Then her moan… I was destroyed. I’d barely clung to my control while I worked to give her the release she’d soughtfrom me. That anyone could wantmestill seemed unbelievable.
But there would be no release for me. Not this morning. Duty called.
I would take out my frustration by pressing the troops to the rally point for the parley. Still, I couldn’t leave the honey-sweet moment without a parting gesture.
I kissed Isca like the world hadn’t ended and begun again in her arms. Like I hadn’t spent years locked in a prison of my own making, only to find the key nestled in her acceptance. The monster had let out a continuous, rumbling purr of magic that resonated through my entire body as we touched.
I had suspected it before, but now I knew: The beast had decided to keep her.
When I pulled away, her lips were parted slightly. I wanted to plunge back in, and take everything she would offer me, but my heart beat too loudly against my ribs. I would destroy something if I kept going.
“I have to go,” I said, brushing another kiss to her temple. “The ride today shouldn’t be as long, especially if we push through the afternoon meal. I’m doubling your guard. Don’t leave the campsite once we get there. No, in fact, stay inside the tent. I’m giving Catrin orders.”
“What just happened doesn’t mean I’ve given you permission to lock me away, Emrys.” Her voice vibrated with anger. The last thing I wanted to hear there.
“No. But if anything happens to you…” I couldn’t even finish the sentence.
I would leave every Gelidian child fatherless seeking my revenge.
Saying that aloud would only make her pull back.
If I timed everything right, the men could spend the entire afternoon resting and restoring themselves in the camp. We’d have four shifts of guards overnight to ensure everyone would wake refreshed in the morning. Then I would meet the general to see if we’d have to fight the next dawn.
I forced myself to leave the sheets, stand, and rip off my shirt.
She gave a small gasp then whispered, “Emrys, what happened to you?”
I blew out a breath. Though she’d seen me shirtless from a distance on the river, the extent of my injuries was shocking up close. I turned around. Her eyes lingered on the webwork of scars across my torso.
“War happened.” There was no use lying. “My… survival wasn’t a priority for many years.”
I should be dead several times over.
The sadness in her eyes was too much to bear, so I turned around to continue dressing. As I reached for a new tunic, her arms wrapped around me from behind.
She was sunshine on my back.
Isca spoke into my skin, the sound muffled by how tightly she was clutching me. “But you have so many reasons to survive.”
I have one now.
I turned in the circle of her arms and embraced her one last time. “You’d better sneak over to your own tent before anyone notices. Soldiers are worse than ladies in their dotage with gossip.”
The bitter truth of our world was that malicious words could hurt this soft woman, damage everything she’d done to improve Darreth. She didn’t need anyone claiming she was getting the Assembly’s work done by spending time in my bed—even if it was technically part of the truth.
Still pressed into me, she nodded.
“Plus, I’d hate to have to kill one of my own men for slandering your reputation.”
I smiled at her whispered, long-suffering “Emrys…” The muscles in my face ached, unused to the expression.
After she disappeared, the trousers came off next. The primal part of me wanted to hide them so no other man could catch even the smallest whiff of her arousal still lingering on them.
I gave it only a second’s thought then did exactly that, rolling them into a tight ball and pushing them into the lowest part of my personal bag.
Mine.
By the time I was fully armed and mounted, the world felt sharp-edged without her close enough to touch. Directing the war party toward the border was made all the more frustrating by Catrin constantly giving me a knowing, mischievous grin as she rode on one side, Isca on the other. I saw it in Catrin’s eyes: she’d clearly desired this outcome from the start. She’d nudged so many conversations, conspired in so many small ways, to force Isca and me together. Frustrated gratitude welled up in my chest. I couldn’t even bring myself to be angry with her.
