Chapter 35
Two days later
5:28 PM...
Cami had wondered if it was possible to die from shame and sadness. Newsflash: itwasn’t.
Although both things, especially in combination, made a personwantto die.
Alas, life went on. Work went on. The world kept spinning and Cami couldn’t just crawl in a hole somewhere and disappear.
No matter how much she might want to.
The heat caused by the Miami sun radiating off the sidewalk hit her in the face as soon as she stepped out of her downtown office building. It made her long for the cool breezes of the Keys. But since she had no plans for a return trip, she had to satisfy herself with the thought of driving home to her air-conditioned condo, slipping into a bath to wash away the day’s sweat, and sipping on a cool glass of Chardonnay while reading the spy novel she’d picked up in the airport on her way back from New York.
She’d tried the whole book, bath, and wine trick for two nights running. But she’d learned the thing about a broken heart was that it was impossible to numb it away, or wash it away, and no matter what she did to distract herself at night, it was still there in the morning.
So the key was to surrender to it. Wallow in it.Soakin it until her fingers turned pruney.
Someone opened the door to the pub across the street and the throaty croon of Waylon Jennings echoed out over the sidewalk.
“Fuck my life,” she muttered when her eyes instantly welled up.
Doc was a fan of outlaw country—something he’d said his father passed down to him—and hearing Waylon sing abouthaving it allonly reminded her that she had nothing. Nothing but memories.
Memories of parents who’d turned out to be everything she thought was wrong with the world. Memories of the sister who’d been her best friend. Memories of Doc’s green eyes that had seen too much of life’s miseries. Memories of that single beautiful night they’d spent together.
God, I miss him,she admitted miserably as she opened her purse to root around for her sunglasses case.
She could feel the tears building and she needed to cover her eyes. The last thing she wanted was for someone to see her crying and stop to ask if she was okay since the answer to that question wasno!She wasn’t. And she didn’t know when or if she’d ever be okay again.
She remembered something Carlotta had said once after meeting a man in Paris. She and the Frenchman had had a whirlwind relationship that, after two months, had ended as quickly as it’d begun.
“Our lives can overlap with someone else’s for the briefest of times, Cami. But in those stolen days or weeks or even months, we can grow in love and laughter and learning. And, if we’re lucky, it’ll be enough to last us a lifetime.”
Unfortunately, Cami was afraid that losing that special someone and the mourning that came with that loss might last a lifetime too.
After sliding her sunglasses onto her face, she took out a piece of gum and popped it into her mouth. If she was chewing gum,surelyshe would look relaxed to any random passersby, and they wouldn’t notice if tears slipped from beneath the rims of her shades as she walked to her car.
Thebeepwhen she hit the unlock button on her key fob was a siren’s call. Soon she would be home and she wouldn’t have to hide her misery. Before she could grab the hot handle, however, she heard her name being called over the noise of the street traffic.
“Cami!”
Her shoulders stiffened at the same time her heart sank.
She’d recognize that low, scratchy, Kiefer Sutherland voice anywhere.
Doc.
She didn’t turn around. Mostly because she needed time to swallow down her tears, but also because she wasn’t sure she was strong enough to see him again. Not yet. Not without throwing herself at his feet and begging him to forgive her. To choose her. Toloveher.
And heaven knew the last thing she needed was more humiliation. Her bosses had already raked her over the coals for what happened on Wayfarer Island. And, more importantly, her role in the events.
“You’re lucky they don’t sue!”Alex Lester, one of the firm’s partners, had yelled at her, his face apoplectic.
“They’re not the litigious sort,”she’d assured him.“The firm will be fine.”
Lester had huffed and puffed and folded his arms over his chest before finishing with,“You’d better hope so.”And then he’d dismissed her with an angry wave of his hand, and she’d known, then and there, that her upward trajectory at Leeman and Lester had just hit a granite ceiling.
