like Nisien’s mischievous one, he informed me it would serve as my chamber pot until his return. I’d growled out my frustration, but the smirk on hisface reminded me of my promise the day before.
Stupid Isca.
Now I sat alone in the tent, perched over a crate, writing out my thoughts on all the ways Darreth and Gelida could come to a mutually beneficial understanding. There had to be a middle ground where the two kingdoms could co-exist without stepping on each other’s toes. Maybe we could set up a meeting between the border lords from both sides of the conflict. I could calm tempers, and Emrys could ensure there was no fighting. But there had to be more we could do…
On the off chance that I’d be summoned to the meeting, I’d chosen the red and gold dress that reminded me so much of Emrys’s cloak. I’d wanted to be ready in case he needed me, but now I was regretting wearing such a heavy gown. The morning mist had evaporated to leave behind stale air that was rapidly heating. Sweat beaded my brow as I wrote about the possibility of a marriage alliance between Lord Elid’s son, the one who’d tried to dance with me at the festival, and a daughter of his neighbors in Gelida.
Would it work? Or was I overstepping? I could ask Catrin when she came back from…whatever she was doing with Adyn in the other tent, which I was stolidly trying to ignore by keeping my mental walls up.
Tegil’s osprey watched over my flagrant use of paper, a luxury good by all standards, in silent judgement at just how much I’d changed. I had to give it to my little brother; he was right. I was adaptable. Perhapstooadaptable. I didn’t know how I could ever go back to Caervorn, I was so changed.
Then I heard something that seemed out of place.
One breath, I was alone.
The next, someone tore the air open inside our tent. Unfamiliar magic floated through the air to assault my skin like a million jagged shards of pottery.
A clipped edge of a shadow moved. Then a large hand clamped over my mouth.
My muffled scream vanished into a leather glove. I tried to hit, to get away, but all my struggles did was knock over the crate I’d been writing upon. I was lifted, and the world blinked past me in streaks of color.
I couldn’t scream. I couldn’t even think.
Once the world stopped spinning, I kicked backward, connecting with solid flesh.
But another pair of arms grabbed both my legs, easily lifting me off the ground. My arms were next, held together by bands of muscle.
Steel pressed against my throat.
A whisper from an unfamiliar voice. “Take it easy, Lady. We won’t hurt you if you cooperate.”
I wasn’t given a chance to cooperate. That leather glove moved aside, and a bitter vial jammed between my teeth. I choked. Reflex took over, and my traitorous throat chose breath over defiance before I could stop it.
