Fine, Ky, you can win this, too.I lose every inch of armor and clothing and all but leap in.
The brand on my shoulder reminds me that this was a terrible idea—but it only hurts for a moment. Or maybe the sensation of days’ worth of sweat and dirt and riding grime washing away is simply worth the pain. I sink completely under the water and hold my breath.
But once I’m there, I think of the king. I watched his reaction to Jory’s words when she was snapping at him. I saw the way her accusations struck him.
I saw it when he spoke to the people. I heard it in his voice.
For days, he’s been competent and commanding, in clear control: of himself, of his soldiers, of every situation we’ve encountered. Ofme.
When those men confronted us, he was still in control. Just...more than he needed to be.
It wasn’t until he gave the order to attack that I realized Ky is just as broken as I am. Not broken by slavers or brothels. Not broken by cruelty or pain.
Broken by war.
Do his people not see that?
DoesJorynot see that?
I come up from the water, swiping it from my eyes. I try to lie back against the edge, but thatdoeshurt, so I turn the other way and hangover the rim, water dripping from my hair to sizzle on the glass rocks below.
I shouldn’t care if he’s broken. As always, this isn’t my war, isn’t my alliance. They’re to marry, and I’m no one. I shouldn’t be here at all.
But I think of the way he let me clutch at his arm. I think of the way he let me sleep curled against him.
I think of the way he heard my fear about the slavers, and he used it to trick me to gain his freedom—but then he still rescued me from Dane.
I think of the way my heart thrums when he touches me.
I think of the way he’s really quite striking, and I still kind of hate it.
I lay so long, dozing, until the water grows almost too warm for comfort, and I wonder if this stupid king’s magic might actually start to cook me.
A stack of bottles sits on a small table just within reach, along with a wooden box that turns out to be a shaving kit. I lather and scrape my face clean, then randomly pour a jar of scented crystals into the water with me. The scent of lavender flares in the air, and bubbles swirl through the water. I duck under the surface again and scrub at my hair until it feels slick and clean. Then I hold my breath until it hurts.
When I sit up, Jory is in the doorway.
I startle so hard I almost overturn the bathtub. Thank the stars I put away the shaving razor. Water sloshes over the sides and sizzles on the stones, steam rising around me.
“Jory!Fuck.” I run a hand down my face, then flip wet hair out of my eyes.
“I’m sorry!” she cries. “I didn’t mean to scare you. You were under for so long!”
My heart is pounding. “Well, you don’t have to worry about me drowning because I nearly leapt into the fire.”
“I’ll go.” Her cheeks are turning red. “I just—it’s nothing. I thought—I don’t—”
“Stars in darkness,girl.Stop. What’s wrong?”
She turns around so she’s not facing me any longer, and even puts her hands over her eyes. “I wanted to talk to you.”
“So talk.”
“Asher, you’renaked.”
Sometimes her innocence is almost hilarious. She’s so fierce with the king, and I saw the dagger sticking out of that soldier’s thigh. But if anyone knows how sheltered she is, it’s me.
“You can’t see anything,” I say. “Ican’t even see anything. I poured an entire jar of soap in here.”
