He rubbed his hands over the thighs of his shorts, feeling raw and exposed baring himself like this."I wasn’t admitted for detox, exactly.My dad fought to get me in there to stop me from...”
“Ending it all?”she said softly.
He nodded.Swallowed, aware of just how dark and solitary a place he’d been lost in.“So I wasn’t your usual addict or alcoholic.I was in there for severe depression and CPTSD while I was weaned off my meds, in a place where I got medical, nutritional, and mental health treatment all at the same time.”
“I’m really glad your dad did that, though it doesn’t surprise me one bit.And I’m grateful that you agreed to go.”
“Oh, trust me, I didn’t want to at first.For those first few weeks, I didn’t want to be there.But I stayed because I knew going down my current path would devastate my dad.Some days were really rough, but others were better.Eventually, I started having as many good days as bad.And then one day, I even saw a tiny ray of light at the end of the dark tunnel I was in.”
“What changed?”
“A lot of things.”
“And what about physically?”
“They patched me up in Syria, then did what they could to minimize the damage when I got back stateside.Pretty good job, all things considered, but I lost some peripheral vision in my right eye.”
She nodded.“What kind of treatment helped the most?”
“Honestly?Psychedelics.They’re being used more and more to treat CPTSD and brain trauma.”
“Oh, yeah, I’ve heard that.They made the biggest difference for you?”
“That, and I started talking about it.Processing it instead of burying it or numbing it with meds.I hated it when I started, but it eventually got easier, and it really helped.Realizing I owed it to the guy who didn’t make it back from that mission.”He stopped, unable to continue.
Tell her.Just fucking tell her right now.
Willow reached for his hand, curled her slender fingers around it.Her skin was soft and smooth.“I’m really glad you’re still here, Tripp.No matter what happens with us.I’ll always be your friend, no matter what.”
Fuck.He looked away, out toward the water, throat tight and the backs of his eyes starting to sting.Thankfully, his shades hid them.
But he couldn’t stand this a second longer.The guilt.The fear.If he wanted something real with her, then he had to man up, tell her the truth, and then face whatever consequences came as a result.Anything less than that was wrong.
“Will.I need to?—”
“Well, look who it is,” a familiar male voice said from Tripp’s left.
They both looked over as Blaine sauntered over with his own iced coffee and a doughnut, wearing business clothes, his dark blond hair styled to perfection as usual.
“Hey, man.”Tripp let go of Willow’s hand and stood to shake with him.They hadn’t seen each other in person in a few months, and Blaine had only recently returned to the island.“Good to see you.This is Willow.Willow, Blaine.He’s the one who’s going to help me with your alarm system.”
“Oh, nice to meet you.Thanks so much, by the way.”
“It’s my pleasure.”Blaine shook Willow’s hand, gave her that trademark charming smile that had left a trail of broken hearts in his wake ever since Tripp had known him.“How are you holding up today?Not exactly the warmest welcome to Skelly life for you.”
“I’m all right.Tripp’s taken me under his wing.”
“Wouldn’t expect anything else.”
Willow swiveled toward them more on the bench, shading her eyes with one hand.“Did you two meet here?”
“No, overseas,” Blaine said.
“Were you a contractor too?”
He nodded.“Intelligence.You moved in next to Mae, huh?”
“I did.Hasn’t been a dull moment since.”
